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“The Road To Guantanamo.”

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"They would not abuse us or treat us badly."
"The Road to Guantanamo" depicts a whole range of government-approved non-torture and acts of injustice, but what’s really shocking is the film itself, the calculated cinematic equivalent of a blow to the gut. At a time when earnest agenda-docs about important, dire issues are a dime a dozen, rarely reaching past the same crowd of pre-concerned arthouse-goers or leaving any kind of lasting mark, "The Road to Guantanamo" effortlessly gets under your skin, mostly because it’s only partially a doc. Michael Winterbottom and co-director Mat Whitecross have taken the accounts of the Tipton Three and made them into a lean and jittery re-enacted drama — a thriller, really. It’s uneasy, but undeniably effective — the tale of three hapless heroes who suffer at the hands of an Orwellian system, only to emerge unbroken and triumphant. And we’re the bad guys.

Asif Iqbal, Ruhel Ahmed and Shafiq Rasul are three Pakistani boys from the British midlands who, with two other friends, went on a trip to Pakistan, where Asif was to get married. Through a series of sometimes fuzzily reported misadventures, they ended up in Afghanistan right as the bombings began and were eventually rounded with Taliban troops and surrendered to the US, transferred to Guantanamo Bay and held for two years without being charged. Footage of the three (now all in their early-to-mid 20s) recounting their story is intercut with re-enactments of what they describe, played out by first-time actors shooting on location (well, not the Cuba part). All hand-held camerawork and washed-out color, the scenes recall and are sometimes blended with actual news footage, a technique Winterbottom used in 1997’s "Welcome to Sarajevo" and which comes across as a bit of a mindfuck in this melange of nonfiction and narrative.

Terrible things happen to Asif, Ruhel and Shafiq before they ever come into contact with the Americans — they lose one of their friends, they almost die several times — and the moment (a sizable way into the film) in which they’re informed "You’re in US custody now!" comes with a strange mixture of relief and dread. The camp at Guantanamo is depicted as a purgatory of boredom and semi-civilization. On one hand, you do get fed regularly and are given medical care; on the other, you also get chained in stress positions for hours with a bag over your head, and interrogated endlessly ("I want to know. Where. Bin Laden is!" one officer snarls), without even the possibility of exoneration in sight.

It’s impossible to walk out of this film feeling any less than righteously enraged, but we couldn’t help feeling manhandled as well — the film’s purpose may be to pull strings, but Mr. Winterbottom, must you tug so hard? Both in real life and in fiction, the Tipton Three are disarmingly young and slightly goofy — we don’t need anything else to make them more palatable or their experiences more disturbing, but we’re still subjected to sunny flashbacks of happier times (one in particular depicts them eating pizza and checking out a girl — yes, yes, just like any other teenagers, see?). The Americans are opaque and thuggish, and, cruelest slight of all, seem to be played by weaker actors; the Brits are ineffectual. But the telling details are never so overt. In one fortuitous scene that rings truer than anything else in the film, a US soldier quietly wakes one of the boys in the middle of the night because there’s a tarantula in his holding cell, a cage out in the open air. The soldier opens the door, creeps in, and stomps the spider to death, and the pair share a moment to marvel — whoa, that thing was huge! — before the soldier gently tells the boy to go back to sleep, and strides off into the night. Mission accomplished: the monster vanquished.

Opens in limited release June 23rd.

+ "The Road to Guantanamo" (Official site)

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.

Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.


Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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