DID YOU READ

A Ranking of Michael Bay’s Most Epic Explosions

Pearl Harbor Explosion

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Michael Bay just loves to blow stuff up. It’s in his nature. Now we’ve seen so many explosions over the course of the filmmaker’s career that his movies wouldn’t be the same without at least one massive display of pyrotechnics. From Armageddon to Pearl Harbor to the Transformers franchise and beyond, Bay has given audiences some of the most spectacularly ridiculous explosions. At this point, they border on the downright absurd.

And like a bottle of wine, a Michael Bay explosion only gets better with age. Looking back on his career and all that his work has wrought, here are the best explosions from this unique mind ranked from worst to best.

8. Bad Boys, Plane Explosion

It’s safe to say no one forgot their boarding pass after this scene. Bay couldn’t help himself. He just had to include this massive explosion, but it was worth the effort. Now, how do I make the baddies’ scream my new ringtone?


7. Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Invasion of Chicago

The Decepticons united their forces and waged a full-scale invasion of Chicago, tearing down buildings with the worm-like Driller and mowing down countless more with their floating ships. No wonder everyone in the next installment, Age of Extinction, were so traumatized by the Transformer threat.


6. Transformers, Attack on the military base

Think back to the first Transformers movie and remember our first taste of Michael Bay at the helm of this franchise. It came when Blackout attacked a military base and left none alive but a handful of soldiers, including Josh Duhamel’s Captain Lennox and Tyrese Gibson’s Sergeant Epps. It set the tone for the franchise and assured us that words like “budget” and “subtlety” was not in Bay’s vocabulary.


5. Bad Boys II, Mansion explosion

Bay set aside a $40 million mansion just so he could blow it up in Bad Boys II. As the New York Post cited, he and producer Jerry Bruckheimer destroyed it within a matter of minutes, and in the most glorious fashion. Limbs flying, people screaming, bazookas blasting…and this is on top of Martin Lawrence and Will Smith shooting rounds upon rounds through its walls.


4. Transformers: Age of Extinction, The final showdown

If you thought Dark of the Moon was an explosion of visual effects, Age of Extinction upped the ante even more than we thought it could. It seems like Bay threw everything he possibly could into one movie: gargantuan robots, robot dinosaurs, alien weapons, Mark Wahlberg, car racing and a massive alien invasion complete with inception horn sound effects. Too bad he forgot to include a discernible plot.


3. The Rock, Nic Cage’s explosion dive

Bay’s obsession with military tech and sweet jets began with this Nic Cage/Sean Connery action flick. Even though Cage’s FBI agent gives the all-clear, Bay can’t help still squeezing in a big explosion — complete with Cage doing a signature Bay “jump away from a massive explosion” — for the end sequence.


2. Pearl Harbor, Attack on Pearl Harbor

Bay’s new stuff is pretty astounding, but they lack the style of his earlier work. Before most of the technological advancements, the director let his imagination explode all over the screen with the attack on Pearl Harbor that saw massive war ships torn to bits in a matter of seconds and planes falling from the sky to be blown to bits in a fiery blaze.


1. Armageddon, Meteor shower

What’s more visually explosive than the demolition of major cities via meteors? Paris was wiped out in a single death blow, Grand Central Station in New York was eviscerated by one strategically placed shot, and everyone was forced to watch as The Big Apple was cut down into The Little Apple. No, The Apple Sliver.

See all airings of Bad Boys on IFC.

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Inauguration Alternative

Bill Murray On Repeat

It's a movie "Murray-thon" all-day Friday on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs courtesy of GIPHY

Democrats, Republicans and Millennials agree: 2017 is shaping up to be a spectacle — a spectacle that really kicks into high gear this Friday with the presidential inauguration. Not only will the new POTUS swear in, but all the Country’s highest offices will be filled. It’s a daunting prospect, and to feel a little anxious about it is only normal. But if your anxiety is snowballing into panic, we have a solution:
Bill Murray.

He’s the human embodiment of a mental “Happy Place”, and there’s really no problem he can’t solve. So, with that in mind, how about we all set aside reality for a moment and let Bill take the pain away by imagining a top-shelf White House cabinet filled exclusively by his signature characters. Here are a few hypothetical appointments for your consideration…

Secretary of Defense:
Bill Murray from Stripes

His incompetence is balanced by charm, and dumb luck is inexplicably on his side. America could do worse.

Secretary of State:
Bill Murray from Lost In Translation

A seasoned globetrotter steeped in regional traditions who has the respect of the whole wide world. And he kills Costello in karaoke, which is very important.

Press Secretary:
Bill Murray from Ghostbusters

“Cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria.” Dude knows how to brief a room.

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Bill Murray from What About Bob.

A doctor-approved people person who knows that progress is measured in baby steps.

Secretary of Energy:
Bill Murray from Groundhog Day

Let’s be honest, this world is going to need a lot of do-overs.

Feeling better? Hold on to that bliss. And enjoy a healthy alternative to the inauguration brouhaha with multiple Murrays all Friday long in an IFC movie marathon including Kingpin, Zombieland, Ghostbusters, and Ghostbusters II.

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Home Run

Hank Azaria Gets Thrown A Curve Ball

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Unless you’ve somehow missed every episode of the Simpsons since 1989, then surely you know that Hank Azaria is one of the most important character actors of our time. He’s so prolific and his voice is so dynamic that he’s responsible for more iconic personalities than most folks realize. Basically, he’s the great and powerful Oz — except that when you pull back the curtain the truth is actually more impressive. And now Hank is coming to IFC to bring yet another character to the TV pop culture hive mind in the new series Brockmire. Check out the trailer below.

Based on the following Funny or Die short and co-starring Amanda Peet, Brockmire follows the story of imploded major league sportscaster Jim Brockmire as he tries to resurrect his career by calling plays for a floundering minor league team in a podunk town.

The series is written by Joel Church-Cooper (Undateable) and produced by Funny or Die’s Mike Farah and Joe Farrell, meaning that there’s funny in front of the camera, funny behind the camera–funny all around. Sounds like a ball to us.

Brockmire premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia On People Who Can’t Park

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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If flagrant bad parking takes nerve, then retaliatory note writing takes neuroses. Watch Fred and Carrie take passive aggression to next level in Car Notes, the new Portlandia web series presented by Subaru. The first episode is yours right here and now, and you can see every installment of Car Notes anytime online, on the IFC app and on demand.

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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