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There’s Something About Mary

Down Boy

8 Bad Movie Dogs Who Need a Serious Shaming

Celebrate National Puppy Day with Cujo on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Stephen King’s monstrous St. Bernard Cujo is rabidly bad, as in he literally has rabies and is out to kill anything in his path. But as anyone who has ever come home to a shredded sofa, cleaned up dog vomit, or had their leg aggressively humped can tell you, there are many ways for a dog to be bad. To celebrate IFC airing Cujo for National Puppy Day, here are 10 of the baddest dogs ever to appear on a movie screen.

1. Beethoven

A decade after Cujo came this definitely friendlier St. Bernard who still managed to be almost as destructive. And the trail of wreckage Beethoven left is unbelievably long, covering 8 films over two decades…and counting. Chris, the original dog that played Beethoven, died after the second movie but the franchise was too lucrative to be put down. By the sixth installment of the Beethoven series, the storyline was rebooted to show Beethoven as a canine movie star. And along the way this dog was responsible for more property damage than any movie creature this side of Godzilla.


2. Puffy from There’s Something About Mary

The scene from There’s Something About Mary where Ben Stiller is attacked by Mary’s dog Puffy (played by a dog with the appropriate name of Slammer) is every bit as terrifying as the attacks in Cujo. Puffy more than gets comeuppance, however, and memorably ends up in a full body cast. The real Slammer was actually put in a fake full body cast for the scene, but only for about 10 seconds.


3. The Terror Dogs from Ghostbusters

“OK, who brought the dog?,” Rick Moranis asks in a scene from the original Ghostbusters right before a hell hound crashes into the room. The “dog” is actually one of a pair of demonic entities known as Zuul and Vinz Clortho. They are the Gatekeeper and the Key Master who take over the bodies of humans, and whose ritual mating turns them into horrific dog-like beasts who usher in the Sumerian god Gozer to destroy the world. That’s not the kind of misbehavior that even the Dog Whisperer can easily fix.


4. Hooch from Turner & Hooch

Hooch may have been a handful, but this bad dog was on the right side of the law. He teamed up with Tom Hanks as Turner to take a bite out of crime. The real Hooch was a Dogue de Bordeaux (which is probably French for “slobber fountain”) named Beasley. In the movie he destroyed everything Turner owned, and generated enough drool to drown the bad guys. You may be tempted to think the worst thing Hooch did was to inspire a bunch of weaker “man and dog” crime fighting movies like K-9 and Top Dog, but Turner & Hooch was actually released three months after Jim Belushi’s much more poorly received pairing with a German Shepherd.


5. Killer from Half Baked

OK, the dog Killer from the stoner classic Half Baked wasn’t really a bad dog — he just hung out with the wrong crowd. And when they turned him on to some “killer” (whoa!) weed, he ends up flying…literally. But the best part of the movie is Jim Breuer’s way-too-stoned recounting of the life and times of Killer, from his birth to a “3-legged bitch” to his later drug abuse problems. Just say “No” to drugs, doggies.


6. Milo from The Mask

Milo, the mild mannered dog of mild-mannered Stanley Ipkiss (Jim Carrey) is played by a Jack Russell terrier named Max. But when Milo dons the Mask of Loki he becomes an unholy green-faced terror, much like a canine version of what happens to Stanley. This was Max the dog’s first movie role, and some of the scenes featured Jim Carrey improvising to Max’s deviations from the script, such as when he refuses to give up a Frisbee or is unable to climb a wall to the cell where Stanley is imprisoned.


7. Zoltan, Hound of Dracula

You want to talk about a bad dog? How about Dracula’s Dog, returned after centuries of slumber to walk the Earth? He’ll turn you into a vampire AND dig up the flower garden. But at least you can teach him to roll over and play undead. This 1978 abomination is perhaps the unintentionally funniest movie on this list– it actually features a vampire puppy in what is undoubtedly the cutest moment in horror movie history.


8. Baxter, the world’s most evil dog

The murderous bull terrier from the 1989 French black comedy/psychological thriller Baxter is not merely a bad dog. In what is one of the strangest movies ever made, Baxter is a brooding, complex, and multi-layered sociopathic villain. The fact that the dog narrates his own tale (in French with subtitles!) only makes the whole thing more bizarre. This is what would happen if Cujo was directed by Luis Bunuel after a week-long absinthe binge. Imagine American Psycho with a French dog and you’ll understand why John Waters called this one of his favorite movies.

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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