DID YOU READ

The 7 Funniest Stoner Scenes in Movie History

SUPER TROOPERS, Geoffrey Arend, Andre Vippolis, Jay Chandrasekhar, Joey Kern, 2001, TM & Copyright (

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By Jeff Finkle

For those of you reading this in Colorado or Oregon you might want to grab your perfectly rolled, legal joint and a keep a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos handy, but you don’t have to be high to laugh at these classic stoner scenes. If you are wondering why Cheech and Chong are not represented in this list it is only because they are the Adam & Eve of stoner comedy and have produced so many hilarious scenes over the years; they are a genre onto themselves. This list is inspired by the funniest scenes involving stoners and not necessarily the funniest stoner characters, which sounds like something a stoner in a movie would say before losing his train of thought.

7. True Romance, Floyd

In a movie where Christian Slater’s Clarence gets advice on a coke deal from Elvis’ ghost and Bronson Pinchot sneezes out a bag of cocaine after being pulled over by highway patrol, it is Pitt’s Floyd who steals the movie with the little dialogue he is given. (“Don’t condescend me… I’ll kill you, man.”) As James Gandolfini’s hit man and then the Italian mob knock on his door looking to kill anyone who knows the whereabouts of his roommate Dick Ritchie, Clarence and his wife, and former prostitute for a day, Alabama, Brad Pitt’s Floyd remains perfectly chill on his couch enjoying the movie Freejack and his honey bear bong. How could anyone condescend to this lovable stoner?


6. Friday, Smokey

This scene from Friday is number two on this list for a reason but Chris Tucker’s performance as Smokey, the ultimate South Central stoner, is as memorable a part of ‘90s pop culture as flannel shirts, bands that sounded like Pearl Jam and well, movies about life in the hood. Except the brilliance of Friday is that it’s not about surviving a gang, it’s about getting through a typical Friday and avoiding the neighborhood bully. John Witherspoon, as Mr. Jones, the father of Ice Cube’s Craig, does something in this scene that is harder than not laughing while watching the movie Friday — he steals it from Chris Tucker.


5. Fast Times at Ridgemont High, “He’s gonna kill us!”

Sean Penn may have spent the past 30 years searching for serious, gut wrenchingly emotional roles but any fan of ‘80s teen comedies, especially anyone who grew up in the ‘80s will always remember him as Spicoli from Fast Times. From “You dick?” to “No Shirts, No Shoes, No Dice..” to “Alright Hamilton!,” just about everything that Sean Penn says as Jeff Spicoli is a quote fans of this teen comedy classic will remember. Check out this hilarious scene as Spicoli enjoys a leisurely drive with Jefferson’s little brother and utters numerous legendary comedy lines including, “My old man is a Television repairman, he’s got the ultimate set of tools. I can fix it.”


4. Half Baked, Thurgood Wears a Wire

This homage to great stoner scenes wouldn’t be complete without a Half-Baked scene. If there was a Mt. Rushmore of stoner movies, Half-Baked would be Abraham Lincoln, except with pieces of Funyons stuck in its beard. You know you have an all-star cast for a stoner movie when Dave Chapelle is the straight man out of the group, and you might find yourself shouting out Abracadabra at random times of the day after watching these stoner buddies at their highest. Just make sure you’ve stocked up on the essential graham crackers, grape jelly, Capt. Crunch and condoms before watching the fully-baked boys try and pull a sting operation on drug kingpin Samson.

3. Ted, Name Guessing Scene

One can only hope that Seth Macfarlane’s pitch to greenlight Ted went something like this: A stoner teddy bear with a wicked New England accent is best friends with Mark Wahlberg and they get into enough raunchy situations to make American Pie look like The Sound of Music. It is debatable if there is anything in Ted as funny as Giovanni Ribisi doing his Donnie Dance or a coke-fueled cameo by Sam Jones, aka Flash (Ahaaaaah, he saved every one of us) Gordon. But, this classic scene establishes Ted and Jon’s friendship and it is definitely the funniest Mark Wahlberg has been acting as if he was high since he stared off into the abyss during the drug deal gone bad in Boogie Nights.


2. Super Troopers, Opening Scene

Meow, if the opening of a movie is crucial for setting the tone of the film and establishing its protagonists, then the opening to Super Troopers should be taught in a Comedy 101 college film course. Meow, if there’s one thing Howard Hawks, Blake Edwards and Woody Allen have in common, it’s that none of them were ever part of the comedy troupe Broken Lizard, who wrote and starred in Super Troopers. The troopers get themselves into a series of cheeky shenanigans. (Did somebody say shenanigans?) as they attempt to foil a meowijuana drug ring and the local cops in the fictional town of Spurberry, Vermont.

Grab your liter of cola meow and enjoy every moment of the opening to Super Troopers as they mess with a couple of college kids getting stoned on a leisurely drive to Canada.


1. The Big Lebowski, “She kidnapped herself”

In the parlance of our times, labeling The Dude as simply a stoner is like saying Gandhi was just an Indian guy who looked amazing in a robe. Sure, he’s a stoner, but he’s also a pacifist, an avid White Russian Enthusiast, a huge Creedence fan, a lover of all things bowling, the author of The Port Huron Statement (the original Port Huron Statement) and of course someone who has perfected the art of dabbling in “a little of this and a little of that.” This quintessential “Dude” scene builds to a crescendo of hilarity as Jeff Bridges, aka, The Dude, feverishly tries to explain to Jeffrey Lebowski and his trusted confidant Brandt (played with subtle awesomeness by the late Philip Seymour Hoffman) that “new sh*t has come to light” in Bunny’s kidnapping.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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Breaking News

From Canada With Love

Baroness von Sketch Show premieres this summer on IFC.

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Breaking news that (finally) isn’t apocalyptic!

IFC announced today that it acquired acclaimed Canadian comedy series Baroness von Sketch Show, slated to make its US of A premiere this summer. And yes, it’s important to note that it’s a Canadian sketch comedy series, because Canada is currently a shining beacon of civilization in the western hemisphere, and Baroness von Sketch Show reflects that light in every way possible.

The series is fronted entirely by women, which isn’t unusual in the sketch comedy world but is quite rare in the televised sketch comedy world. Punchy, smart, and provocative, each episode of Baroness von Sketch Show touches upon outrageous-yet-relatable real world subjects in ways both unexpected and deeply satisfying: soccer moms, awkward office birthday parties, being over 40 in a gym locker room…dry shampoo…

Indiewire called it “The Best Comedy You’ve Never Seen” and The National Post said that it’s “the funniest thing on Canadian television since Kids In The Hall.” And that’s saying a lot, because Canadians are goddamn hilarious.

Get a good taste of BVSS in the following sketch, which envisions a future Global Summit run entirely by women. It’s a future we’re personally ready for.

Baroness Von Sketch Show premieres later this summer on IFC.

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