Revived and Derived: “Freaks and Geeks” Ep. 5, “Tests and Breasts”

In which there is a dirty joke, a cheating scandal and the Muscular Dystrophy Carnival.

Matt: My reading of the scene between Daniel and Sam is your first suggestion: as unreceptive as he is to Lindsay’s tutoring, Daniel genuinely appreciates her effort. Imparting a little carnal knowledge to her younger brother is Daniel’s misguided attempt to repay Lindsay. Then again, as you point out, “Tests and Breasts” shows Daniel to be a master manipulator. Maybe I’ve been just as fooled by Daniel’s good lucks and tousled hair as Lindsay.

Maybe Daniel doesn’t about Sam and his hormonal problems at all, and that the whole porno gambit is merely a way of keeping Lindsay on his side. On the other hand, Lindsay’s never aware of Sam’s predicament, so unless Daniel was going to go bragging to her about it (“Hey y’know your brother didn’t know where on the female anatomy chart the vagina was so I gave him a porno movie!”), that doesn’t seem too likely.

But that’s what’s so wonderful about how “Freaks and Geeks” is expanding our relationship with its characters: it’s exploring them without softening or simplifying them. Just as “Kim Kelly Is My Friend” uncovered that character’s troubled home life without excusing her bad behavior, “Tests and Breasts” shows us more about Daniel without sacrificing his edge. If anything, Daniel’s less likable by episode’s end than he was before. The freaks definitely don’t have it easy, but the show doesn’t let them off the hook for their bad behavior, either. Daniel may have been labeled a dummy at age 11 but that doesn’t excuse the way he exploits his pain at age 16.

“Tests and Breasts” also deepens our understanding of the teachers of McKinley High. Nickman presents the McKinley faculty as a spectrum of approaches to education. On one end there’s Mr. Rosso (Dave Gruber Allen), overly friendly, eternally supportive trusting to a fault.

On the other, you’ve got Mr. Kowchevski (Steve Bannos), deeply cynical, constantly brusque, outwardly hostile to students like Daniel. Somewhere in the middle is Coach Fredricks, who hides a sensitive heart beneath his gruffly jockish exterior. His positive meeting with Sam seems to position him as an effective combination of Kowchevski’s intelligence and Rosso’s empathy.

Besides Lindsay’s gigglefest, my favorite part of that final scene is the fact that Kowchevski, for all his bitterness and tactlessness, is 100% right about the situation. Despite his warning earlier in the episode, Lindsay did allow Daniel to charm her into helping him cheat. This episode premiered in the fall of 1999. A few years later we’d have called him a Bush administration allegory: he’s so convinced his cheating theory is right he refuses to let the fact that he has no evidence get in the way of bringing the “evildoers” to justice.

Alison, if all these Lindsay storylines are cautionary tales, is it unfair to label “Freaks and Geeks” as a somewhat conservative show? Mr. Weir is always telling kids horrifying stories about losers and junkies he knew that wound up dead or living at home into their 40s.

Though the extremity of his warnings are always played for laughs, that doesn’t make him wrong. Last week we heard a story about an aunt who doinked Ryan O’Neal and died of a drug overdose. It sounded like something Mr. Weir would say, but it actually came from Kim Kelly. At least so far, this show is hardly a celebration of the freak lifestyle.

Alison: There’s absolutely a whiff of the type of sensibility Team Apatow would later bring to their movies in these early episodes in particular, of a rough-and-tumble exterior hiding a heart of gold and some traditional values. But to be fair, we haven’t yet gotten a look at the Mathlete life Lindsay was living before, one that was clearly making her miserable. And I’d argue that Lindsay’s problems aren’t coming from her association with the freaks so much as the fact that she’s constantly going against her better judgment in order to fit in with them.

She didn’t want to help Daniel cheat, or to throw eggs, or to host a kegger at her house when her parents are out of town, but she did anyway because she was afraid to not fit in. Until she better understands that making personal compromises in order to maintain friendships mainly just makes you miserable, she’s going to keep be put in these uncomfortable situations.

It’s a good point you make about Mr. Kowchevski being absolutely right in his accusations. What I also like about the way the show handles his clash with Daniel is that, as much as we root against him, he’s not unjustified in his dislike. Daniel’s a complete snot to him, dawdling outside until he has to be herded in, then disrespecting him in front of everyone. Mr. Kowchevski’s probably seen a lot of Daniels pass through his classroom, and while his willingness to write a student off as not worth the effort isn’t the type of sentiment that wins you teacher of the year, you can understand where it comes from — whether or not Daniel would also get you killed in ‘Nam.

Daniel’s an interesting character — as you said, Matt, he’s arguably less likable at the end of the episode. And yet, in his own warped way, he was trying to be heroic and save the day in the final scene, not with a sudden aptitude at math, but with his gift of bullshit. Obviously, breaking out that champion of a “You’re tearing me apart!” speech for the second time would make it plain to Lindsay that it was a well-rehearsed emergency gambit, but it’s also the best one in Daniel’s artillery. And it’s a credit to James Franco that he makes that second, just as earnest monologue a thing of comedic beauty.

While this episode playfully tweaks the idea of the soulful, misunderstood bad boy who just needs to be saved (Daniel Desario would make an interesting study placed against “My So-Called Life”‘s similar-on-the-surface Jordan Catalano), adorable, unreliable Daniel is a tragic figure in the series. He’s someone who seems to think about identity almost as much as Lindsay does, someone struggling with too much self-awareness to always enjoy himself. Like, oddly enough, Mr. Kowchevski, Daniel seems aware that charm and cool can only take you so far.

More “Revived and Derived.”

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