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3D rules, OK?

3D rules, OK? (photo)

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Turns out, Jeffrey Katzenberg was right all along. Two years ago, the Dreamworks Animation CEO was confidently predicting that they’re be 12-18 full 3D movies in the year 2010. At the time, it seemed like a huge gamble. And now he wins: next year there will be something like 30 3D features. And that’s going to be a problem.

Because, as Variety reports from the 3D Entertainment Summit in (natch) L.A. (an event Variety also happens to be co-presenting), 3D movies have been too successful too fast, and now there aren’t enough screens to go around.

Katzenberg was wrong about one thing: he was hoping to have 6,000 3D screens around the world by March, and as of June, , we were about 1,000 shy. There are too many movies and not enough places to screen them, which means that they get bumped from theaters faster. As director Henry Selick, whose film “Coraline” was kicked out of its 3D run three weeks in by “Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience,” put it, “I feel positively about designing the film for 3D and disappointed about how few people got to see it in the ideal way.”

But seriously now: do we really believe that 3D is The Future of Movies? According to way over-quoted box office analyst Paul Dergarabedian, “Monsters vs. Aliens” was the tipping point for 3D; whatever you think of that movie, it’s clearly not a landmark for the ages. Thing is, 3D is still a gimmick; “Gran Torino” was a surprise hit, but no one’s going to argue it would’ve done better if Clint Eastwood had eaten Hmong food in glorious 3D.

The process only makes sense for movies that are already supposed to be visual spectaculars (or horror movies with knives or zombies flying at the audience, which apparently never gets old.) It won’t juice up every movie’s receipts. And I suspect the studios already know that: there’s very little they’ve released in 3D that isn’t already heavily invested in visuals. 30 3D movies next year? They’re not all going to be “Avatar.” And the great 3D crisis probably isn’t going to be all that great after all, once Hollywood figures out that special prices are for visually special movies — then the number of screens and movies will be just right.

[Photo: “Coraline,” Focus Features, 2009]

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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