“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”
Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.
And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.
Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.
That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.
There Are Only Three Types of People
“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.
There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed
And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”
There’s More To Life Than Playing Games
“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.
A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way
Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.
Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths
Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.
Big Things Come To Those Who Wait
When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.
And Of Course…
Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.