DID YOU READ

The 10 Most Nicolas Cage Moments Ever

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Nicolas Cage isn’t just the star of National Treasure, he is one. Much like the bemulleted Superman he nearly played, Cage has the feeling of an alien among us, trying to act human, but never quite getting it right.

Here is a man who sleeps in Dracula’s castle for fun, collects dinosaur skulls and has built a pyramid to spend eternity in. (Oh, and he might be a time traveler/immortal vampire.) You get the feeling that he rolls out of bed already at 11, and just ramps it up from there.

Here are a few moments that truly encapsulate all that is Nicolas Cage. Moments that can only compare to staring at the sun itself, if the sun starred in a bunch of mediocre genre films. So let yourself be blinded by his majesty below, but be warned, much like Mr. Cage himself, these clips can be NSFW.

10. National Treasure: Book of Secrets

It’s easy to watch this scene, and assume Nic Cage was told this was a romcom, and that he was supposed to act like he was on a typical date.


9. Deadfall

This performance is like if Cloud Atlas had sex with a pile of cocaine. It’s utter madness. This is genuine, uncut Cage right here, people. Street value, priceless.


8. Vampire’s Kiss

This movie is legendary for the lengths Cage went to in order to give an authentic performance as a vampire. He famously ate a live cockroach during filming, for instance. We’re not sure if he fully understood that vampires aren’t real, and we’re glad no one thought to tell him.


 7. Matchstick Men

Matchstick Men is one of those odd movies that knows how to channel full-blown Cage in a productive direction. That usually involves him playing an insane person, but the results are nothing short of spectacular.


6. Ghost Rider

You kind of get the feeling that this is just how Cage enters a room. Screaming, while catching on fire, with a 50 percent chance his face will burn off.


5. Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans

The odd thing about Nic Cage smoking crack in a movie is that it doesn’t really do much to change his performance. Now if crack ended up smoking Nic Cage, that’s something we’d like to see.


4. Face/Off

This, ladies and gentlemen, is how you begin a movie. First, every movie should start with Nicolas Cage. That’s a given. Then, ideally, have him in some religious garb, for the appropriate amount of sacrilege. Then have him furiously dance, overact, and grope women. Frankly, what more do you need?


3. Adaptation 

Cage gives a brilliantly unhinged performance as writer Charlie Kaufman and his twin brother Donald. Only Nic Cage could convey the literal struggle between a writer and his inner hack.


2. The Michael McIntyre Chat Show

And of course, Nic Cage isn’t just insane on the big screen. Here he is walking onto a talk show, while stripping, throwing cash at the crowd, and performing a cross between karate and Elvis moves. If his head burst into a flaming skull, it could not be any more weird.


1. The Wicker Man

Punching old women? Bear suits? Bees? A bizarre belief that this was a real movie, and not some inside joke with the universe? It doesn’t get more bat sh*t crazy then this Nicolas Cage classic.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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Breaking News

From Canada With Love

Baroness von Sketch Show premieres this summer on IFC.

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Breaking news that (finally) isn’t apocalyptic!

IFC announced today that it acquired acclaimed Canadian comedy series Baroness von Sketch Show, slated to make its US of A premiere this summer. And yes, it’s important to note that it’s a Canadian sketch comedy series, because Canada is currently a shining beacon of civilization in the western hemisphere, and Baroness von Sketch Show reflects that light in every way possible.

The series is fronted entirely by women, which isn’t unusual in the sketch comedy world but is quite rare in the televised sketch comedy world. Punchy, smart, and provocative, each episode of Baroness von Sketch Show touches upon outrageous-yet-relatable real world subjects in ways both unexpected and deeply satisfying: soccer moms, awkward office birthday parties, being over 40 in a gym locker room…dry shampoo…

Indiewire called it “The Best Comedy You’ve Never Seen” and The National Post said that it’s “the funniest thing on Canadian television since Kids In The Hall.” And that’s saying a lot, because Canadians are goddamn hilarious.

Get a good taste of BVSS in the following sketch, which envisions a future Global Summit run entirely by women. It’s a future we’re personally ready for.

Baroness Von Sketch Show premieres later this summer on IFC.

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