The Big Lebowski Dream Scene

Bad Trip

The 10 Funniest Drug Freak-Outs

Freak out with That '70s Show Mondays & Tuesdays starting at 6P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

While most characters from pop culture blissfully mellow out when they partake, not everyone is quite so lucky. Before you get weird with the cast of That ’70s Show tonight starting at 6P, check out some funny drug freak-outs that prove letting loose can occasionally be overwhelming. It wouldn’t be called a “trip” if it wasn’t memorable.

10. Wet Hot American Summer

USA Films
USA Films

A quick trip into town turns into an ACTUAL trip for Beth (Janeane Garafolo) and the counselors of Camp Firewood. The gang gets into all sorts of debauchery, from smoking joints and eating whole containers of McDonald’s french fries to downing a six-pack and snorting cocaine. It all goes downhill pretty fast when they wind up shaking and sweaty in a local drug den after stealing an old woman’s purse and shooting up heroin. It’s always fun to get away from camp, even if it’s just for an hour!


9. That ’70s Show, “Till the Next Goodbye”

70s Show Drugs
Carsey-Werner Productions

After years of pot-smoking circles in the basement, Red (Kurtwood Smith) and Kitty Forman (Debra Jo Rupp) finally catch Eric (Topher Grace) and his friends Fez (Wilmer Valderrama), Hyde (Danny Masterson), and Kelso (Ashton Kutcher) in the act. But their stern lecture doesn’t exactly get through to the totally blazed boys. Eric sees the walls behind his parents moving. Fez has a warped fishbowl vision of the adult Foremans. Hyde’s focus is drawn to a lone Twinkie on the shelf behind Red, and Kelso imagines Kitty and Red’s heads floating through the air and swapping bodies. Now THAT’s a real head trip if we ever saw one!


8. Arrested Development, “Afternoon Delight”

Arrested Development
Fox

Despite her constant drinking, Lucille Bluth (Jessica Walter) can still be a smidgen uptight, which is why son Michael (Jason Bateman) tells his uncle Oscar (Jeffrey Tambor) to give the visibly stressed Lucille some “afternoon delight.” Oscar mistakes it for a particularly strong strain of pot called “Afternoon Deelite,” which he bakes into a brownie and gives to Lucille. A lyric in the song version goes, “Mama always said when it’s right, it’s right,” but we’re not sure that applies to driving her Mercedes-Benz over her son-in-law Tobias (David Cross) and into the family banana stand containing her son, Gob (Will Arnett). More like an afternoon disaster.


7. Freaks and Geeks, “Chokin’ and Tokin'”

Of all the freakouts on our list, Freaks and Geeks‘ Lindsay Weir (Linda Cardellini) definitely wins for most realistic. Lindsay decides to try pot for the first time following a fight with ex-boyfriend/resident pothead Nick (Jason Segel), completely forgetting she had agreed to babysit the neighbor’s kids. Luckily, straight-laced former BFF Mille (Sarah Hagen) is there to talk Lindsay through her paranoia over “being inside the dog’s dream,” take control of a game of hide-and-seek that quickly goes awry, and stuff Lindsay full of Fruit Loops in hopes of sobering her up. “I know what high people look like,” Millie assures her.”I went to a Seals and Crofts concert last summer.”


6. The Breakfast Club

We want whatever was in those joints our Jock, Brain, Basket Case, Princess, and Criminal smoked in the library during their Saturday detention at Shermer High School. After sneaking a stash of pot from out of Bender’s (Judd Nelson) locker, our Breakfast Club sit around mellowly passing joints and talking save for jock Andrew (Emilio Estevez) who hot boxes in the foreign language listening room. When he emerges, he launches into an athletic dance break worthy of Kevin Bacon in Footloose full of kicks and punches finally screaming so loud he shatters the glass of the door. As the pot works its magic, the confessions get more personal, and the dancing more vigorous. This is one Breakfast of Champions.


