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DID YOU READ

Bask in the Beautiful Vagueness of “Tree of Life”‘s Official Site

Bask in the Beautiful Vagueness of “Tree of Life”‘s Official Site (photo)

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Fox Searchlight just launched the “full version” of their official site for Terrence Malick’s upcoming film “The Tree of Life,” TwoWaysThroughLife.com. It is as beautiful as it is incomprehensible.

A home page of stills from the film directs you to a screen with two options: “the father’s way” or “the mother’s way.” There’s also a baby’s foot in the middle, symbollzing the powerful connection between parents and their children’s feet. Either option takes you to an assortment of stills and super-brief video clips, each with corresponding descriptions like “All a chaos?” and “They do not endure by maintaining their rigidity.” How’s that for a movie tagline! I want to see “They do not endure by maintaining their rigidity,” emblazoned on a poster above Brad Pitt’s head ASAP.

The stills and clips are numbered one through twenty, but they make just as much sense played in a random order as they do in the proper one (which is to say, none at all). As best I can gather, the film involves an asteroid colliding with earth… where Brad Pitt and his family live… Sean Penn’s looking for something in the dessert… something something, baby feet. The end.

People complain to me all the time about movie trailers. They reveal too much, they spoil the endings, they ruin the best jokes. These guys must be over the moon excited by “The Tree of Life” marketing, because movie advertising doesn’t get much more ambiguous than this. If I sent you TwoWaysThroughLife.com with no other context, and you didn’t already know “Tree of Life” was Terrence Malick’s new project, would you even be able to tell it was a movie? There’s a copyright notice for Fox, but no mention of Malick or a release date, or even the word “film.” The presence of Brad Pitt and Sean Penn are definitely a clue, bt this could just as easily be a television show, or maybe a charity campaign to raise awareness about the danger of asteroid impacts. What the heck is this thing? Doesn’t matter. Terrence Malick. Brad Pitt. Sean Penn. Baby feet. We will all go see it May 27 regardless.

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Final Countdown

The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at IFC.com

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

Uncle-Buck

Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

Always On Slightly Off