“Thriller’s” Monopoly of the Dance Floor

This weekend my wife and I attended our seventh wedding of the year (I think that has to be some kind of record for us). Anyway, we had a great time visiting with friends and family, the cake was delicious (love the fruit filling), the weather was nice, but one thing irked me (as it has during the other weddings I've been to this year): When did Michael Jackson's "Thriller" become a mandatory crowd participation dance? I understand there are a gazillion YouTube videos with wedding parties doing the "Thriller" choreography to a T. There's also world record attempts and entire prison yards partaking in the ghoulishly fun activity, but if I don't know the precise moves, why should I have to leave the dance floor? (above: Clear the floor, it's time for the damn "Thriller" dance.)...

This weekend my wife and I attended our seventh wedding of the year (I think that has to be some kind of record for us). Anyway, we had a great time visiting with friends and family, the cake was delicious (love the fruit filling), the weather was nice, but one thing irked me (as it has during the other weddings I’ve been to this year):

When did Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” become a mandatory crowd participation dance?

I understand there are a gazillion YouTube videos with wedding parties doing the “Thriller” choreography to a T. There’s also world record attempts and entire prison yards partaking in the ghoulishly fun activity, but if I don’t know the precise moves, why should I have to leave the dance floor?

(above: Clear the floor, it’s time for the damn “Thriller” dance.)

At most of the weddings I have attended this year (including the latest one), when the DJ begins playing Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”–it’s almost like clockwork–a group of tweenage girls will gather in the middle of the floor, line-up, and, move-for-move, begin performing Michael Jackson’s choreography.

There’s only one problem though–they usually aren’t that good. Well, maybe I shouldn’t say they all aren’t that good. There is always one tween who is halfway decent, but the rest of her friends usually suck. There is also a handful of family and friends who are graciously quick to step off the dance floor and gaze at the girls like they’re doing something superhuman.

During one of the weddings I attended earlier this year, I continued to dance while the “Thriller” choreography ensued, but I then realized that it’s frowned upon to remain on the dance floor while a choreographed dance routine is taking place (oooooh, don’t mess with the choreographed dance routine).

As my wedding season progressed, I began to dread hearing the opening chords of “Thriller.” Not only did it kill the momentum of the party, but it also meant I had to watch a sloppy 4-minute dance routine that I wasn’t allowed to be a part of until I learned the moves myself.

“The Electric Slide,” “The Hokey Pokey,” “The Macarena,” “The Chicken Dance,” “The Love Shack,” and “Cha Cha Slide” have gained a new friend, while I have lost one (sigh). As I do with the songs mentioned above, every time I hear “Thriller” at future weddings, it will be my cue to leave the dance floor and make a trip to the bathroom or a visit to the cookie table.