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Spoiled Rotten

10 Rotten Movie Twists

Catch the "Too Rotten to Miss" movie Orphan tonight at 8P on IFC.

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Image Courtesy of Everett Collection

A plot twist is like a complicated haircut; impressive when done right, a disaster when incorrectly executed. In honor of Orphan‘s twist ending this Rotten Friday, we’ve compiled our favorite Rotten movies (scoring 59% or less), all served up with a twist.  Spoilers ahead.

Lucky Number Slevin (2006) 51%

Josh Hartnett’s Slevin gets caught up in a case of mistaken identity with two crime bosses: the Rabbi (Sir Ben Kingsley) and the Boss (Morgan Freeman). Bruce Willis is an assassin named Mr. Goodkat.

The Twist: Psych! In a “Kansas City Shuffle,” or a confusing double bluff, Slevin has been on a revenge mission the whole time. And guess what? Goodkat spared Slevin’s life as a child and then raised him as his own son. What you taking ’bout, Willis?


Now You See Me (2013) 49%

“The Four Horsemen” are illusionists who pull off a bank heist and shower the audience with the stolen cash. But how did they do it? FBI Investigator Dylan Rhodes (Mark Ruffalo) is on the case.

The Twist: Turns out there was a Fifth Horseman. And his name was Dylan Rhodes. Now that’s…magic?


Saw (2004) 48%

Two men wake up in a room next to a dead body. They soon realize they are victims of the Jigsaw Killer. Lessons are learned, a limb is removed.

The Twist: The dead body was really alive the whole time and is John, the Jigsaw Killer! Who Saw that coming?


Secret Window (2004) 46%

Johnny Depp plays Mort Rainey, an author who is stalked by John Shooter (John Turturro) who claims Rainey has stolen his novel. Shooter burns down Rainey’s house, kills his dog, and eventually his ex-wife.

The Twist: There is no John Shooter. Rainey has dissociative identity disorder. Shooter was just his desire to shoot his ex-wife, to SHOOT HER. Boo.


What Lies Beneath (2000) 46%

Claire Spencer (Michelle Pfeiffer) discovers that her husband, Dr. Norman Spencer (Harrison Ford) had an affair with a young woman, Madison (Amber Valletta). As Claire starts to put the pieces back together, she becomes suspicious that there is more to the story.

The Twist: Norman killed Madison and tries to kill Claire too. Claire is saved by the ghost of Madison.


The Village (2004) 43%

It’s the story of a 19th century secluded community with a big problem. There’s a creature lurking in the woods, threatening the safety of the villagers. But the elders are hiding a secret: they take turns wearing costumes to scare people into compliance. A blind villager, Ivy (Bryce Dallas Howard) is permitted to leave to get medicine.

The Twist: The village is actually set in modern times. The elders have been lying to everyone to preserve old timey traditions. So, definitely no texting.


Vanilla Sky (2001) 42%

There’s a reason science fiction romantic thrillers aren’t a thing. Tom Cruise plays David Aames, a narcissistic publisher who is badly disfigured in a car accident. Things get weird and really complicated (we’ll spare you), and he eventually jumps off a building.

The Twist: David opens his eyes, revealing that after the accident, he has been in a cryogenic sleep, living a fantasy life.


Basic (2003) 21%

John Travolta is a DEA agent who investigates the death of a feared sergeant (Samuel L. Jackson) and his Special Forces unit.

The Twist: Travolta’s character is leading a con to make everyone think his unit went rogue; nobody’s actually dead. They pretended to kill Samuel L. Jackson.


The Happening (2008) 18%

A true low point for twist-o-phile M. Night Shyamalan. Mark Wahlberg and the ever low-energy Zooey Deschanel play a couple facing a mysterious force that causes people to commit suicide.

The Twist: It’s the trees.


The Number 23 (2007) 8%

Walter Sparrow (Jim Carrey) receives a book called The Number 23. He starts obsessing over the murderous story. The book ends at chapter 22, where could 23 be?

The Twist: It’s on a hotel wall and it’s a confession of how Sparrow murdered a girl in college. He is the author of the book! Talk about a real page turner.

Catch the “Too Rotten to Miss” movie Orphan this Friday at 8P on IFC.

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New Nasty

Whips, Chains and Hand Sanitizer

Turn On The Full Season Of Neurotica At IFC's Comedy Crib

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Jenny Jaffe has a lot going on: She’s writing for Disney’s upcoming Big Hero 6: The Series, developing comedy projects with pals at Devastator Press, and she’s straddling the line between S&M and OCD as the creator and star of the sexyish new series Neurotica, which has just made its debut on IFC’s Comedy Crib. Jenny gave us some extremely intimate insight into what makes Neurotica (safely) sizzle…

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IFC: How would you describe Neurotica to a fancy network executive you met in an elevator?

Jenny: Neurotica is about a plucky Dominatrix with OCD trying to save her small-town dungeon.

IFC: How would you describe Neurotica to a drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?

