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“‘Crank 3’ is going to happen,” says director Mark Neveldine

“‘Crank 3’ is going to happen,” says director Mark Neveldine (photo)

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You guys don’t need to get me a present for my birthday (*coughDecember23cough*) anymore. I already got everything I wanted. That’s because Mark Neveldine — one half of the brilliant writing/directing tandem Neveldine/Taylor” — told Empire that “Crank 3” — the second sequel to “Crank,” a.k.a. one of the best action movies of the last decade, and the first sequel to “Crank: High Voltage,” a.k.a. one of the craziest action movies of the last millenium — is “going to happen.”

Empire was talking with Neveldine about his upcoming “Ghost Rider” sequel with Nicolas Cage, “Spirit of Vengeance” and asked whether he’d like to see “Vengeance” co-star Idris Elba join the next installment in the “Crank” franchise alongside series god star Jason Statham. Here’s what he said:

“I would LOVE that! Actually, we joking-but-not-quite-jokingly joked about that with Idris while we were over in Romania and Turkey. Just trying to figure out a way of getting him into ‘Crank 3.’ There are so many different ways that ‘Crank 3’ could go. We’ve been talking about the top 50 ideas we what to do for ‘Crank 3,’ so we’re just trying to pair them down. By the way, ‘Crank 3’ is going to happen, the studios are really excited about it — it’s just all about timing.”

And cue wildly enthusiastic cheering…

Here is my advice to Neveldine and Taylor if they truly have fifty different ideas for what to do in “Crank 3:” Just make them all. I will watch 50 more “Crank” movies. In each one, Statham can have a different debilitating handicap that requires all manner of recharging or juicing or having sex in public (if you haven’t seen the first two films, having sex in public is a weirdly important part of the “Crank” mythos). Like maybe “Crank 3” could be called “Crank: Hungry Heart” and in that one Statham’s artificial heart is replaced with a sentient alien creature from space that needs to constantly eat human flesh to survive. And then they follow that with “Crank: I Sock It,” where Chev Chelios goes blind and he receives new robotic eye implants that shoot death lasers, but they require a constant supply of Visine drops, so he has to keep schlepping out to CVS.

You get the idea. The possibilities really are endless. I hope we get to see them all.

Psyched for “Crank 3?” Say yes, or we’re never talking again. Leave us your exciting comments below or write to us on Facebook and Twitter.

[H/T JoBlo]

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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