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DID YOU READ

The last defender of independent film.

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Paradise sucks.
Wired News‘ Chris Kohler went with Wired editor Chris Baker to the US premiere of Uwe Boll’s "Postal" — that would be Raging Boll’s latest game adaptation, the one with the 9/11 sight gag:

"It’s like we were in ‘Nam together," Baker said to me after it was done, our faces set in stunned silence. "We can’t ever explain it to other people, but we’ll know."

Kohler posted a review of the film that, as has been the pattern regarding critical reception for Boll’s work, was less than favorable, though it ended with a slight up note: "I’m kind of sad I saw this for work, because maybe it would be awesome if I was blind drunk." Boll, who has staked his place in film history for being the first filmmaker to publicly, physically pummel his critics, was quick to fire back a reply and a correction:

chris
your review shows me only that you dont understand anything about movies and that you are a untalented wanna bee filmmaker with no balls and no understanding what POSTAL is. you dont see courage because you are nothing. and no go to your mum and fuck her  …because she cooks for you now since 30 years  ..so she deserves it.
people like you are the reason that independent movies have no chance anymore.
uwe boll
PS:  POSTAL is R RATED   . The MPAA understood the satire  — you not — you dumb fuck

And it goes on, and will cumulate with an interview later in the week.

A few less confrontational press encounters out in the world: Scott Raab profiles Sean Penn at Esquire:

You’re no kid anymore — how do you keep your energy up?

"Rage."

Rage?

"Rage."

Liam Lacey at the Globe and Mail discusses the violent, naked (woohoo!) bathhouse fight in "Eastern Promises" "that will undoubtedly prove the major talking point of the film" with David Cronenberg:

Working initially with models, he told the stunt co-ordinator what he wanted. The stunt co-ordinator spent a couple of hours a week with the three actors involved, with Cronenberg dropping in to monitor the action. Then the actors performed it in slow motion while Cronenberg worked out his camera moves: "I didn’t want Bourne [Ultimatum]-style impressionism where you don’t actually see what’s going on. People go to the movies to transform, or live another life, and I wanted them to feel that they were there, that they were vulnerable."

And Stephen Dalton at the London Times chats with John Waters about the doc he’s the subject of, Jeff Garlin‘s "This Filthy World":

“Camp, to me, is two older gentlemen talking about Rita Hayworth in an antique shop,” he grimaces. “I still feel more comfortable in a punk rock bar than a gay bar. I’ve never done what you’re supposed to do, I’ve never been to the gym in my life. I’d rather have the body of a junkie.”

+ Having A Boll: Scenes From the Postal Premiere (Wired)
+ ‘You Dumb F*ck’: Uwe Boll Responds To Our Postal Review [Update 3] (Wired News)
 + Penn (Esquire)
+ David delivers, again (Globe and Mail)
+ Grandmaster trash (London Times)

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Uncle-Buck

Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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