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Oscar trailings-off.

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Why CAN'T we be friends?
We know, we’re sick of it all too, but these are worth it.

Wondering what Stephen King thought of the Oscars? Wonder no more.

"Crash" was the perfect alternative, and — ahem — I had it picked for Best Picture the whole way. It’s the sort of flick the Hollywood establishment loves best and will always embrace, if given the chance, one where the complexities are all on the surface; its issues should come stamped GOOD FOR 2 SLICES OF PIZZA AFTER THE MOVIE (OR) 1 COCKTAIL PARTY. "Crash" says we have problems. "Crash" says we have troubles. It says this modern life of ours is certainly a pain in the ass, especially this modern urban life. People keep ”crashing” into each other (heavy symbolism at work, better wear a hard hat). But in the end — this is the part Academy voters like best — we can all get along if we rilly, rilly TRY!!! You almost expect to hear ”Why Can’t We Be Friends?” over the closing credits.

Wondering what Andrew Sarris thought of the Oscars? Not so much, perhaps? Well, le voila:

The biggest in-your-face moment was the selection of "It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp," performed by Three 6 Mafia, as the Best Movie Song—prompting Mr. Stewart at his most sagacious to announce the following Oscar score: Three 6 Mafia, 1; Martin Scorsese, 0. Bravo, Jon. People may tell you that you bombed, but it was the audience that actually did.

At the London Times, Chris Ayres has a very funny piece on the dubious honor of being one of the select members of the press "On The List" at the Vanity Fair post-Oscar party…but the article that really has a heart is Steve Lopez‘ description of his first day venturing out into post-"Crash" LA at the LA Times:

As I pulled into the parking lot, Latino, Asian, white and black patrons were coming and going without apparent incident, but it was early.

I got out of my car, looked both ways, and dived for cover when I saw an Asian driver enter the parking lot.


Still in one piece, I spied a suspicious black man standing in the parking lot next to a car.


Or was it worse? Was he reaching into the glove box for a pistol, planning to knock off Yoshinoya and pistol-whip customers for their teriyaki chicken bowls?

You know it’s hard out there for a pimp.


+ Analyzing Oscar (Entertainment Weekly)
+ Oscar Wiles: A Roundup of Delights, Disappointments (NY Observer)
+ As Elton was saying to me… (London Times)
+ The Best Picture Misses the Big Picture (LA Times)

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The Best Of The Last

Portlandia Goes Out With A Bang

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The end is near. In mere days Portlandia wraps up its final season, and oh what a season it’s been. Lucky for you, you can watch the entire season right now right here and on the IFC app, including this free episode courtesy of Subaru.

But now, let’s take a moment to look back at some of the new classics Fred and Carrie have so thoughtfully bestowed upon us. (We’ll be looking back through tear-blurred eyes, but you do you.)

Couples Dinner

It’s not that being single sucks, it’s that you suck if you’re single.

Cancel it!

A sketch for anyone who has cancelled more appointments than they’ve kept. Which is everyone.

Forgotten America

This one’s a “Serial” killer…everything both right and wrong about true crime podcasts.

Wedding Planners

The only bad wedding is a boring wedding.

Disaster Hut

It’s only the end of the world if your doomsday kit doesn’t include rosé.

Catch up on Portlandia’s final episodes on demand and at

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Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

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