Every Arnold Schwarzenegger movie contains great one-liners, but Commando is basically a master class on how to deliver a joke after you’ve just impaled a dude with a steam pipe. Over the course of 90 blissful minutes, Arnie’s John Matrix deals out both physical and verbal “pun-ishment” in equal measure as he takes down the bad guys who kidnapped his daughter. To celebrate John Matrix’s inclusion in IFC’s Movie Madness, take a look at 10 one-liners that prove that Commando is the ultimate Ah-nuld movie.
1. “You’re a funny guy Sully. I like you. That’s why I’m going to kill you last.”
And Arnold definitely knows funny. After all, he starred in Junior.
2. “I’ll be back, Bennett.”
Arnie’s most famous line is put to good use here a year after it made its debut in The Terminator and decades before it became a tired pop culture reference.
3. “He’s dead tired.”
Colonel John Matrix is nothing if not thoughtful. Here he gives his kidnapper a blanket and asks the stewardess to make sure his friend isn’t disturbed during his (eternal) slumber.
4. “I eat Green Berets for breakfast. And right now I’m very hungry.”
Green berets, the breakfast of champions. This scene gets bonus points for pitting Bill Duke against Arnold two years before they would hunt an alien together in Predator.
5. “Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last? I lied.”
John Matrix is a man of his word. After all, he did say he was going to kill Sully. He just may have fudged the timing a bit.
6. “I let him go.”
John’s reply to Cindy when she asks what happened to Sully couldn’t be more on-the-nose. Poor Cindy probably thinks John allowed Sully to escape unscathed.
7. “I remember you…scumbag!”
John Matrix never forgets a face. Specifically when it’s attached to a scumbag.
8. “Let’s party.”
Bennett’s first mistake was bringing an Uzi to a knife fight. Also threatening the daughter of a dude who can hurl a steam pipe right through you. Which brings us to…
9. “Let off some steam Bennett.”
This one-liner has it all: impossible feats of strength, shocking violence, and a perfect pun.
10. “Just Bodies.”
John Matrix, singlehandedly cutting down on military spending since 1985.
Watch Dick Vitale give a Commando play-by-play, baby!