DID YOU READ

10 Times Marc Maron Had Bad Luck With Women

Megan

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By Nikki Wantz

Marc Maron might be considered a self–obsessed misanthrope with a particular “je ne sais quoi” that keeps us glued to our televisions every week, but the real meat in Maron’s muddled misadventures are the women. They are interesting, complex and often bring out the best (and worst) in Marc. Let’s honor them by counting down some of the most memorable women on Maron and their cringe-worthy encounters with the show’s star.

10. Shay, “Boomer Lives”

Shay was Marc’s good-natured neighbor who also had a missing cat. It seemed like they had an instant chemistry until Marc finds out she’s not buying what he’s selling. Oof. Back to the drawing board.

Shay


9. Caroline Rhea, “Nostalgic Sex Buddy”

Newly single Marc wants no frills sex? When fellow comic and former flame Caroline Rhea makes an appearance it seems like he met his match. But he ends up getting more than he bargained for.

Caroline


8. Rachael Harris, “Yoga Teacher”

Marc saw a meaningful relationship with Rachael. (It helps that they both share a common bond in dating emotional terrorists.) Unfortunately, Rachael wasn’t done with dating screwed up guys and ended up leaving Marc in the dust. At least he tried!

Rachel


7. Sydney, “Mouth Cancer Gig”

Sydney (Tig Notaro) was the concierge at the Lubbock, Texas hotel where Marc stays while on the road. He shows her an unsightly sore on his mouth, to which she replies, “I’m not allowed to give out medical advice anymore.” (Anymore? What’s the story there?)

Maron (Season 2) -Photo Credit:Chris Ragazzo/IFC ©2013


6. Justine, “Dominatrix”

Justine was so nuts, she had an entire episode named after her chosen profession. They say don’t judge a book by its cover but you can barely get through a few pages of Justine without cringing. Run, don’t walk away. When he could have had a nice girl, which leads us to…

Justine


5. Megan, “Dominatrix”

Megan was perfect for Marc. She’s beautiful, articulate (aside from not listening to The Stooges) and was generally interested after Illeana Douglas gave her the hard sell. Even after he went with Justine, she gave Marc another chance. Geez Marc, fall for the nice girl already!

Megan


4. Lauren, “White Truck”

Marc meets Lauren in a parking lot and before they know it sex happens (well, that was easy). Little did Marc know about the husband she was kinda sorta leaving but actually wasn’t. Pro-tip: If you’re not sure someone is getting divorced, make sure you have a shotgun handy or at least a pair of boxing gloves.

Lauren


3. Alexia, “A Real Woman”

Alexia is beautiful, age appropriate and knows good tunes! Too bad she had ulterior motives leaving Marc in an awkward unexpected position. Sadly, not a first for him.

Alexia


2. Toni Maron, “The Mom Situation” and “Marc’s Family”

It’s not going out on a limb to say his mom is a major reason Marc has issues with the fairer sex. She’s cruel, vapid and might make a better Disney villain than a mother.

ToniMaron


1. Jen, Various episodes

Jen was the closest Marc has come to a serious relationship thus far. They even lived together for a while, even though the whole thing was based on a lie. Will we see Jen again? For Marc’s sake, it’s probably best if we don’t.

Jen

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Inauguration Alternative

Bill Murray On Repeat

It's a movie "Murray-thon" all-day Friday on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs courtesy of GIPHY

Democrats, Republicans and Millennials agree: 2017 is shaping up to be a spectacle — a spectacle that really kicks into high gear this Friday with the presidential inauguration. Not only will the new POTUS swear in, but all the Country’s highest offices will be filled. It’s a daunting prospect, and to feel a little anxious about it is only normal. But if your anxiety is snowballing into panic, we have a solution:
Bill Murray.

He’s the human embodiment of a mental “Happy Place”, and there’s really no problem he can’t solve. So, with that in mind, how about we all set aside reality for a moment and let Bill take the pain away by imagining a top-shelf White House cabinet filled exclusively by his signature characters. Here are a few hypothetical appointments for your consideration…

Secretary of Defense:
Bill Murray from Stripes

His incompetence is balanced by charm, and dumb luck is inexplicably on his side. America could do worse.

Secretary of State:
Bill Murray from Lost In Translation

A seasoned globetrotter steeped in regional traditions who has the respect of the whole wide world. And he kills Costello in karaoke, which is very important.

Press Secretary:
Bill Murray from Ghostbusters

“Cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria.” Dude knows how to brief a room.

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Bill Murray from What About Bob.

A doctor-approved people person who knows that progress is measured in baby steps.

Secretary of Energy:
Bill Murray from Groundhog Day

Let’s be honest, this world is going to need a lot of do-overs.

Feeling better? Hold on to that bliss. And enjoy a healthy alternative to the inauguration brouhaha with multiple Murrays all Friday long in an IFC movie marathon including Kingpin, Zombieland, Ghostbusters, and Ghostbusters II.

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Home Run

Hank Azaria Gets Thrown A Curve Ball

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Unless you’ve somehow missed every episode of the Simpsons since 1989, then surely you know that Hank Azaria is one of the most important character actors of our time. He’s so prolific and his voice is so dynamic that he’s responsible for more iconic personalities than most folks realize. Basically, he’s the great and powerful Oz — except that when you pull back the curtain the truth is actually more impressive. And now Hank is coming to IFC to bring yet another character to the TV pop culture hive mind in the new series Brockmire. Check out the trailer below.

Based on the following Funny or Die short and co-starring Amanda Peet, Brockmire follows the story of imploded major league sportscaster Jim Brockmire as he tries to resurrect his career by calling plays for a floundering minor league team in a podunk town.

The series is written by Joel Church-Cooper (Undateable) and produced by Funny or Die’s Mike Farah and Joe Farrell, meaning that there’s funny in front of the camera, funny behind the camera–funny all around. Sounds like a ball to us.

Brockmire premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia On People Who Can’t Park

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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If flagrant bad parking takes nerve, then retaliatory note writing takes neuroses. Watch Fred and Carrie take passive aggression to next level in Car Notes, the new Portlandia web series presented by Subaru. The first episode is yours right here and now, and you can see every installment of Car Notes anytime online, on the IFC app and on demand.

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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