DID YOU READ

The Lonely Island’s 10 Most Underrated Songs

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They may not have planned for it to happen, but The Lonely Island is one of the best rap groups ever. The comedy music trio has launched into the stratosphere thanks to their hilarious SNL videos and their Grammy and Oscar-nominated hit “Everything is Awesome” from The Lego Movie. Now with a new movie coming out, they’re bound to be bigger than ever. While we all have at least one favorite Lonely Island song, (who hasn’t heard “Dick in Box,” “Lazy Sunday” or “I’m on a Boat”?), we picked out some of their best, most underrated gems. And be sure to tune into College Humor’s Comedy Music Hall of Fame June 19th at 10P for more of your comedy music favorites.

10. “Sax Man”

This song is the most important thing to happen to a sax men since The Lost Boys. No lyric tops the actual sax parts.


9. “Hugs”

This’ll teach you not to read too much into that hug you got.

Best Lyric: Hugged so many ladies, arms shaky and shit
Because I’m the Wilt Chamberlain of the upper-body grip
.


8. “Great Day”

In a rare break from rap, the group sings a show tune about a guy who’s clearly self-medicating.

Best lyric: Much of the ocean is still unexplored/how did I get up in this tree?


7. “Diaper Money”

Just a bunch of dudes with dad bod rapping about responsibility.

Best Lyric: I did it my way, a very small percent of the time way


6. “Ras Trent”

This song perfectly encapsulates that one person you know who appropriates Rastafarian culture.

Best lyric: Red Stripe, Shabba, ragamuffin and culture


5. “No Homo”

Let’s be honest, this is what a bro is really trying to say to his bros when he yells “no homo.”

Best Lyric: Hey yo no homo but today I’m coming out the closet
Wanna scream it from the mountains like a gay prophet


4. “I Run NY”

No song has ever been truer about New York City.

Best lyric: Yo, I double literally run New York:
I run the marathon
Plus I organized it
So I double run the marathon


3. “Semicolon”

This important song explains how to properly use a semicolon.

Best lyric: You’re acting all Ma-chee-o; Ralph
But I’ll eat all you cats; Alf


2. “Spell it Out”

Rappers love to spell things. In this case, they spell the whole damn song.

Best Lyric: D-U-D-E-T-H-A-T-H-A-S-S-E-X-W-I-T-H-P-I-G-S-F
O-R-M-O-N-E-Y­-B-U-T-O-N-L-Y-A-S-A-S-I-D-E-T
H-I-N-G-R-I-G-H-T-N-O-W


1. “Jack Sparrow”

For us, it doesn’t get any better than Michael Bolton singing an ode to “The Jester of Tortuga,” Forrest Gump, Erin Brockovich and Scarface.

Best lyric: Capt Jack! Johnny Depp! Davy Jones! Giant squid! 


Check out the trailer for College Humor’s Comedy Music Hall of Fame below.

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SAG Life

Rappers Act Up

Watch the Yo! IFC Acts Movie Marathon Memorial Day Weekend.

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Photo Credit: Courtesy of the Everett Collection and the '90s)

Memorial Day weekend: how to celebrate? Nothing quite says “screw spring—let’s do summer” like blockbuster movies starring rappers who ditched lucrative music careers in order to become actors. It happened a lot, remember? Especially in and around the ’90s. Will Smith, Eminem, Ice Cube, Ice-T, Marky Mark Wahlberg, Ludacris…icons with the hubris to try the silver screen instead and have it totally work out.

But what if more rappers had made the leap? That’s a rhetorical question—movies (and life) would’ve been better, obviously. To prove it, here are some movies that totally would’ve been more memorable with rappers.

The Godfather

Starring Biggie, not Brando.
Godfather-BIG

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Only Coolio could improve upon Gene Wilder’s performance.
Coolio-Wonka

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Billy Elliot, with a dose of Missy Elliott.
Missy-Billy-Elliott

Robin Hood: Price of Thieves

Low hanging fruit, Hollywood.
Robin-Hood-and-Lil-Jon

And of course…

Kanye-of-The-Lambs

See NONE of those movies and a whole bunch of real ones this Memorial Day weekend on IFC’s rapper-filled movie marathon.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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