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DID YOU READ

The week’s critic wrangle: Pretty dismal.

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If you judge your week-to-week quality of life solely on the basis of new theatrical releases, you’re probably pretty unhappy about now.

In the suburbs, no one can hear you scream.+ "The Quiet": Jamie Babbit (of "But I’m a Cheerleader") has managed to get her suburban Gothic thriller released by Sony Pictures Classics, but that doesn’t save it from the critics. "What if it’s not cell phones, iPods, MySpace or whatever that’s keeping the teen demographic out of movie theaters? What if, instead, it’s the movies’ endless reduction of their complex, muddled and — gasp! — occasionally enjoyable lives to a bunch of recycled social-problem clichés?" muses Ella Taylor at LA Weekly. Owen Gleiberman at Entertainment Weekly complains that Babbit "thinks in stereotypes so thin that they put you to sleep the moment they open their mouths." At the New York Times, Manohla Dargis squashed hopes of lurid, campy fun: "Neither ambitious enough to take seriously nor sleazy enough to enjoy, ‘The Quiet’ flirts with the trappings of exploitation cinema without going all the way." Andrew O’Hehir at Salon finds that the film "wobbles around between genres, a terrible example of what can happen when the wrong sets of talented people get together." And this week’s Reverse Shot three are so disparaging that they have to dredge up old Sam Mendes resentment to bear some of the ire — a selection from lead reviewer Lauren Kaminsky: "[T]his film somehow manages to surpass even ‘American Beauty’ (to which the filmmakers no doubt hope their effort will be compared) in hateful representations of women, dopily sympathetic men, and heaps of misplaced misogyny."

 

3000!+ "Idlewild": Word is mixed on music video director Bryan Barber‘s feature debut. On the likey side is Entertainment Weekly‘s Owen Gleiberman, who’s near ecstatic, writing that "I’m not sure what OutKast fans, let alone the Snakes on a Plane crowd, will make of it, but Idlewild is a film of spiky delights — a vision of African-American pop culture rising above the heartache and sin that has nurtured it." Also fond, in a rather bemused way, is the Chicago Reader‘s Jonathan Rosenbaum, who blurbs that while there are plenty of flaws in the film, "director Bryan Barber and his cast display so much gusto that it’s hard to keep up your resistance–I wound up finding this more enjoyable than the Oscar-bestrewn Chicago." Salon‘s Stephanie Zacharek writes nicely that:

"Idlewild" is a wild, sprawling movie, one that’s bound to be underestimated and misunderstood. But maybe the best way to read it is to treat it as a dream history, as a testament, to borrow [Stanley] Crouch’s words, to the ways that inventing, borrowing and refining can bring us closer to the lives we want to lead — yet even within that framework, there’s no guarantee of happiness.

Less won over are Manohla Dargis at the New York Times, who calls the film "as much a missed opportunity as a terrible tease" and who bemoans Barber’s love of narrative clichés and editing choices; Dana Stevens at Slate complains about the same, and seems to judge the film more fun in theory than in practice. Michael Atkinson at the Village Voice starts off what seems like it will end up being a good review, but actually goes downhill quite quickly (a fate shared, in his opinion, in the film). He does, however, like the film’s "sober, loving respect for history and the old South." And at the New York Press, Armond White, of course, is roundly unimpressed: "OutKast’s long-gestating feature film debut finally hits the big screen in the dog days of summer. That’s because it is a dog—with a bling-bling collar." He does make an interesting point:

Barber avoids putting a single white face on the screen which, in post-Spike Lee terms, is probably a point of pride. But it’s racist; it also puts black pop in a void. Eddie Murphy did not make this error in Harlem Nights nor did Tap or White Nights, the ’80s dance musicals recently released on DVD that are now Gregory Hines’ legacy.

Barber displays a weird nostalgia for what never was. Idlewild’s fantasy of an all-black world with a self-sustaining economy has a downside: it reflects back only the egotism of the star performers who must feel that they have transcended the vicissitudes facing other blacks. Rooster and Percival do not strive for Utopia, just their own success. In this sense they’re not just outcasts with strange, artsy ideas, but outside any uplift-the-race ethics. (Their nadir: repeating Eminem’s 8 Mile mantra “You only get one shot at success!”)

 

Chandrasekhar and crew.
+ "Beerfest"
: Expectations aren’t exactly high for Broken Lizard‘s latest effort, which makes its goals of being unreviewable pretty clear in its trailer. Still, Salon‘s Andrew O’Hehir takes time to muse about the difficulties of writing about dumb comedy in his review, claiming that "I can’t claim to know, in any scientific way, that ‘Beerfest,’ the high-concept new movie from the Broken Lizard comedy troupe, is a disappointment." To him, it is, if a mild one, and Scott Foundas at LA Weekly feels the same way: "’Beerfest’ bubbles with the cheeky irreverence of early John Landis and David Zucker. Yet, like just about every other American screen comedy of the moment, it’s far too long in the tooth, with a scattershot final half-hour that seems the work of an editor battling a bad hangover." And at the New York Times, Jeannette Catsoulis judges the film "increasingly incoherent," but in a good way? It’s hard to tell.

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Final Countdown

The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at IFC.com

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

Uncle-Buck

Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…