With severed heads, limbs, and manhoods routinely flying around a land where clothing is clearly optional, Game of Thrones’ mythical world of Westeros is decidedly not safe for work, let alone kids. Nevertheless, Conan and Co. took a shot at creating a child-friendly version of the epic tale with a fun-loving cartoon romp called “Lil Thrones.” (Spoiler alert: It’s still pretty traumatic.)
No matter how cutesy you make Catelyn Stark, Joffrey Lannister, and Theon Greyjoy, there’s just no sugarcoating their fates — especially Theon’s. Still, kids might take a liking to the kindly bearded George R.R. Martin who introduces the clip, maybe sparking an actual children’s series of books. But if that would distract him from finishing The Winds of Winter, we’ll have to put a stop to the whole thing.
Take a look at the animated clans below and feel terrible for Theon all over again.