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Boo-yah

The 10 Scariest Moments From the Halloween Movies

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Mike Myers, the iconic killer from the Halloween movies, has been terrorizing us since 1978, and there have been enough horrifying moments to last us a lifetime.

With the 2007 Halloween remake airing as part of IFC’s Friday Night Frights, we’re reminiscing about some of the franchise’s more terrifying moments. Turn on all the lights and make sure you have an extra change of underwear on hand as we rundown some of the scariest moments to ever come out of the Halloween movies.

1. Karen’s Jacuzzi Death, Halloween II 

Oh, Karen. Don’t you know you’re not supposed to go off and have a romantic jacuzzi soak with your BF when you’re supposed to be looking after your patients? Unlucky for you, Myers was there to remind you.


2. Annie’s Backseat Strangulation, Halloween

If only Annie had checked in the backseat of her car in case some maniac was waiting to strangle her from behind. But that didn’t happen, and now we all are cursed to double check our cars before driving alone at night.


3. The Death of Nurse Daniels, Halloween II (2009)

The death of Nurse Daniels, played by Octavia Spencer, may not be the most creative of Myers’ kills, but it was one of the most brutal ways to go. She never gave up the will to live as she attempted to drag her bloodied body across the floor, but safety never came.


4. The Death of Bob Simms, Halloween

It’s not the pop out from the door to the right. It’s not the knife straight through Robert’s body and into the wall. It’s not the spooky shadows or the ghostly cracked-open door. It’s the underlying anticipation! We know it’s only a matter of time before Robert was hacked and slashed, but the suspense is killer.


5. Lynda van der Klok Meets Michael Myers, Halloween

If you want to stay alive in a horror movie, you must follow the fundamental rule — if you want to live, keep it in your pants. After Myers stabs her boo Bob, he comes for Lynda dressed underneath a white sheet and wearing Bob’s glasses. Michael Myers is the ultimate spokesman for abstinence.


6. Michael Chases Laurie, Halloween

Mike Myers practically invented the chase scene in horror movies. The killer takes his time while his victims frantically run around looking for a way out or a safe place to hide. Myers chasing Jamie Lee Curtis in the original Halloween still holds up to its infamy today.


7. Jamie Lloyd Meets a Corn Thresher, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers 

There’s nothing scarier than seeing a real-life bogeyman, but that was little Jamie Lloyd’s cross to bear. After being terrorized by her uncle as a child, Jamie grew up to be terrorized some more, and she finally met her end after Myers cornered her in a farm house. The Halloween killer has executed some pretty creative kills throughout his legacy, but throwing his niece in a corn thresher is tops.


8. John Strode’s Face Gets Melted Off, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers 

Raiders of the Lost Ark melted the faces off the baddies, and Halloween did more or less the same thing with poor John Strode. After getting tossed like a rag doll onto dangerous electrical circuits, Strode was not offered a quick and painless death.


9. Deadly Jaywalking, Halloween II 

There’s a price to pay for dressing up like Mike Myers. The price is death by fire. Ben Tramer of Halloween II ran away from the cops, and in the heat of the moment failed to look both ways before crossing the street. If it wasn’t the impact of the oncoming car that killed him, the fiery explosion sure did.


10. Product Testing, Halloween III: Season of the Witch

Mike Myers wasn’t in the third Halloween movie, subtitled Season of the Witch, but this death is still just as disturbing. When Joe Kupfer and his family go to the Silver Shamrock Novelties factory, poor little Buddy is the first to go — and in one of the most creepy ways possible. The fall to the ground isn’t scary, but the bugs and snakes oozing from his face (or wherever!) still haunts our nightmares.

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Flame Out

Brockmire and Other Public Implosions

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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There’s less than a month until the Brockmire premiere, and to say we’re excited would be an insulting understatement. It’s not just that it stars Hank Azaria, who can do no wrong (and yes, that’s including Mystery Men, which is only cringeworthy because of Smash Mouth). It’s that the whole backstory of the titular character, Jim Brockmire, is the stuff of legends. A one-time iconic sportscaster who won the hearts of fans and players alike, he fell from grace after an unfortunate personal event triggered a seriously public meltdown. See for yourself in the NSFW Funny or Die digital short that spawned the IFC series:

See? NSFW and spectacularly catastrophic in a way that could almost be real. Which got us thinking: What are some real-life sports fails that have nothing to do with botched athletics and everything to do with going tragically off script? The internet is a dark and dirty place, friends, but these three examples are pretty special and mostly safe for work…

Disgruntled Sports Reporter

His co-anchor went offsides and he called it like he saw it.

Jim Rome vs Jim “Not Chris” Everett

You just don’t heckle a professional athlete when you’re within striking distance. Common sense.

Carl Lewis’s National Anthem

He killed it! As in murdered. It’s dead.

To see more moments just like these, we recommend spending a day in your pajamas combing through the muckiness of the internet. But to see something that’s Brockmire-level funny without having to clear your browser history, check out the sneak peeks and extras here.

Don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Mirror, Mirror

Portlandia Season 7 In Hindsight

Portlandia Season 7 Now Available Online and on the IFC App.

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Another season of Portlandia is behind us, and oh what a season it was. We laughed. We cried. And we chuckled uncomfortably while glancing nervously around the room. Like every season before it, the latest Portlandia has held a mirror up to ridiculousness of modern American life, but more than ever that same mirror has reflected our social reality in ways that are at once hysterical and sneakily thought-provoking. Here are just a few of the issues they tackled:

Nationalism

So long, America, Portland is out! And yes, the idea of Portland seceding is still less ludicrous than building a wall.

Men’s Rights

We all saw this coming. Exit gracefully, dudes.

Protests

Whatever you stand for, stand for it together. Or with at least one other person.

Free Love

No matter who we are or how we love, deep down we all have the ability to get stalky.

Social Status

Modern self-esteem basically hinges on likes, so this isn’t really a stretch at all.

These moments are just the tip of the iceberg, and much more can be found in the full seventh season of #Portlandia, available right now #online and on the #IFC app.

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Spirit's Up

You Missed It, But Don’t Panic

Watch the 2017 Spirit Awards Right Now on the IFC App.

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The 2017 Independent Spirit Awards are over! Done! See you next year!
Moonlight won every award for which it was nominated, The Witch got some well-deserved rookie love, Nick Kroll & John Mulaney were perfect hosts, and Fred Armisen apparently died.

If you missed any of it, don’t freak. It’s 2017, which is the future. The magical immediacy of media technology will save you.

Watch the entire awards show, start to finish, on the IFC app or right here. RIGHT NOW. FOR FREE. Or, you know, whenever, because that’s the whole point.

If you’re still on the fence, don’t get comfortable. Here’s a sampler platter that’ll give you the flavor of everything that went down today. Fair warning: It’s real good.

Nick Kroll and John Mulaney

Perfect hosts. Perfect. Their opening routine was deadly funny, wicked smart, and invoked both David Lynch and Werner Herzog. A huge step up from the Academy Awards’ usual fart jokes, figuratively speaking.

Andy Samberg’s Surprise Cameo

We’ll never think of Eddie Vedder the same way again.

Best Supporting Female: Molly Shannon

Superstar! It’s been too easy to think of Molly exclusively in the context of her beloved characters, but her nuanced performance in Other People changes all of that. And man can she work a crowd.

Best Feature: Moonlight

This. Movie. We called it first, Oscar!

See the full list of winners here and enjoy the entire 2017 Spirit Awards now or anytime on IFC.com and the IFC app.

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