Jennifer Aniston Matthew Perry Windows

Retro Flashback

10 Helpful Instructional Videos From the ’80s and ’90s

Learn how to host a talk show tonight on Comedy Bang! Bang! starting at 11P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: YouTube

This week on Comedy Bang! Bang!, Scott Aukerman and Kid Cudi spoof ’80s instructional videos with their “How to Host a Talk Show” primer. (Even Reggie Watts gets in on the action with his “How to Band Lead” music video.) Grab your Crystal Pepsi and join us for a look back at the heyday of cheesy corporate instructional videos.

10. Grill Skill Burger Rap

It’s a shame that “meat’s got grain to it just like wood” never joined “Baby Got Back” or “Mo Money, Mo Problems” in the hip hop lexicon.

9. 1991 Nintendo Training Video

We’re not sure what “Generic ’90s Business Guy” actually did to that filthy NES system, but we’re kind of on the store clerk’s side with this one.

8. Wendy’s Cold Drinks Rap

Less of a rap and more akin to whatever Debbie Harry was doing in the Blondie song “Rapture,” this musical ode to the most efficient and cost effective way to serve cold drinks is still pretty catchy. Remember to always use the scoop to fill the cup with ice unless you want to be out of work faster than a protagonist in a Bruce Springsteen song.

7. 1990 Blockbuster training video with Buster Sales

With his cool tie and no-nonsense attitude, “Buster Sales” was the Blockbuster employee training video answer to Bart Simpson. Though there’s a good chance he exists entirely in the mind of the bored clerk in the video.

6. Windows 95 Instruction Guide with Jennifer Aniston and Matthew Perry

Remember when Microsoft enlisted Friends stars Matthew Perry and Jennifer Aniston to help explain all the radical stuff you could do with the hot new Windows ’95? Could this beeeee any more ’90s?

5. Chili Can Be Served With Cheese

The Wendy’s corporate training video production team really had all their bases covered. In case an employee forgets that you should always stir chili in a figure-eight motion, all they need to do is remember this catchy song.

4. Blockbuster’s Siskel & Ebert spoof

Critics Driscoll and Egbert review films like “Beaverton Hills Cop IV” and a black-and-white French arthouse flick directed by Francois Faux-Pas, all of which conveniently take place in Blockbuster Video stores. But it’s the staff’s commitment to customer service that really gets the thumbs up from the duo.

Things take a decidedly weird turn in part 2, where Egbert and Driscoll review a coming-of-age tale about a young boy who discovers classic cinema while creepily flirting with an adult Blockbuster employee.

3. Don’t Copy That Floppy

Thanks to this helpful rap, the kid in this video won’t be guilty of software piracy. But he is guilty of having awesome ’90s hair.

2. Kid’s Guide to the Internet

Don’t get mixed up in all that “cybernet” stuff, kids.

1. Wendy’s Hot Drinks Song

Proper beverage handling and serving guidelines have never been this funky. (Check out Reggie Watts’ take on this viral classic.)

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Documentary Now! Robert Evans Mansion

The Reel Deal

Everything You Need To Know About “Mr. Runner Up” Inspiration Robert Evans

Watch the two-part finale of Documentary Now! this Wednesday at 10P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

In its upcoming two-part finale, Documentary Now! spoofs the crown jewel of docs: The Kid Stays In The Picture. It’s the autobiographical documentary about Robert Evans, the unlikely Hollywood mogul whose mix of self-aggrandizing bravado, classic good looks and extremely circumstantial good luck took him from being a salesman to an actor to the head of Paramount Pictures.

If you’ve never seen the film, it’s totally worth it. Rotten Tomatoes agrees, with a staggeringly-high approval rating. Watch it before, or watch it after — doesn’t matter. You’ll appreciate it whenever.

In the meantime, here’s a bit of background that will come in handy…

Robert Loves Robert

Robert Evans desk

USA Films/Everett Collection

Robert Evans is the ultimate Robert Evans fan. The movie was narrated by Robert Evans and based on his memoir of the same name. It is totally unbiased.

He’s Kind Of A Big Deal

Robert Evans, Chinatown
Paramount Pictures

Evans produced some of Hollywood’s true classics: Chinatown, Rosemary’s Baby, The Godfather, Love Story…the list goes on. Totally legit and amazing movies.

