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DID YOU READ

What to watch this week on IFC: Jan. 7 – Jan. 13

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It’s always a little disappointing that the new year has to be rung in during winter when it’s too cold to go outside. So we’ll celebrate the new year by watching a new season of Portlandia and a bunch of great movies from the warmth of our living rooms.

Here’s what to watch this week on IFC:

Monday

Before they put Neo in “The Matrix,” the Wachowskis made “Bound,” which airs tonight at 10:15 p.m. ET. The film stars Gina Gershon as an ex-con who falls for a gangster’s moll (played by Jennifer Tilly). They hatch a scheme to screw over a mobster (Joe Pantoliano) and steal $2 million from the Mafia. It doesn’t go so well, but that wouldn’t make for a very exciting movie then would it? Tune in tonight!

Tuesday

In “Big Top Pee-wee,” which is more nof a companion piece than a true sequel to “Pee-wee’s Big Advernture,” our beloved hero Pee-wee Herman becomes a farmer with a talking pig (voiced by Wayne White) and a slightly insufferable fiancee (Penelope Ann Miller). His simple yet somewhat boring life gets a sudden jolt of excitement when an entire traveling circus plops onto his land, courtesy of a tornado. It’s all uphill from there. Tune in at 10:15 p.m. ET to see for yourself.

Wednesday

You’ll be glad it’s Wednesday, when you watch a double dose Friday the 13th starting at 8/7c. Up first we get to watch teens (Melanie Kinnaman, Shavar Ross) turn the tables (and the chain saws) on someone wearing slasher Jason’s hockey mask in “Friday the 13th: A New Beginning” at 8/7c. Stay tuned for “Friday the 13th, Part VI: Jason Lives,” which is pretty self-explanatory. The terror starts at 10/9c.

Thursday

There’s nothing wrong with your Thursday that a little Snake Plissken can’t fix. Tune in to John Carpenter’s “Escape from L.A.” at 10/9c to watch Kurt Russell reprise his one-eyed role from “Escape from New York” as he takes down a religious fanatic totalitarian president with the help of some of his friends including Bruce Campbell, Pam Grier and Steve Buscemi in memorable roles.

Friday

A new episode of Portlandia’s third season starts at 10/9c. Watch Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein as they play out all new adventures in the weirdly wonderful world of Portlandia. Stay tuned for a sneak peek at our new animated series Out There starring the vocal talents of Fred Armisen, Linda Cardellini, Karen Mullaly and more.

Saturday

Spend Saturday in the strange world of “Dark Floors” a.k.a. the most expensive Finnish horror movie ever made. Made by Lordi, which is basically Finland’s answer to Gwar, dressing up in rubber monster costumes and churning out hits like “Would You Love a Monsterman?” The band rose to the heavy metal heights of success by winning the Eurovision Song Contest back in 2006 with a then record 292 points. Then, of course, they made a movie, “Dark Floors,” which we are airing today at 12:15 p.m. ET. Praise the Lordi!

Sunday

At 7:30/6:30c, we are walking down the mean streets of Civil War-era Manhattan in Martin Scorsese’s “Gangs of New York.” This rough-and-tumble historical epic stars Leonardo DiCaprio, as a man on a mission to come to New York to avenge his father’s death at the hands of the ruthless Bill ‘The Butcher’ Cutting (Daniel Day-Lewis), a powerful crime boss and corrupt political figure.

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Final Countdown

The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at IFC.com

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…