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MTV Video Music Awards A Vapid Waste of Air Time

MTV Video Music Awards A Vapid Waste of Air Time (photo)

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Last night’s MTV’s Video Music Awards proved that it is totally irrelevant to music lovers. Perhaps that’s not a news flash, perhaps I’ve been too easily entertained in the past, but the VMA’s have finally degraded into complete worthlessness, a gratuitous celebrity hand job to the billboard pop stars. It’s a culmination of the kind of self-serving, self-fulfilling, programming akin to Fox news. Hype tea baggers, focus coverage on tea baggers, break “news” that tea baggers are the new big shit.

Replace tea baggers with Lady Gaga. Or this Justin Bieber child. Or the other incredibly lame VMA winners, like Lady Gaga, or Justin Bieber. Yes, Eminem won a couple awards, doubling up on Best Hip Hop and Best Male video. That seems excessive. Jay-Z & Alicia Keys got a cinematography nod for “Empire State of Mind,” an instant classic. But The Black Keys, a truly dope group, were the only act of any real musical interest that won an award, though I can’t comprehend how their “Tighten Up” is a “Breakthrough Video.” Dan Black’s “Symphonies” was far more deserving (along with dozens of others that went completely unrecognized).

Today’s news is filled with wild praise and excitement for last night’s award ceremony, which is to be expected given the entrenched coverage that people like Kanye West, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, and Gaga/Bieber get every day. The strangest of this was the LA Times take that the VMA’s were a sign that “Pop is getting serious again.”

Let’s not conflate Lady Gaga speaking out for gay rights with getting serious, as admirable as it is, it is irrelevant to the quality/maturity of her product. Maybe pop is getting serious again because Kanye West and Taylor Swift sang songs about each other and international debacle they created last year? Swift took to the stage, after an introduction that made it perfectly clear her performance of “Innocent” was about Kanye West interrupting her award speech last year and proceeded to belt out a melodramatic sob-along barefoot and pouting.

It was ridiculous and only topped by West’s own response, a performance called “Runaway,” that went like this:

Let’s have a toast for the douchebags / Let’s have a toast for the assholes / Let’s have a toast for the scumbags / every one of them that I know / Let’s have a toast for the jerk-offs that’ll never take work off / Baby I gotta plan, run away fast as you can.

Sounds like a plan, I couldn’t have summed up the whole show any better.

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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