Inspired by their picture on the cover of SPIN Magazine and my recent review of Cadillac Records, I’ve decided that I’m going to write/direct/produce a full-length motion picture on the lives and times of U2–yes, another musical biopic, if you will.
Since I am blogging for a film channel’s website, I’ve got some good resources around here and figured this is the best place to start. And as you should know, because I’m obsessed with the Beastie Boys, I’m also hoping Adam Yauch’s Oscilloscope Laboratories will snatch this up for distribution right away. What do you say MCA?
As of now, I have no script written, but I have begun casting. Here’s who’s starring in my soon-to-be-made (knock on wood) motion picture:
1. Kevin Bacon as Larry Mullen, Jr.
The most accomplished actor in my cast. Not only does he have an impressive film résumé, but he’s also in a band, The Bacon Brothers. I know he’ll have no problem whatsoever playing a rock star. I also wanted him in my film, so I could create a whole bunch of new links in that six-degrees-of-Kevin-Bacon game.
2. Benji and Joel Madden as Bono
I don’t know if Good Charlotte’s Benji and Joel Madden have any acting experience, but they’ve been hanging out with all those actors and socialites in Hollywood, so I’m sure they’ve picked up something. I also wanted my Bono to have some experience playing live music. I know Good Charlotte’s not in the same league as U2, but the Madden brothers have played to large crowds before–which is going to pay off big when I do the recreation of U2 playing “Sunday Bloody Sunday” at Red Rocks. I’m also casting twins for the role, just in case one them gets tired and fidgety on set–kind of like how the Olsen twins both played Michelle Tanner in Full House.
3. Sacha Baron Cohen as Ali G as The Edge
The screen test was amazing! Don’t doubt Sacha Baron Cohen’s dramatic acting skills for one second, especially when he’s playing a character within a character. Surprisingly, his guitar chops aren’t too shabby either.
4. Dr. Drew Pinsky as Adam Clayton
What? He doesn’t have acting experience? I beg to differ. Apparently you never saw Wild Hogs or New York Minute (speaking of the Olsen Twins). I’m also casting Dr. Drew for my U2 biopic, hoping that he’ll pull double duty and keep the set free of drugs and drama. Because I’m pretty sure he can’t play bass, we’re paying Flea a day rate to come in for all the close-up, bass-plucking shots.