DID YOU READ

5 Predator Vs. Match-Ups We’re Dying to See

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Nearly 30 years ago, we were introduced to one of the strongest, most formidable villains to ever fall from the sky. Equipped with a cloaking device, a seemingly unlimited arsenal, and combat training that was beyond superhuman, the alien from 1987’s Predator was destined for battle royales that crossed multiple franchises. And sure enough, after years of splashy comic depictions and 16-bit hypotheses, Predator took on the xenomorphs from the Alien franchise in the 2004 geek-baiting actioner, Alien vs. Predator. But all the movie did was stoke up the flames of possibility and generate more fan-fictional melees with other iconic rivals.

So in the interest of mashing cinematic universes like a crazed studio executive, here are five Predator match-ups we’d love to see on the big screen.

5. Pinhead Vs. Predator

Pinhead Vs. Predator

Mike Schuster/New World Pictures/ 20th Century Fox

Who better to match wits with a being from another planet than a being from another dimension? Pinhead, the breakout baddie from Hellraiser, is one of only a few characters that has both the brains and supernatural brawn to fight the one-alien army. Able to teleport, resist projectiles, and summon hooks and chains for gruesome mutilation, The Bringer of Pain can’t be taken out by your average, everyday shoulder-mounted plasma caster.


4. Batman Vs. Predator

Batman Vs. Predator

Mike Schuster/Warner Bros. Pictures/20th Century Fox

We’ve already witnessed how well the Dark Knight could handle himself against the Predator in the all-too-brief short film Batman: Dead End. But to see that standoff expanded and played out over the course of 120 minutes would be a brutal delight. And heck, if producers wanted to continue the themes and also throw in the Joker and a few dozen xenomorphs, who are we to say no?


3. Ash Vs. Predator

Ash Vs. Predator

Mike Schuster/Universal Pictures/20th Century Fox

If there’s anyone who knows a thing or two about battling other-worldly creatures, it’s Ash from the Evil Dead series. Quick with the quip yet slow on the uptake, Bruce Campbell’s beloved character would present a conflict that was as visually dynamic as it was amusing. After all, what good is a fan-driven movie match-up if it isn’t brimming with fun?


2. Indiana Jones Vs. Predator

Indiana Jones Vs. Predator

Mike Schuster/Paramount Pictures/20th Century Fox

Intergalactic mercenary might versus 1940s all-American gumption? Yeah, we’re in. Injecting Predator into Indiana Jones’ pulpy serial world may seem like too disparate of a combo — and yes, we all remember what happened when aliens were introduced to the franchise — but that would be underestimating the ingenuity of a globetrotting archaeologist who once killed a battalion of Nazis with ghosts.


1. RoboCop Vs. Predator

RoboCop Vs. Predator

Mike Schuster/Orion Pictures/20th Century Fox

One 1987 cinematic icon versus another, this is one graphic brawl that would probably retain RoboCop’s original X-rating. And yet, it’s a premise that could break box office records: the hero cyborg cop tasked to take out a marauding alien serial killer set against the mean streets of a futuristic, crime-ridden Detroit. Add some late-’80s Verhoeven satire and a ruthless Kurtwood Smith, and we’re ready to reserve our tickets now.

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Inauguration Alternative

Bill Murray On Repeat

It's a movie "Murray-thon" all-day Friday on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs courtesy of GIPHY

Democrats, Republicans and Millennials agree: 2017 is shaping up to be a spectacle — a spectacle that really kicks into high gear this Friday with the presidential inauguration. Not only will the new POTUS swear in, but all the Country’s highest offices will be filled. It’s a daunting prospect, and to feel a little anxious about it is only normal. But if your anxiety is snowballing into panic, we have a solution:
Bill Murray.

He’s the human embodiment of a mental “Happy Place”, and there’s really no problem he can’t solve. So, with that in mind, how about we all set aside reality for a moment and let Bill take the pain away by imagining a top-shelf White House cabinet filled exclusively by his signature characters. Here are a few hypothetical appointments for your consideration…

Secretary of Defense:
Bill Murray from Stripes

His incompetence is balanced by charm, and dumb luck is inexplicably on his side. America could do worse.

Secretary of State:
Bill Murray from Lost In Translation

A seasoned globetrotter steeped in regional traditions who has the respect of the whole wide world. And he kills Costello in karaoke, which is very important.

Press Secretary:
Bill Murray from Ghostbusters

“Cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria.” Dude knows how to brief a room.

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Bill Murray from What About Bob.

A doctor-approved people person who knows that progress is measured in baby steps.

Secretary of Energy:
Bill Murray from Groundhog Day

Let’s be honest, this world is going to need a lot of do-overs.

Feeling better? Hold on to that bliss. And enjoy a healthy alternative to the inauguration brouhaha with multiple Murrays all Friday long in an IFC movie marathon including Kingpin, Zombieland, Ghostbusters, and Ghostbusters II.

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Home Run

Hank Azaria Gets Thrown A Curve Ball

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Unless you’ve somehow missed every episode of the Simpsons since 1989, then surely you know that Hank Azaria is one of the most important character actors of our time. He’s so prolific and his voice is so dynamic that he’s responsible for more iconic personalities than most folks realize. Basically, he’s the great and powerful Oz — except that when you pull back the curtain the truth is actually more impressive. And now Hank is coming to IFC to bring yet another character to the TV pop culture hive mind in the new series Brockmire. Check out the trailer below.

Based on the following Funny or Die short and co-starring Amanda Peet, Brockmire follows the story of imploded major league sportscaster Jim Brockmire as he tries to resurrect his career by calling plays for a floundering minor league team in a podunk town.

The series is written by Joel Church-Cooper (Undateable) and produced by Funny or Die’s Mike Farah and Joe Farrell, meaning that there’s funny in front of the camera, funny behind the camera–funny all around. Sounds like a ball to us.

Brockmire premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia On People Who Can’t Park

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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If flagrant bad parking takes nerve, then retaliatory note writing takes neuroses. Watch Fred and Carrie take passive aggression to next level in Car Notes, the new Portlandia web series presented by Subaru. The first episode is yours right here and now, and you can see every installment of Car Notes anytime online, on the IFC app and on demand.

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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