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DID YOU READ

We wash our hands of the “Contagion” of spoiler trailers

We wash our hands of the “Contagion” of spoiler trailers (photo)

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On behalf of germophobes everywhere, I’d like to give a big Bronx cheer to Steven Soderbergh for his upcoming film “Contagion,” an all-too-convincing disease thriller about a highly contagious flu that threatens to destroy all of human civilization. Looks like I won’t be sleeping ever again, thanks Steven.

Before you lather up with Purel and dive in though, a word of warning: this trailer contains what some would qualify as a pretty big SPOILER, in that it contains the death of what one would assume to be a major character in the story. We’ll discuss that fact after the trailer, but like a man who touches a doorknob right after a guy with a cold you should proceed from here at your own risk.

So, yes, the big SPOILER is that Gwyneth Paltrow bites the big one. Or is it a spoiler at all? Even people who are extremely sensitive to spoilers typically acknowledge that anything contained in a movie’s trailer is fair game for discussion. By that definition, Paltrow’s passing in the trailer cannot be a spoiler.

Still, it’s a pretty unusual move to reveal a movie star’s death in a trailer. Sometimes studios go to great lengths to disguise the fact that a big-name actor dies early in a film. Charlize Theron’s character in “The Road” — SPOILER ALERT — kills herself before the events of the movie really begin, and she’s only seen in occasional flashbacks. But that film’s trailer uses some sneaky editing to make it seem like she is a part of the core group of characters throughout the entire narrative. Take a look:

The trailer for “Executive Decision” — SPOILER ALERT — basically shows you the moment where Steven Seagal’s character dies shockingly early in the film, but it’s portrayed as just another dramatic action beat. It doesn’t really qualify as a spoiler until you actually see the film.

The degree to which a trailer should or should not reveal the story of a film is an ongoing debate amongst filmmakers and critics. Some — like director Robert Zemeckis — believe that audiences are actually more interested in films when they know the ending, so trailers for his films (like “Cast Away” and “What Lies Beneath”) routinely reveal exactly where the story goes. I’ve always hated that attitude; why pay for the cow if I’ve already had the milk for free? On the other hand, marketing like “The Road” trailer is borderline deceptive, no? What if you knew nothing about the film except what the trailer told you and you went to see it only because you love Charlize Theron? You might be pretty disappointed.

It is a bummer that the “Contagion” trailer does kind of a ruin this major plot point of the film. I assume that Paltrow must die relatively early on (in the trailer, she looks like the first identified victim of the new disease) and Warner Brothers decided in this case to sacrifice surprise for suspense. They’re telling you Paltrow dies not to ruin that story beat but to suggest that no one is safe in this movie. If Soderbergh’ll bump off Goop, he’ll bump off anyone. Maybe even everyone, from the look of that trailer.

Do you think you-know-who’s death in the trailer of “Contagion” is a spoiler? Tell us in the comments below or on Facebook and Twitter!

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at IFC.com

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

Uncle-Buck

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…