He’s Also Kind Of A Joke

Wag The Dog
New Line Cinema

Evans has been parodied in TV shows and movies like Entourage and Wag The Dog. He is the quintessential “producer” you already have in your head.

So Wrong He’s Right

Robert Evans Slap
20th Century Film Corp

Robert Evans is a notorious narcissist whose love of self is so blind and sincere that it’s actually adorable.

There’s Something Missing

via Giphy

Entire sections of Robert Evans’ life are left out of the documentary. Maybe it’s because of timing. Maybe it’s because real life isn’t a tidy narrative. Who knows.

He Blew It

Spider coke

Evans had a pretty spectacular fall from grace. He was convicted of cocaine trafficking in the early 80’s, and was connected to a contract killing during the production of The Cotton Club. Oops.

Losing Is For Losers

Everett Collection
Everett Collection

In the Robert Evans mythology, all tragedies are just triumphs in disguise, and every story has a happy ending…for Robert Evans.

Bill Hader Jerry Wallach

With these simple facts in hand you are now prepared to thoroughly enjoy the two-part finale of Documentary Now! starting this Wednesday at 10/9c on IFC.

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Weird Roles

Anthony Michael Hall’s Most Rotten Movies

Catch Anthony Michael Hall in Weird Science on Friday at 8P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Universal/Everett Collection

Anthony Michael Hall was the quintessential ’80s nerd. We love him in classics like The Breakfast Club and National Lampoon’s Vacation. But even the brainiest among us has his weak spots. In honor of Weird Science airing this Rotten Friday, we analyze Hall’s worst movies.

Weird Science (1985) 56%

A low point for John Hughes, Weird Science is way too wacky for its own good. Anthony Michael Hall’s Gary and his pal Wyatt (Ilan Mitchell-Smith) create the “perfect woman.” Supernatural chaos ensues. The film costars a young Bill Paxton, floppy disks, and a general disconnect from all reality.

The Caveman’s Valentine (2001) 46%

This ambitious drama starring Samuel L. Jackson couldn’t live up to its rich premise. Jackson plays Romulus, a Juilliard-educated, paranoid schizophrenic who lives in a cave. Hall co-stars as Bob, a rich man, who wants to see Romulus play the piano. The plot centers around Romulus investigating a murder, but with so much going on, the movie never quite finds its rhythm.

All About the Benjamins (2002) 30%

Ice Cube plays a bounty hunter who teams up with Mike Epps’ con man to catch diamond thieves. Hall plays Lil J, a small-time drug dealer. It’s definitely a role we’ve never seen Hall in, but overall the movie isn’t funny or original enough to justify its violence.

Freddy Got Fingered (2001) 11%

This showcase for Tom Green’s goofy gross-out comedy is often hailed as one of the worst films of all time. Green plays Gord, a 20-something slacker, who dreams of having his own animated series. Hall is Dave Davidson, a CEO of an animation studio who eventually helps Gord find success. Too bad Tom Green wasn’t so lucky.

Johnny Be Good (1988) 0%

Hall plays against type as Johnny Walker, a star quarterback. Robert Downey Jr. is his best friend and Uma Thurman plays his devoted girlfriend. Despite the support of a future A-list cast, the movie lacks central conflict and charm. Or, as TV Guide put it, “Johnny be worthless.” Ouch.

Catch the “Too Rotten to Miss” Weird Science this Friday at 8P on IFC.

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Season 6: Episode 1: Pickathon

Binge Fest

Portlandia Season 6 Now Available On DVD

The perfect addition to your locally-sourced, artisanal DVD collection.

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End of summer got you feeling like:

Portlandia Toni Screaming GIF

Ease into fall with Portlandia‘s sixth season. Relive the latest exploits of Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein’s cast of characters, including Doug and Claire’s poignant breakup, Lance’s foray into intellectual society, and the terrifying rampage of a tsukemen Noodle Monster! Plus, guest stars The Flaming Lips, Glenn Danzig, Louis C.K., Kevin Corrigan, Zoë Kravitz, and more stop by to experience what Portlandia is all about.

Pick up a copy of the DVD today, or watch full episodes and series extras now on and the IFC app.

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