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“American Reunion” trailer has a red band (camp)

“American Reunion” trailer has a red band (camp) (photo)

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It’s Halloween month, of course, and I’ve got a good scare for you this afternoon: it’s the red band trailer for “American Reunion,” the eighth “American Pie” film and the first in the series with the original cast since 2003. It may look like a comedy to you, but all I see when I look at this project is my youth, dead and wasted like so much discarded pie crust. Nothing like the realization of your own creeping mortality to put the fear of God in you.

That’s why I’m guessing this first trailer for “American Reunion” has a red band; it’s too depressing for old farts like me to watch it. Or maybe it’s the multiple masturbation jokes and the tainted sock landing on a small child. Who knows. Could be a little from column A, a little from column B. Just be aware that unless you work in Internet porn or the personal lubrication industry, it’s kind of NSFW.

Since the trailer for the original “Pie” saw Jim (Jason Biggs) get busted whilst jerking it to porn (back then it wasn’t on the Internet, it was a scrambled channel on pay cable), there’s some nice symmetry here. But then the fact that he now gets busted by his own son instead of his dad (Eugene Levy, the only guy to appear in all seven previous “Pie”s) sends me into another fit of uncontrollable sobbing.

Undiagnosed mental trauma (and kidding) aside, I am looking forward to the film, as much for the writers and directors (“Harold and Kumar”‘s Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Sclossberg) as for the return of the entire original cast. Then again, looking at that original cast a dozen years later — Biggs and Alyson Hannigan, as seen in the trailer, plus Thomas Ian Nicholas, Chris Klein, Seann William Scott, Eddie Kaye Thomas, Tara Reid, Natasha Lyonne, Mena Suvari, Shannon Elizabeth, Jennifer Coolidge, John Cho, and, of course, Eugene Levy — should be pretty fun too (and, perhaps, spirit-crushing). I’ll also be really curious to see how this film does with younger audiences. Do you they know and love the original films that way my generation did? Do they know it mostly as the generator of all those low-rent direct-to-video sequels? Do they even know it at all? The movie opens April 6 next year; if the box office is huge, I guess we’ll have our answer. If it’s not, that could be an even scarier day for Universal.

So what do you say: do you care about the “American Pie” franchise? Let us know in the comments below or on Facebook and Twitter.

[H/T First Showing]

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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