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Movie Pet Peeve #14: Characters Hanging Up the Phone Without Saying Goodbye

Movie Pet Peeve #14: Characters Hanging Up the Phone Without Saying Goodbye (photo)

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So today I’m watching the movie “Wild Things,” the 1998 erotic thriller with Matt Dillon, Neve Campbell, Denise Richards and Kevin Bacon. One scene in particular caught my eye — no, it wasn’t the make-out session between Campbell and Richards. It was an otherwise innocuous phone call between three characters who shall remain nameless for reasons of spoilers. Here is the transcript of their one-sided conversation:

Character #1: Now, look. We gotta stay calm, all of us. Now since the settlement, people think I’m rich. So I’m out there spending money, doing what rich guys do. Now this cop, Duquette, he’s gonna try and fuck with you. Don’t let him.

Character #2: Yeah, that’s easy for you to say!

Character #1: [Character #2]! Don’t fall apart! Only people who can fuck this up is us.

Character #1 hangs up the phone.

I know a transcript isn’t the ideal way to analyze a scene in a film, but do you see the problem here? No? Let me rewrite the same scene as if it actually took place in the real world, and let’s see if it becomes clearer.

Character #1: Now, look. We gotta stay calm, all of us. Now since the settlement, people think I’m rich. So I’m out there spending money, doing what rich guys do. Now this cop, Duquette, he’s gonna try and fuck with you. Don’t let him.

Character #2: Yeah, that’s easy for you to say!

Character #1: [Character #2]! Don’t fall apart! Only people who can fuck this up is us.

Character #1 hangs up the phone.

Character #2: Hello? Hello? [Character #1]? Are you still there? [To Character #3] I think we lost him. Should we call him back?

Yes, that’s right: Character #1 never says goodbye. He’s talking, he’s explaining their plan, and then he just suddenly puts down the phone without any verbal indication that the conversation is over. This is a major movie pet peeve of mine: characters hanging up the phone without saying goodbye. Think about it: how many of your own phone conversations, out of the thousands upon thousands of phone conversations you’ve had in your life, end without you saying goodbye? Maybe 1% at most? In movies this is how almost every phone call ends.

Other than the occasional angry hang-up on a girlfriend or a parent, I can’t think of any examples from my own life. Even the most dramatic phone calls I’ve ever made — job offers, deaths of relatives — they all have goodbyes. But in movies, no call ends naturally. Whoever has the most dramatic thing to say just stops talking and puts down the receiver and stars off into the distance dramatically, like a weird game of verbal chicken.

After I posted this Movie Pet Peeve on Twitter, a few people forwarded me this supercut, which is a good illustration of what I’m talking about, though it’s far from comprehensive.

Except maybe the example where an asteroid is on a collision course with earth — and you have to figure that you’ve got bigger things on your mind at that point than social graces — those are just ridiculous. Why can’t anyone just act like a normal human being in movies? It’s awful. It would be like ending a piece in mid-sentence with no conclusion and without even

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Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.

Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.


Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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Artfully Off

Celebrity All-Star by Sisters Weekend is available now on IFC's Comedy Crib.

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Sisters Weekend isn’t like other comedy groups. It’s filmmaking collaboration between besties Angelo Balassone, Michael Fails and Kat Tadesco, self-described lace-front addicts with great legs who write, direct, design and produce video sketches and cinematic shorts that are so surreally hilarious that they defy categorization. One such short film, Celebrity All-Star, is the newest addition to IFC’s Comedy Crib. Here’s what they had to say about it in a very personal email interview…


IFC: How would you describe Celebrity All-Star to a fancy network executive you just met in an elevator?

Celebrity All-Star is a short film about an overworked reality TV coordinator struggling to save her one night off after the cast of C-List celebrities she wrangles gets locked out of their hotel rooms.

IFC: How would you describe Celebrity All-Star to a drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?

Sisters Weekend: It’s this short we made for IFC where a talent coordinator named Karen babysits a bunch of weird c-list celebs who are stuck in a hotel bar. It’s everyone you hate from reality TV under one roof – and that roof leaks because it’s a 2-star hotel. There’s a magician, sexy cowboys, and a guy wearing a belt that sucks up his farts.


IFC: What was the genesis of Celebrity All-Star?

Celebrity All-Star was born from our love of embarrassing celebrities. We love a good c-lister in need of a paycheck! We were really interested in the canned politeness people give off when forced to mingle with strangers. The backstory we created is that the cast of this reality show called “Celebrity All-Star” is in the middle of a mandatory round of “get to know each other” drinks in the hotel bar when the room keys stop working. Shows like Celebrity Ghost Hunters and of course The Surreal Life were of inspo, but we thought it
was funny to keep it really vague what kind of show they’re on, and just focus on everyone’s diva antics after the cameras stop rolling.

IFC: Every celebrity in Celebrity All-Star seems familiar. What real-life pop personalities did you look to for inspiration?

Sisters Weekend: Anyone who is trying to plug their branded merch that no one asked for. We love low-rent celebrity. We did, however, directly reference Kylie Jenner’s turd-raison lip color for our fictional teen celebutante Gibby Kyle (played by Mary Houlihan).


IFC: Celebrity seems disgusting yet desirable. What’s your POV? Do you crave it, hate it, or both?

Sisters Weekend: A lot of people chase fame. If you’re practical, you’ll likely switch to chasing success and if you’re smart, you’ll hopefully switch to chasing happiness. But also, “We need money. We need hits. Hits bring money, money bring power, power bring fame, fame change the game,” Young Thug.


IFC: Who are your comedy idols?

Sisters Weekend: Mike grew up renting “Monty Python” tapes from the library and staying up late to watch 2000’s SNL, Kat was super into Andy Kaufman and “Kids In The Hall” in high school, and Angelo was heavily influenced by “Strangers With Candy” and Anna Faris in the Scary Movie franchise, so, our comedy heroes mesh from all over. But, also we idolize a lot of the people we work with in NY-  Lorelei Ramirez, Erin Markey, Mary Houlihan, who are all in the film, Amy Zimmer, Ana Fabrega, Patti Harrison, Sam Taggart. Geniuses! All of Em!

IFC: What’s your favorite moment from the film?

Sisters Weekend: I mean…seeing Mary Houlihan scream at an insane Pomeranian on an iPad is pretty great.

See Sisters Weekend right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib

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