5. The Big Lebowski

Now THAT’s a strong drink. After questioning him on the whereabouts of his missing porn star and the money she owes him, Jackie Treehorn (Ben Gazzara) drugs the Dude’s (Jeff Bridges) White Russian, which knocks him out. Unconscious, the Dude hallucinates an elaborate dance sequence featuring bowling paraphernalia and the beautiful Maude Lebowski (Julianne Moore). Talk about tripping major bowling balls.


4. Old School

When wild Frank (Will Ferrell) accidentally takes a tranquilizer to the jugular, the world around him really slooooooows down. He goes crashing through best friend Bernard’s (Vince Vaughn) kid’s birthday party, falling into the pool, and hallucinating his ex-wife on the beach while Simon & Garfunkel plays in the background. When he wakes up, he’s making out with animal wrangler, Peppers (Seann William Scott) by mistake. That’s ONE way of subduing a party animal.


3. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

On a road trip/ “trip” to Vegas for the Mint 400 motorcycle race, pals Duke (Johnny Depp) and Gonzo (Benecio Del Toro) drop acid. By the time they check into their hotel on the Strip, Duke is nearly out of it, sweating profusely and hallucinating the other guests and hotel staff as various types of lizards. Once in their room, Gonzo and Duke order more room service than Kevin McAllister at the Plaza in Home Alone 2, and try not to freak out over war footage on the television. Considering their suitcases are full of other psychotropic drugs, it’s a good thing Vegas has so many buffets.


2. 9 to 5

9 to 5
20th Century Fox

Sometimes, you just gotta have an old-fashioned pot party with your girlfriends. Judy (Jane Fonda), Violet (Lily Tomlin), and Doralee (Dolly Parton) are commiserating together one night at a bar after a particularly awful day at work when Judy finds a “Maui Wowie” joint left by her son in the bottom of her purse. The trio return to Doralee’s house and start tokin’ it up, prompting each to have a pot-fueled fantasy about how they’d kill off their sexist boss (Dabney Coleman). Judy becomes a film noir femme fatale complete with black & white cinematography. Doralee, unsurprisingly, takes a cowgirl approach with a rope before roasting Hart on a spit. Violet’s fantasy goes sadistic Disney complete with animated animals and a Snow White-esque costume. Sweet dreams, ladies!


1. 21 Jump Street

21 Jump St
Columbia Pictures

When undercover cops Schmidt (Jonah Hill) and Jenko (Channing Tatum) get sent back to high school to investigate a new popular synthetic drug, they never expect to experience the effects of it firsthand. After being forced to take it in front of the most popular student, Eric (Dave Franco), the two start going through the various stages of the drug: hallucinating moving eyebrows on the P.E. teacher (Rob Riggle), making asses of themselves during play auditions and band practice, feigning sexual acts with a baton during a track meet, and finally, passing out cold. If ever there was a case to be made for bringing back the D.A.R.E. program, this is it.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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Breaking News

From Canada With Love

Baroness von Sketch Show comes to IFC.

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Breaking news that (finally) isn’t apocalyptic!

IFC announced today that it acquired acclaimed Canadian comedy series Baroness von Sketch Show, slated to make its US of A premiere this summer. And yes, it’s important to note that it’s a Canadian sketch comedy series, because Canada is currently a shining beacon of civilization in the western hemisphere, and Baroness von Sketch Show reflects that light in every way possible.

The series is fronted entirely by women, which isn’t unusual in the sketch comedy world but is quite rare in the televised sketch comedy world. Punchy, smart, and provocative, each episode of Baroness von Sketch Show touches upon outrageous-yet-relatable real world subjects in ways both unexpected and deeply satisfying: soccer moms, awkward office birthday parties, being over 40 in a gym locker room…dry shampoo…

Indiewire called it “The Best Comedy You’ve Never Seen” and The National Post said that it’s “the funniest thing on Canadian television since Kids In The Hall.” And that’s saying a lot, because Canadians are goddamn hilarious.

Get a good taste of BVSS in the following sketch, which envisions a future Global Summit run entirely by women. It’s a future we’re personally ready for.

Baroness Von Sketch Show premieres later this summer on IFC.

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