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DID YOU READ

“The Fountain” and “Idiocracy.”

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"'Zardoz' anyone?"
The estimable David Hudson at Greencine Daily have been covering Venice so thoroughly we feel comfortable being lazy and not bothering at all. Still, worth a mention is the apparently dismal reception that greeted the premiere of Darren Aronofsky‘s "The Fountain." Wire reports have the film being booed, and both Variety and the Hollywood Reporter are withering in their respective summations. Leslie Felperin in Variety:

Greeted by booing at its first press unspooling, pic’s hippy trippy space odyssey-meets- contempo-weepy-meets- conquistador caper starring Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz suffers from a turgid script and bears all the signs of edit-suite triage to produce a still-incoherent 95 minutes.

Ray Bennett at the Hollywood Reporter:

It has big names in Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz and Ellen Burstyn; fantastical sets featuring Mayan warriors, the tree of life and a bubble space ship that travels amid the stars; and a frame of reference that draws from the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. There’s a biblical puzzle that needs deciphering, so if Warner Bros. Pictures in the U.S. and 20th Century Fox internationally can somehow tie a "Da Vinci Code" reference into their marketing, they might snag a quick boxoffice return. Otherwise, "Zardoz" anyone?

Oof. At BBC News, a quote from Weisz, putting on a brave face and supporting her director fiance at the press conference: "I think it’s wonderful that this film is so different. I would love to work with Darren again."

We’ve been grouping "The Fountain" with "Southland Tales" in our mind for so long (hotly anticipated, overly ambitious-looking sci-fi film from hotshot boyling who insists on additional graphic novel side project) we sort of assumed it would tank, and feel oddly guilty now.

Another anticipated (and perhaps overreaching) sci-fi follow-up, Mike Judge‘s "Idiocracy," opened to zero fanfare this Friday in a few scattered cities. The film follows "average American" Joe Bowers (Luke Wilson) 1,000 cryogenically enabled years into the future, where everyone’s become much dumber. What reviews there are (the film wasn’t screening for critics) have been mixed: Robert Abele at the LA Weekly suggests that "[i]f you crave a lively and funny trek through the farcical possibilities of unchecked dimwit power, Judge is still your guy. Just go rent Beavis and Butt-Head Do America instead." Joshua Rich at Entertainment Weekly is unimpressed (Or is he? Curse you, enigmatic blurb review!); Robert Koehler at Variety finds the film flawed but likable: "Judge is terrific on the movie’s big strokes, and its needling of how truly bad things can get when dumb folks have power, but his script and direction struggle with the details and individual scenes tend to fall considerably short of their comic potential." Carina Chocano at the LA Times is enthusiastic in her praise:

Judge has a gift for delivering brutal satire in the trappings of low comedy and for making heroes out of ordinary people whose humanity makes them suspect in a world where every inch of space, including mental, is mediated. The movie would be worth seeing for its skewering of the health system alone — in the future, hospitals will resemble a cross between a chain auto-diagnostic center and a Carl’s Jr., powered by Help Me technology — even if its opening thesis on the moment in history (roughly now) that evolution tipped into devolution weren’t so clear-eyed.

For reasons unfathomable, that line from "Demolition Man" about the "franchise wars" and all restaurants being Taco Bell in the future has lingered with us (if an earworm is a catchy song, it would follow that the thought is a brainworm, except that a brainworm is an actual parasite). So we were pleased to read the following (from Koehler’s Variety review): "Judge bravely bites the hand that feeds him — the Fox News Channel is this future world’s only news source." Hah! "Now all news is Fox News." God forbid.

+ The Fountain (Variety)
+ The Fountain (Hollywood Reporter)
+ Weisz ignores film festival boos (BBC News)
+ IDIOCRACY
(LA Weekly)
+ Idiocracy
(Entertainment Weekly)
+ Idiocracy (Variety)
+ ‘Idiocracy’ (LA Times)

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Uncle-Buck

Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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