Speed Keanu Reeves

Speed Round

10 Things You Didn’t Know About the Speed Movies

Strap in for Speed and Speed 2: Cruise Control this Friday, September 9th starting at 5:30P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: 20th Century Fox Film Corp. All rights reserved

Starring Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock as a cop and a civilian who “meet cute” on a bus wired to explode should it drop below 50MPH, Speed is an eminently rewatchable, high-octane thrill ride. Its followup, Speed 2: Cruise Control, starring a well-meaning Bullock and Jason Patric (subbing in for Keanu) as maritime quality-control specialists, pulls a 3% on Rotten Tomatoes. (The sequel’s “rotten” status earns it a place in IFC and Rotten Tomatoes’ Rotten Fridays.)

Before you dive into a Speed double feature this Friday starting at 5:30P, check out some things you might not have known about the Speed movies.

1. Joss Whedon Put Words in Keanu’s Mouth.

Yes, the mastermind behind Buffy, Firefly and The Avengers penned most of the dialogue in Speed, according to the film’s credited screenwriter Graham Yost. Although the story was originally conceived by Yost, Joss Whedon stepped in as script doctor and punched up the action movie one-liners we all know and quote today.


2. The Bus Jump Would Have Ended Badly in Real Life.

Suspension of disbelief be damned: The bus jump in Speed is one of the greatest stunts in popcorn movie history. Never mind the fact that the vehicle’s drivetrain would’ve been completely demolished upon impact, the bomb would’ve been triggered before they hit the ground. On a rear-wheel drive bus, the speedometer is connected to the front wheels, which would slow their rotation in mid-air. And since the wheels don’t measure wind speed, it wouldn’t matter how fast our heroes are soaring — the wheels say below 50!


3. A Special Bus Was Made to Survive the Jump.

Obviously, your average everyday bus isn’t built for acrobatics, so the filmmakers built a special jumpable bus with souped-up shock absorbers to soften the massive impact. (A ramp was built to give the bus extra lift.) And for added precaution for the certifiably insane stunt driver, the driver seat was moved back 15 feet and secured with a floor-to-ceiling stabilizer to prevent the likelihood of spinal compression. So in the movie, hypothetically, if the bus stuck the landing without triggering the bomb, everybody inside would be out of high-octane commission. Still, whatta stunt!


4. Speed originally took place entirely on a bus.

In Graham Yost’s original version of the script, the movie ends as soon as the bus ride does. No nail-biting elevator drop, no edge-of-your-seat subway brawl, and heck, even the jump wasn’t in the original script! (Yost added it when director Jan de Bont noticed an incomplete section of Interstate 105.) But in a shockingly good decision for a major movie studio, Fox requested that Yost put in more action that didn’t involve public transportation. Yost met them halfway with the subway sequence.


5. The “Die Hard on a Bus” Jokes Are Apt.

Comparing Speed to the greatest action movie of all time might be cruel, but it’s accurate. The script was written with the Die Hard franchise in mind and was originally offered to director John McTiernan, who ironically passed due to the story’s resemblance to the John McClane classic. Jan de Bont — who served as director of photography on Die Hard and other action blockbusters — took the job, which helped launch his directing career.


6. The Elevator Scene Was Based on a Real Incident.

Another memorable action sequence was the opening elevator rescue. Jan De Bont suggested adding the scene after his experience being trapped in an elevator during the making of Die Hard. (Too bad John McClane wasn’t around to save him.) De Bont and the crew constructed an 80-foot model elevator shaft for the sequence. Yippie kay yay, indeed.


7. Roger Ebert Was Forced to Defend His “Thumbs Up” Review of Speed 2.

Sequels don’t often fare too well with critics, and for Speed 2currently standing at 3% on Rotten Tomatoes — that would be putting it mildly. The movie was eviscerated by critics except for two notable holdouts: Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert, who both gave Speed 2 a positive review. Ebert even admitted that he had to defend this review more than any other and that it was used as evidence by detractors of his poor cinematic judgment. (Not for nothing: Sandra Bullock confessed in a 2000 interview that it was “the biggest piece of crap ever made.”)


8. Speed 2 Almost Took Place on a Plane.

Despite Keanu passing on a sequel to make The Devil’s Advocate and Jan de Bont insisting that the concept only worked once, Speed 2 was immediately greenlit thanks to the success of its predecessor. Many potential vehicles were proposed for stars Jason Patric and Sandra Bullock to be trapped on, including Graham Yost’s idea about a plane flying through the Andes Mountains that would explode if it ascended above 10,000 feet. A cruise ship was eventually chosen, based on a recurring dream Jan de Bont had about being trapped on a ship that crashed into an island. New screenwriters Jeff Nathanson and Randall McCormick were brought on board to bring De Bont’s literal nightmare to life.


9. Two Stunts in Speed 2 Nearly Killed the Leads.

After Keanu declined to appear in the sequel, actor Jason Patric signed on as Sandra’s first mate. And although the film’s stunt coordinator was impressed by Patric’s physical ability, the actor nearly killed himself during a motorcycle stunt where he fell from a bike while 30 feet in the air. Bullock said Patric was lucky to survive the stunt, but she also had a close call herself: While shooting in the ocean, she had to be rescued by Patric from almost being decapitated by the ship’s rudder. (One stunt woman didn’t manage to escape injury on set: She was hit in the face by a boat cable and required reconstructive surgery.)


10. Three Characters Return for Speed 2, And a Fourth You Might’ve Missed.

Obviously Sandra’s back, and we have Joe Morton as Mac and Glenn Plummer as Maurice, or Tuneman as he’s better known. But there’s one more hapless character to undergo a crisis in both movies: Constance. Who? In Speed, actress Susan Barnes plays the nervous female executive trapped in the elevator and frozen in fear. In Speed 2, she’s back as the cooler-headed Constance who casually sits and smokes as chaos ensues. Apparently, her brush with death in ’94 turned Constance into a cool action movie character.

Set sail with Speed 2: Cruise Control during IFC’s Rotten Fridays! 

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SAG Life

Rappers Act Up

Watch the Yo! IFC Acts Movie Marathon Memorial Day Weekend.

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Photo Credit: Courtesy of the Everett Collection and the '90s)

Memorial Day weekend: how to celebrate? Nothing quite says “screw spring—let’s do summer” like blockbuster movies starring rappers who ditched lucrative music careers in order to become actors. It happened a lot, remember? Especially in and around the ’90s. Will Smith, Eminem, Ice Cube, Ice-T, Marky Mark Wahlberg, Ludacris…icons with the hubris to try the silver screen instead and have it totally work out.

But what if more rappers had made the leap? That’s a rhetorical question—movies (and life) would’ve been better, obviously. To prove it, here are some movies that totally would’ve been more memorable with rappers.

The Godfather

Starring Biggie, not Brando.
Godfather-BIG

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Only Coolio could improve upon Gene Wilder’s performance.
Coolio-Wonka

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Billy Elliot, with a dose of Missy Elliott.
Missy-Billy-Elliott

Robin Hood: Price of Thieves

Low hanging fruit, Hollywood.
Robin-Hood-and-Lil-Jon

And of course…

Kanye-of-The-Lambs

See NONE of those movies and a whole bunch of real ones this Memorial Day weekend on IFC’s rapper-filled movie marathon.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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