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Cannes too.

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Still lookin' good.
Going to Cannes for only a few days was a terrible tease, though we’re hardly complaining. Orange France, which provided internet access at our hotel, did not get along well with our blogging tool, so we have a few late, backlogged reviews to post shortly.

We were given the okay to go far too late to apply for a press badge from the festival’s famously draconian press office, but IFC did provide us with a bluish badge, the mysterious nature of which we did not manage to divine, as every time we used it to get into a screening we were told to stand in a different line. Once, waiting for what turned out to be the premiere of Hou Hsiao-hsien‘s "Flight of the Red Balloon" as well as the opening night of Un Certain Regard, we were let in first and ended up sitting across the aisle from Juliette Binoche and co. It was all very bewildering and exciting.

We mooched into the first press screening of "My Blueberry Nights" via a means we were too chicken to repeat, and so on Thursday morning with no screenings open to us we wandered over to the Carlton to watch, with dozens of our peers and the slightest amount of malignance in our heart, as Jerry Seinfeld, clad in a Styrofoam bee costume, slid down a zip line accompanied by "Flight of the Bumblebee" to promote "Bee Movie."


Seinfeld went down once, arms flailing, went back up, and went down a second time, clearly a little sooner than he had planned — he looked stricken as they unhooked him on the dock to head to the press line, but valiantly pulled himself together while others headed off to eat the buffet lunch provided by DreamWorks. Those we spoke to about the stunt were mildly impressed, if also curious about the insurance costs of slinging a famous comedian off a ten-story luxury hotel.

We were given the opportunity to attend one red carpet premiere, for "Les Chansons D’Amour." If you’ve been watching the Cannes Cam at all, you’ll have a sense of what that was like — everyone piles into cars to be driven to the Palais, which is, naturally, only about a five-minute walk from all of the major hotels. When you exit at the entrance of the red carpet, there’s a flutter from the barrage of amateur photographers and fans gathered on the median until they realize you’re no one of importance, at which point you can meander around the red carpet until a polite Cannes staff member observed that you perhaps would like to go inside and take a seat and leave some room outside for the talented and famous. Our experience was considerably improved by the fact that we were walking next to a French starlet named either Alice or Alison, and so could pretend we were walking away from hoards of tuxedoed paparazzi yelling our name.

The red carpet for Cannes anniversary anthology film "Chacun Son Cinéma" was, we were told, a madhouse, though it will probably be outdone by Thursday’s premiere of "Ocean’s Thirteen." Still, no one’s made a bigger entrance yet than Alain Delon, who appeared late and set the crowd screaming with excitement. Here, the "Chacun" directors gather on the steps to the Palais:


The most interesting thing we learned at Cannes is that it’s very not in vogue to be fond of the Coen brothers. We’ve heard, either directly or indirectly from three different critics that "No Country For Old Men" is good, but that they just don’t like the Coens. Who knew?

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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