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Rotten Finale

5 Reasons Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult Is Too Rotten to Miss

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The Naked Gun movies are a lot like sex — a guilty pleasure that brings a smile to your face, before inevitably ending in a bunch of lousy reviews. And the third installment, Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult, may have been good for a laugh, but compared to the classic that was The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!, it was an inauspicious way to go out. (55% on Rotten Tomatoes. Yikes!)

With IFC and Rotten Tomatoes teaming up to celebrate movies too rotten to miss, we thought we’d look back at this rotten triquel, and figure out why such a lousy movie still makes us laugh so hard.

5. Weirdest Collection of Cameos in Movie History

Racquel Welch
Paramount Pictures

Can you name another movie with Shannen Doherty AND Florence Henderson? How about “Weird Al” Yankovic AND James Earl Jones? Elliott Gould AND Vanna White? Any movie that squeezes in Olympia Dukakis, Morgan Fairchild, Mary Lou Retton, Raquel Welch and Ann B. Davis as “Alice” from The Brady Bunch, and still has room for a legitimately funny bit with Pia Zadora, has to be doing something right.


4. Anna Nicole Smith In Her Biggest Role Ever

Anna Nicole Smith
Paramount Pictures

Anna Nicole Smith was known for a lot of things. Marrying ancient billionaires. Starring on a short-lived reality show. But right at the peak of her tabloid notoriety, she got her one shot at a legitimate acting role, thanks to The Naked Gun franchise, and she did, er, okay? Still, you can’t deny she draws your eyes to her, um, talents. Watching her in Naked Gun 33 1/3 is a flashback to a simpler time, when her biggest tragedy was earning a Razzie nomination for Worst New Star.


3. A Reminder of the days when O.J. Simpson Was a Movie Star

OJ Naked Gun
Paramount Pictures

Not to be outdone by the former Playmate of the Year, O.J. Simpson took home a Razzie nomination for Worst Supporting Actor in 1994. Granted, that may have had something to do with the fact that he was on trial for double homicide right after the movie came out. After all we’ve learned about the rampaging running back in the years since The Naked Gun movies, it certainly adds a whole new dimension to his performance as hapless police officer Nordberg, who never seemed to catch a break. Guess he was saving up all that karma for the trial of the century.


2. An Untouchable Untouchables Parody

No one can deny that even by the franchise’s standards, Naked Gun 33 1/3 is an uneven movie. The Zucker Brothers (Airplane!) went back to the well one too many times, and most of the jokes had been used up. Thankfully, there were a few bits designed for earlier movies that were cut due to time or budgetary concerns, and could be plucked from the trash heap and reworked. That’s how the filmmakers ended up with a legitimately clever parody of the classic train shootout from The Untouchables, which in itself was a homage to the “Odessa Steps” scene in Sergei Eisenstein’s famous 1925 silent movie Battleship Potemkin. So, if you’re in the mood for a heady send-up of the inventor of the montage, well, maybe this Leslie Nielsen joint is for you.


1. So Many Dumb Jokes That Make Us Laugh

Sure, this film franchise may have been running on fumes, but if you breathe enough fumes, you’re likely to laugh hysterically. This is far from the best Naked Gun movie, but when you spit out a joke a second, you’re bound to hit a few of them out of the park. The quotes! (“Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes.” “I like my sex the way I play basketball, one on one with as little dribbling as possible.”) The sperm bank scene! (Watch it above.) Rotten or not, Naked Gun 33 1/3 is still pretty chuckle-worthy.

Strap in for puns and pratfalls when Rotten Fridays kicks off Friday, August 12th starting at 8P!

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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Breaking News

From Canada With Love

Baroness von Sketch Show comes to IFC.

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Breaking news that (finally) isn’t apocalyptic!

IFC announced today that it acquired acclaimed Canadian comedy series Baroness von Sketch Show, slated to make its US of A premiere this summer. And yes, it’s important to note that it’s a Canadian sketch comedy series, because Canada is currently a shining beacon of civilization in the western hemisphere, and Baroness von Sketch Show reflects that light in every way possible.

The series is fronted entirely by women, which isn’t unusual in the sketch comedy world but is quite rare in the televised sketch comedy world. Punchy, smart, and provocative, each episode of Baroness von Sketch Show touches upon outrageous-yet-relatable real world subjects in ways both unexpected and deeply satisfying: soccer moms, awkward office birthday parties, being over 40 in a gym locker room…dry shampoo…

Indiewire called it “The Best Comedy You’ve Never Seen” and The National Post said that it’s “the funniest thing on Canadian television since Kids In The Hall.” And that’s saying a lot, because Canadians are goddamn hilarious.

Get a good taste of BVSS in the following sketch, which envisions a future Global Summit run entirely by women. It’s a future we’re personally ready for.

Baroness Von Sketch Show premieres later this summer on IFC.

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