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Ten Actors Most Likely To Kick You In The Face (If You’re A Movie Bad Guy)

Ten Actors Most Likely To Kick You In The Face (If You’re A Movie Bad Guy) (photo)

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As we prepare for the Thanksgiving holiday, we are thinking of all the things we are thankful for. Obviously action movies are near the top of the list. (Right after documentaries and horror films.) Helping get us in the holiday spirit, Hero is airing at 1:35 p.m. ET.

The film stars Jet Li as a …well, hero, alongside a who’s who of ass-kicking action stars: Zhang Ziyi, Tony Leung, Maggie Cheung, and Donnie Yen. Directed by two-time Academy Award nominee Zhang Yimou, the film is a wide-sweeping epic of a time when the Chinese landscape was populated with warring kingdoms, nameless heroes, and famed assassins. Also, the fight scenes rule. Tony Leung versus Jet Li? Yeah, we’ll watch those two battle it out any day of the week.

As is typical of action movies, the fight scenes really got us thinking. Who are the ten actors most likely to kick you in the face? If you’re a movie bad guy, natch.

Here are our picks. Remember to mention them in your Thanksgiving lists:

Jet Li is a kung fu legend for a reason. Fighting an entire class of aspiring fighters? All part of being a legend:

Jean-Claude Van Damme is probably the toughest Belgian we know. Yes, that includes Hercule Poirot. Watch the final fight from “Bloodsport” and you’ll see why:

Before moving on to Hollywood, Jackie Chan fought his way to the top with incredible fight scenes like this one from “Drunken Master”:

Tony Jaamay not be as well known as Jet Li or Jackie Chan, but that just means he fights harder. We’re showing his film The Protector Sunday, Nov. 28 at 6:00 AM EDT:

Charles Bronson would kick you in the face, light up a cigarette, and adjust his ascot without breaking a sweat. He also has no qualms about grabbing a guy’s junk for a good cause:

Chuck Norris is a karate kind of guy. He first achieved notoriety as Bruce Lee’s rival in “Way of the Dragon” and then kicked ass in “Missing in Action.” And then, this one time, he fought a bear:

Bruce Lee is The Master:

While he is now a reality television star, Steven Seagal once operated a dojo in Japan and is an aikido black belt. He also doesn’t abide sass, backtalk, or lawbreakers:

If you have any doubts as to whether Jason Statham would kick a bad guy in the face, watch this clip from “The Transporter”:

Kurt Thomas. If you haven’t seen “Gymkata”, you have probably never seen a pommel horse used as a weapon:

Hero airs on IFC at 1:35 p.m. ET and again Sunday, Dec. 5 at 10:25 a.m. ET and at 6:55 p.m. ET

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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