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What If Tinder Came Out in The ’80s? Video Spoof Makes It So

Tinder in the 80s

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Tinder is practically an institution at this point. It’s the new OKCupid, except far more easy to completely skip past the fuglies and get straight to the real business: getting to know nice neighbors with which to play cards and go to church. At least, that would’ve probably been the selling point for this app if it were invented in the 1980s.

A new video spoof from SquirrelMonkeyCom — a group of YouTube video makers obsessed with nerdy, retro and/or just plain funny videos — and their vision of a vintage, floppy disc-powered Tinder seems pretty accurate. Watch it now.

It’s super easy to sign up! All you have to do is print out a registration form, fill it out, take a picture of yourself and paste it (using glue or tape, we presume) to the profile photo box on the form, mail it in, and then wait 5-7 business days to receive a floppy disc in the mail. Of course, you then have to install the software on your computer, which needs to have a modem and an EGA card. But then you’re good to go. See? Easy!

The ’80s version has at least three things in common with Tinder classic: it’s designed for lonely people who are shy and in need of dates. Though, we doubt anyone would take a Tinder take to church. That’s, like, counterproductive. From a Millennial standpoint, everything else seems like Stone Age technology. Can you imagine waiting 7-8 seconds for each “swipe left” move to process? All the guys would’ve likely found other means of satisfaction before they found someone to “go to church” with.

In addition to Tinder, SquirrelMonkeyCom produced a couple more videos reimagining modern technologies as ’80s applications. They’ve given this treatment to Instagram…


…and Google.

You can watch more videos like these on their YouTube page.

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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