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DID YOU READ

Opening This Week: January 26th, 2007

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By Christopher Bonet

IFC News

[Photo: “Smokin’ Aces,” Universal Pictures, 2007]

A round-up of the best (or worst) $10 you’ll spend this week.

“Blood and Chocolate”

The producers of “Underworld” present us with yet another female-fronted supernatural thriller, as “Dreamland”‘s Agnes Bruckner must choose between her loving boyfriend or her family’s secret society of werewolves. The trailer comes packed with brooding dark visuals, lycanthropian special effects and an Evanescence song.

Opens wide (official site).

“Catch and Release”

Kevin Smith in a chick flick? Though our irony meter may have just gone through the roof, somehow we’re disappointed in Academy Award-nominated screenwriter Susannah Grant’s feature directorial debut, which casts Jennifer Garner as a woman who finds comfort in her fiancé’s friends after his sudden death. Now we love us some Garner, whether she’s just having fun (“13 Going on 30”) or kicking some serious ass (“Alias”), but a sad Garner is something we just don’t want to see. Hopefully she can pull it off.

Opens wide (official site).

“Epic Movie”

We’re sure we’re not the only ones who request that these “_____ Movies” just..stop. Though some film spoofs may be guilty pleasures (“Airplane!” and “Spaceballs” still best many of the comedies today), “Epic Movie” appears completely lost on us, as the trailer implies that pretty much every major film released in the past two years will be spoofed somehow. Lazy, yes, but we’re keen to see Crispin Glover spoofing Willy Wonka. If only Tim Burton had thought of it first.

Opens wide (official site).

“Nomad: The Warrior”

The nation of Kazakhstan regains some of its dignity following the political debacle of “Borat” with this historical epic set during the 18th century as it tells the story of a young boy who is destined to unite the three warring tribes of Kazakhstan against invaders and national enemies. “Nomad” stands as the most expensive film ever to be shot in Kazakhstan at $40 million and is the nation’s official entry for the Best Foreign Language Film for the Academy Awards.

Opens in limited release (official site).

“Seraphim Falls”

Also known as “James Bond vs. Oskar Schindler: The Ultimate Battle”. Okay, maybe not so much, but this revenge thriller pits our third-favorite Bond, Pierce Brosnan, against Darkman himself, Liam Neeson, set in the American West following the Civil War. Our expectations for this film aren’t very high, but judging by the film’s trailer, frequent TV director David von Ancken’s first feature promises to be a fun time. Plus, you can’t go wrong with Pierce’s mighty fine beard.

Opens in limited release (official site).

“Smokin’ Aces”

“Smokin’ Aces” is the type of movie that Guy Ritchie probably would make if he were still allowed to make them. Fortunately, “Narc” director Joe Carnahan is clearly up to the task of directing a hyper macho action film about a group of assassins trying to kill a sleazy magician (Jeremy Piven); the rest of the cast includes Ben Affleck, Ryan Reynolds, Andy Garcia, Alicia Keys and many others. The film may not be one of the best of the new year, or even any good, but it looks like one of the most fun films of an otherwise drab January.

Opens wide (official site).

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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WTF Films

Artfully Off

Celebrity All-Star by Sisters Weekend is available now on IFC's Comedy Crib.

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Sisters Weekend isn’t like other comedy groups. It’s filmmaking collaboration between besties Angelo Balassone, Michael Fails and Kat Tadesco, self-described lace-front addicts with great legs who write, direct, design and produce video sketches and cinematic shorts that are so surreally hilarious that they defy categorization. One such short film, Celebrity All-Star, is the newest addition to IFC’s Comedy Crib. Here’s what they had to say about it in a very personal email interview…

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IFC: How would you describe Celebrity All-Star to a fancy network executive you just met in an elevator?

Celebrity All-Star is a short film about an overworked reality TV coordinator struggling to save her one night off after the cast of C-List celebrities she wrangles gets locked out of their hotel rooms.

IFC: How would you describe Celebrity All-Star to a drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?

Sisters Weekend: It’s this short we made for IFC where a talent coordinator named Karen babysits a bunch of weird c-list celebs who are stuck in a hotel bar. It’s everyone you hate from reality TV under one roof – and that roof leaks because it’s a 2-star hotel. There’s a magician, sexy cowboys, and a guy wearing a belt that sucks up his farts.

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IFC: What was the genesis of Celebrity All-Star?

Celebrity All-Star was born from our love of embarrassing celebrities. We love a good c-lister in need of a paycheck! We were really interested in the canned politeness people give off when forced to mingle with strangers. The backstory we created is that the cast of this reality show called “Celebrity All-Star” is in the middle of a mandatory round of “get to know each other” drinks in the hotel bar when the room keys stop working. Shows like Celebrity Ghost Hunters and of course The Surreal Life were of inspo, but we thought it
was funny to keep it really vague what kind of show they’re on, and just focus on everyone’s diva antics after the cameras stop rolling.

IFC: Every celebrity in Celebrity All-Star seems familiar. What real-life pop personalities did you look to for inspiration?

Sisters Weekend: Anyone who is trying to plug their branded merch that no one asked for. We love low-rent celebrity. We did, however, directly reference Kylie Jenner’s turd-raison lip color for our fictional teen celebutante Gibby Kyle (played by Mary Houlihan).

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IFC: Celebrity seems disgusting yet desirable. What’s your POV? Do you crave it, hate it, or both?

Sisters Weekend: A lot of people chase fame. If you’re practical, you’ll likely switch to chasing success and if you’re smart, you’ll hopefully switch to chasing happiness. But also, “We need money. We need hits. Hits bring money, money bring power, power bring fame, fame change the game,” Young Thug.

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IFC: Who are your comedy idols?

Sisters Weekend: Mike grew up renting “Monty Python” tapes from the library and staying up late to watch 2000’s SNL, Kat was super into Andy Kaufman and “Kids In The Hall” in high school, and Angelo was heavily influenced by “Strangers With Candy” and Anna Faris in the Scary Movie franchise, so, our comedy heroes mesh from all over. But, also we idolize a lot of the people we work with in NY-  Lorelei Ramirez, Erin Markey, Mary Houlihan, who are all in the film, Amy Zimmer, Ana Fabrega, Patti Harrison, Sam Taggart. Geniuses! All of Em!

IFC: What’s your favorite moment from the film?

Sisters Weekend: I mean…seeing Mary Houlihan scream at an insane Pomeranian on an iPad is pretty great.

See Sisters Weekend right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib

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