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DID YOU READ

“Death Race 2000” and “Bluebeard” on DVD

“Death Race 2000” and “Bluebeard” on DVD (photo)

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It’s not difficult to let yourself get carried away by full-bore dystopian satires like “Death Race 2000” (1975), for a landfill full of reasons. Two immediately pop into mind: on one hand, unsavory poppycock like Roger Corman and Paul Bartel’s infamous film make plain the simple fact that science fiction, when it’s done properly, isn’t about thrills. It’s about ideas and social speculation, and is therefore a far closer cousin to pure satire than it’s ever been to horror films (the genre with which sci-fi is usually clumped).

You could argue it a dozen ways pro or con, but sorry, without the twisted birth imagery and post-industrial wage-slavery context and equation between commerce and rabid predation, “Alien” (for one example) would be just a horror film and also not worth remembering. With it, it’s a scalpel taken to the thorax of our socioeconomic Manifest Destiny.

Examples are everywhere, and once you grow up, you learn to appreciate dystopias particularly, because they are baldly about the present, and they wield the sharpest blades of any topical fiction. Sadly, they’re a touch out of date — virtual-life entries like “Gamer” and “Surrogates” have unsharpened teeth and tend toward action-movie bathos.

Of recent films, only “WALL-E” had the walnuts to satirize the entire thrust of the American lifestyle, even if it charmed us, too, and made a half-billion dollars in the process. If nobody got angry, chalk it up to the same superhuman self-indulgence powers the Pixar movie skewered.

06222010_Deathrace2000.jpgIn the ’60s and ’70s, things were different — fierce, wicked dystopian scenarios were hot, often popular and remarkably eagle-eyed. (When they’re remade today, as “Rollerball” or “Death Race,” they’re turned into Disney Channel young adult actioners.)

“Death Race 2000” was in its day an inevitable splooge: the future-fascist-state-ruling-by-homicidal-sport idea is at least as old as Elio Petri’s “The 10th Victim” (1965) (which is very much a comedy about televised human hunting, and vulnerable to a humorless remake soon). It’s not a notion that could’ve arrived before television, because no one had seen social control like TV before.

In Bartel’s outrageously silly take (based on a story by genre maven and filmmaker Ib Melchior), America rules the world and remains entranced and juiced only by a televised cross-country race in which the drivers accumulate points by running over pedestrians.

Think for a moment on the statement that makes to filmgoers just a few years after the cessation of fresh war footage broadcast every night from Southeast Asia, and then consider how much closer the film is to “Network” than, say, “Star Wars,” and how much closer today’s televisual fads are edging toward real-life mortal risk in order to nab viewers.

06222010_RobertaCollinsDeathRace2000.jpgGood thing the text resonates, because Bartel is a proudly tasteless oaf, and his movie was crude even by Corman’s standards, tracking David Carradine’s mysterious Frankenstein (dressed, provocatively, in B&D zippered leather) and his broad-comedy competition (including Sylvester Stallone when he could be funny) across desert byways in a set of absurd roadsters clearly inspired by Hanna-Barbera’s “Wacky Races.” (One of the racers, Pam-Grier-prison-movie vet Roberta Collins, is a Nazi covered in swastikas — imagine that today.)

“Death Race 2000” is a poundingly obnoxious film. As the TV host, The Real Don Steele, a famous LA disc jockey, is practically the film’s lead character, braying hyperbolic announcer baloney directly into the camera in a manner that should make us ashamed of advertising media in general. The cheap gore and glib attitude toward road death is its own kind of commentary, of course, as is the Orwellian agitprop-villainization of the French (!).

The race’s victims aren’t forgotten — their widows are trotted out in front of the cameras game-show style and awarded vacation homes. This was us in the Nixon era, and guess what, it still is. In the ’70s, plenty of critics (like Roger Ebert) were dismayed by the movie’s amoral attitude, but today it looks positively ethical.

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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