Jenny: Neurotica is about a plucky Dominatrix with OCD trying to save her small-town dungeon. You’re great. We should get coffee sometime. I’m not just saying that. I know other people just say that sometimes but I really feel like we’re going to be friends, you know? Here, what’s your number, I’ll call you so you can have my number!

IFC: What’s your comedy origin story?

Jenny: Since I was a kid I’ve dealt with severe OCD and anxiety. Comedy has always been one of the ways I’ve dealt with that. I honestly just want to help make people feel happy for a few minutes at a time.

IFC: What was the genesis of Neurotica?

Jenny: I’m pretty sure it was a title-first situation. I was coming up with ideas to pitch to a production company a million years ago (this isn’t hyperbole; I am VERY old) and just wrote down “Neurotica”; then it just sort of appeared fully formed. “Neurotica? Oh it’s an over-the-top romantic comedy about a Dominatrix with OCD, of course.” And that just happened to hit the buttons of everything I’m fascinated by.

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IFC: How would you describe Ivy?

Jenny: Ivy is everything I love in a comedy character – she’s tenacious, she’s confident, she’s sweet, she’s a big wonderful weirdo.

IFC: How would Ivy’s clientele describe her?

Jenny:  Open-minded, caring, excellent aim.

IFC: Why don’t more small towns have local dungeons?

Jenny: How do you know they don’t?

IFC: What are the pros and cons of joining a chain mega dungeon?

Jenny: You can use any of their locations but you’ll always forget you have a membership and in a year you’ll be like “jeez why won’t they let me just cancel?”

IFC: Mouths are gross! Why is that?

Jenny: If you had never seen a mouth before and I was like “it’s a wet flesh cave with sharp parts that lives in your face”, it would sound like Cronenberg-ian body horror. All body parts are horrifying. I’m kind of rooting for the singularity, I’d feel way better if I was just a consciousness in a cloud.

See the whole season of Neurotica right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib.

The-Craft

The ’90s Are Back

The '90s live again during IFC's weekend marathon.

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Photo Credit: Everett Digital, Columbia Pictures

We know what you’re thinking: “Why on Earth would anyone want to reanimate the decade that gave us Haddaway, Los Del Rio, and Smash Mouth, not to mention Crystal Pepsi?”

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Thoughts like those are normal. After all, we tend to remember lasting psychological trauma more vividly than fleeting joy. But if you dig deep, you’ll rediscover that the ’90s gave us so much to fondly revisit. Consider the four pillars of true ’90s culture.

Boy Bands

We all pretended to hate them, but watch us come alive at a karaoke bar when “I Want It That Way” comes on. Arguably more influential than Brit Pop and Grunge put together, because hello – Justin Timberlake. He’s a legitimate cultural gem.

Man-Child Movies

Adam Sandler is just behind The Simpsons in terms of his influence on humor. Somehow his man-child schtick didn’t get old until the aughts, and his success in that arena ushered in a wave of other man-child movies from fellow ’90s comedians. RIP Chris Farley (and WTF Rob Schneider).

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Teen Angst

In horror, dramas, comedies, and everything in between: Troubled teens! Getting into trouble! Who couldn’t relate to their First World problems, plaid flannels, and lose grasp of the internet?

Mainstream Nihilism

From the Coen Bros to Fincher to Tarantino, filmmakers on the verge of explosive popularity seemed interested in one thing: mind f*cking their audiences by putting characters in situations (and plot lines) beyond anyone’s control.

Feeling better about that walk down memory lane? Good. Enjoy the revival.

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And revisit some important ’90s classics all this weekend during IFC’s ’90s Marathon. Check out the full schedule here.

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Get Physical

DVDs are the new Vinyl

Portlandia Season 7 Now Available On Disc.

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In this crazy digital age, sometimes all we really want is to reach out and touch something. Maybe that’s why so many of us are still gung-ho about owning stuff on DVD. It’s tangible. It’s real. It’s tech from a bygone era that still feels relevant, yet also kitschy and retro. It’s basically vinyl for people born after 1990.

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Inevitably we all have that friend whose love of the disc is so absolutely repellent that he makes the technology less appealing. “The resolution, man. The colors. You can’t get latitude like that on a download.” Go to hell, Tim.

Yes, Tim sucks, and you don’t want to be like Tim, but maybe he’s onto something and DVD is still the future. Here are some benefits that go beyond touch.

It’s Decor and Decorum

With DVDs and a handsome bookshelf you can show off your great taste in film and television without showing off your search history. Good for first dates, dinner parties, family reunions, etc.

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Forget Public Wifi

Warm up that optical drive. No more awkwardly streaming episodes on shady free wifi!

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Inter-not

Internet service goes down. It happens all the time. It could happen right now. Then what? Without a DVD on hand you’ll be forced to make eye contact with your friends and family. Or worse – conversation.

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Self Defense

You can’t throw a download like a ninja star. Think about it.

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If you’d like to experience the benefits DVD ownership yourself, Portlandia Season 7 is now available on DVD and Blue-Ray.