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CB!B! Flashback

10 Classic Comedy Bang! Bang! Moments

Scott and "Weird Al" remember some classic CB!B! moments tonight starting at 11P on IFC.

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With Comedy Bang! Bang! hitting its 100th episode, we thought we’d take a look back at some of the weirdest, most farcical and insane moments Scott Aukerman (“Hot Saucerman”) and the crew have ever cooked up. To see what Scott and “Weird Al” have in store for the 100th episode, be sure to tune in tonight starting at 11P.

10. The Oh, Hello! boys crack up Scott and The Lonely Island

We’re only at the midway point of season five, and already this latest batch of episodes has produced several classic CB!B! moments. We’re still laughing at Nick Kroll and John Mulaney’s appearance as those Upper West Side-dwelling, Alan Alda-worshipping weirdos Gil Faizon and George St. Geegland. Watch their segment above and witness Andy Samberg and the Lonely Island guys attempting to keep it together.


9. See Through Burritos

Burritos

In this riff on David Cronenberg’s The Fly, Reggie gets superpowers when he accidentally microwaves himself with a burrito. Now, thanks to the laws of science, he can see through tortillas. It goes without saying that he’s super psyched. No more mystery when it comes to what other people are eating. Shredded Chicken. Carne Asada. Reggie always knows. But with great power comes great responsibility, as long as that responsibility involves tortillas.


8. Cowboy Poetry by Dalton Wilcox

Dalton Wilcox

Andy Daly is a mainstay on Comedy Bang! Bang!, and with good reason, if “Poet Laureate of the West” Dalton Wilcox is any indication. With his folksy poems about hard living on the plains, he seems to be the rugged ideal of an Old West cowboy. That is unless you let him read his poems all the way through, and realize 75% to 80% of them are about having sex with a hole in the ground. And if that isn’t your cup of tea, stick around for the poem about all the people he accidentally killed because he thought they were vampires.


7. Reality House

Reality House

It’s hard to find an original slant on the reality show genre these days, but Aukerman and the CB!B! writing staff are never one to shy away from a challenge. Here, actual reality show stars like Reza Farahan, the muastachioed hunk from Shahs of Sunset and ex-Bachelor contestant Lucy Aragon, take place in a competition called “Reality House,” which seems to consist of host Scott Aukerman reading the same bewildering cue card every day for weeks, while the confused contestants become more and more confused. No one has any idea what type of show this is, what they’re supposed to do, or really anything at all. Well, Farahan does know one thing. He isn’t here to make friends…or is he?


6. Scottie Scares ‘Em

Scottie Scares

Scott is a friendly guy, so it probably shouldn’t come as a shock that he’d use a hidden camera prank show to make friends. In this classic CB!B! sketch, Scott dresses up as a bush to scare some unsuspecting passerby, but when one, then two, then all of them want to join the show, “Scottie Scares ‘Em” slowly morphs into “Scottie, Greg, June, Lisa & Sarah Startles and Caught-Off-Guards ‘Em Featuring Stu (Vouched for by Dave).”


5. Topher Grace Tries To Shoot Seth Rogen

Topher Grace

Celebrity cameos are a mainstay of Comedy Bang! Bang!. You never know who’s going to stop by, or who they’re going to kill. Thank god for Will Arnett, who cameos here to talk down Topher Grace, playing a cameraman who wants to “take the shot,” and kill Seth Rogen’s picture of himself surfing once and for all. Pretty typical stuff. Action movie icon Fred Williamson even shows up, to question why Arnett is so hard on the young That’s ’70s Show star. Maybe it’s because he sees some much of himself in the kid. All of that for a thirty second gag?


4. Make The Sweater Better

Sweater

In this sketch, Scott sends up a variety of TV show genres with his “Make The Sweater Better” show. He’s here to “make a cargi-GAN out of this cardi-GAN’T,” and save your favorite sweater! But as the show progresses, fixing sweaters falls by the wayside, as his trip between locations on “historic Route 66” takes up more and more time. He starts dropping cheap catchphrases like, “I did have a cow, man,” and “Mmmmm, you’ve got to lick it before you kick it.” His hair grows frosted tips, a goatee crops on his face and his shirt becomes emblazoned with flames. Before you know it, Scott has gone full blown Guy Fieri, unable to leave a frame without chanting, “hasta la vista, baby.”


3. Fourvel Gets Stabby

Fourvel

For fans of the Comedy Bang! Bang! podcast, Bobby Moynihan’s orphan boy, Forvuel, is a familiar face, er, voice. A castoff scamp, he spends his days hunting for scraps, and desperately trying to get adopted. But don’t cross him, because he’s quick to pull a knife and get all stabby. Just ask his birth family, who he killed because “they were all up in my grill.”


2. Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber pens an epic musical

Webber musical

Paul F. Tompkins‘ take on the Phantom of the Opera creator is always a welcome presence on the CB!B! stage. But for one classic episode, the Lord deigned us all with a brand new musical starring Casey Wilson, Scott and Tom Lennon as The Phantom of the Studio. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house (probably because of all the smoke effects).


1. Scott Does the Time Warp Again

Time Warp

Last season’s Halloween episode has quickly become an all-time classic, thanks to a brilliant homage to the Rocky Horror Picture Show featuring Kid Cudi in a Riff Raff-like role, guest Robert Kirkman as Dr. Scott and Scott himself channeling Dr. Frank-N-Furter. The sight of Scott in a wig and fishnets is not one we’ll soon forget.

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SAG Life

Rappers Act Up

Watch the Yo! IFC Acts Movie Marathon Memorial Day Weekend.

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Photo Credit: Courtesy of the Everett Collection and the '90s)

Memorial Day weekend: how to celebrate? Nothing quite says “screw spring—let’s do summer” like blockbuster movies starring rappers who ditched lucrative music careers in order to become actors. It happened a lot, remember? Especially in and around the ’90s. Will Smith, Eminem, Ice Cube, Ice-T, Marky Mark Wahlberg, Ludacris…icons with the hubris to try the silver screen instead and have it totally work out.

But what if more rappers had made the leap? That’s a rhetorical question—movies (and life) would’ve been better, obviously. To prove it, here are some movies that totally would’ve been more memorable with rappers.

The Godfather

Starring Biggie, not Brando.
Godfather-BIG

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Only Coolio could improve upon Gene Wilder’s performance.
Coolio-Wonka

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Billy Elliot, with a dose of Missy Elliott.
Missy-Billy-Elliott

Robin Hood: Price of Thieves

Low hanging fruit, Hollywood.
Robin-Hood-and-Lil-Jon

And of course…

Kanye-of-The-Lambs

See NONE of those movies and a whole bunch of real ones this Memorial Day weekend on IFC’s rapper-filled movie marathon.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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