Oh, for fuckssake.

By Alison Willmore on 04/12/2006

Hot off the presses:

TOM CRUISE TAKES MANHATTAN FOR FULL DAY OF "M:i:III" PREMIERES

"MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III" U.S. PREMIERE AT TRIBECA FILM FESTIVAL TO BE THE CULMINATION OF A FULL DAY OF SCREENINGS AND EVENTS

MISSION: NYC HAS CRUISE CRISSCROSSING THE CITY – BY LAND, SEA, AND AIR

APRIL 12, 2006 [New York] – Tom Cruise, the most exciting and successful action star in the world, returns to one of his signature roles, Secret Agent Ethan Hunt, in the summer’s most highly anticipated action thriller, "Mission: Impossible III" – and Cruise will celebrate the U.S. premiere of the film on May 3 at the Tribeca Film Festival with a full day of screenings and events throughout Manhattan as part of "Mission: NYC."  Bringing the film and Cruise directly to fans and filmgoers, "Mission: NYC" kicks off with Cruise appearing live on "TRL" in Times Square and culminates nearly six hours later with the U.S. premiere of the film at the Festival.

"We're thrilled that Tom Cruise is bringing 'M:i:III' to the Tribeca Film Festival and New York City," said Tribeca Film Festival co-founder Robert De Niro.

"Having the support of Tom Cruise and Paramount is a gift to us and the community," said Jane Rosenthal, co-founder of the Festival. "We are delighted to host Director J.J. Abrams, Tom and the cast as we celebrate our own mission impossible--the fifth Tribeca Film Festival in only four years."

Cruise's mission – "should he choose to accept it" – will begin at 3:30 pm at MTV's "TRL" studios in Times Square. Traveling by motorcycle, speedboat, taxicab, helicopter, sports car, and subway, Cruise will crisscross the island, making his way to premieres in Tribeca and Harlem before heading to the U.S. premiere at the Ziegfeld Theatre (141 West 54th St.), hosted in conjunction with the Tribeca Film Festival.

We don't have a Tom Cruise joke in us, but we can't be the only ones thinking the festival's lacking focus a wee bit, yes? Also, for the preceding publicity stunt to be really New York-impressive, it would have to involve Cruise "crisscrossing the island" during a transit strike. Mission: Morning Commute.

+ 2006 Tribeca Film Festival (official site)