DID YOU READ

10 Advantages to Having Your Own Clone

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AMC Networks is cloning the season 3 premiere of Orphan Black and airing it across all of it U.S. Networks – IFC, AMC, WE tv, SundanceTV and BBC America on Sat, April 18 9p.

BBC America’s hit sci-fi drama series Orphan Black is coming back for its third season, which means the Clone Club will be back in session. Mark it in your calendars: April 18th at 9 p.m. EST is when we’ll get another dose of Sarah, Alison, Cosima, Helena and the rest of the gang.

In the premiere, the Project Leda sisters are going to have to come to each others’ aide: Sarah is pursuing Helena, who’s trapped in a compound, and Alison and Donnie are having some money troubles. We have faith everything will work out — and if it doesn’t, it’ll surely be entertaining to watch. But most of all we’re super jealous of the sheer awesomeness that comes with having more than one of yourself.

Everyone at one point or another has imagined what it would be like if there were two, or three, or five of you walking around the planet. And watching Orphan Black just makes us want to start funding cloning research so we can have our very own crazy Helena or chill pal Cosima. Here are 10 advantages to having a clone (or two) around to watch your back.

10. There Ain’t No Party Like A Clone Club Party

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We know you have a lot of goals and aspirations, but let’s face it, there are not enough hours in the day to do whatcha wanna do. This will all change when all of a sudden there’s more of you. It warrants an impromptu dance party, too.


9. You Can Get Into So Much Trouble

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Double, double, toil and trouble, amirite? The Weasley twins from Harry Potter aren’t clones, but their shenanigans rival that of the Clone Club. I mean, they’re no Helena, but a little mischief never hurt anyone. The more clones you have, the more fun (or trouble) you can get into.


8. You’re Doubling Your Wardrobe

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It’s a cliche reason at this point, but true nonetheless: Clothes are expensive as hell these days. Old Navy is the new Gap, Gap is the new Banana Republic, Banana is the new J.Crew, and the Crew is too expensive for even suburban housewives like Alison on white wine-tinged shopping sprees. If you have a clone, that means sharing is caring.


7. It’s Great For Experimenting

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There’s no better test subject than a clone. Wanna see if you can handle psychedelics? Or even a particularly spicy sriracha sauce? Get a temperature check first by having your replica give it a go. Thinking about dying your hair? Have your clone look like a tragic mess for a little while. Basically your clone is your own personal human guinea pig.


6. You Can Face Your Faults and Change…Your Clone

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Nothing would make you take a long, cold hard look at yourself more than having, uh, yourself staring right back at you. But who wants to actually change? Make your clone make the hard life changes you’d rather ignore. That way you have more time for the truly important things — like marathoning past seasons of Orphan Black.


5. Staging Group Singalongs Has Never Been Easier

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We’ve all been there. It’s karaoke night, the music’s pumping, and you want to break into a killer group singalong to show everyone around who’s boss. Your friends can’t do, ’cause they’re horribly off-key. That’s why you need more of you in the mix to properly convey the power of “Motown Philly” or Spice Girls’ “Wannabe.”


4. Clones Always Have Each Others’ Backs

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If you’re in trouble, there’s no one you’d rather have in your corner than…well, another you. As Bjork once sang, how about a whole army of you? That’s one thing that made everyone envy Agent Smith from The Matrix. He’s a royal douche, but his ability to copy himself was a pretty sweet trick.


3. There’s Always Someone to Laugh at Your Jokes

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Have you ever tried to tell a joke to your friends, but then no one acknowledges it? Everyone stays silent and then maybe you tell it again just in case they didn’t hear it the first time. If you had a clone, that would never happen. Twice the power, twice the sass, twice the laughs.


2. You Can Get Away With Murder…Literally

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Haven’t you ever watched Law & Order or any soap opera ever made? If you have a sadistic twin who gets his or her kicks from pulling the wings off of flies, it doesn’t help your case. But if you’re the one pulling some off-the-books illegal activity, it’s good to have a scapegoat who looks exactly like you.


1. Every Halloween = Instant Group Costume

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Every Halloween costume competition should just fork over the top prize to you in advance of what will come every October 31st with your clones backing you up. How about taking a nod from The Big Bang Theory and get your clones to join you as The Flash in motion?

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Grow TFU

Adulting Like You Mean It

Commuters makes its debut on IFC's Comedy Crib.

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Jared Warner, Nick Ciavarella, and Tim Dean were once a part of Murderfist, a group of comedy writers, actors, producers, parents, and reluctant adults. Together with InstaMiniSeries’s Nikki Borges, they’re making their IFC Comedy Crib debut with the refreshingly-honest and joyfully-hilarious Commuters. The webseries follows thirtysomethings Harris and Olivia as they brave the waters of true adulthood, and it’s right on point.

Jared, Nick, Nikki and Tim were kind enough to answer a few questions about Commuters for us. Here’s a snippet of that conversation…

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IFC: How would you describe Commuters to a fancy network executive you met in an elevator?

Nick: Two 30-somethings leave the Brooklyn life behind, and move to the New Jersey suburbs in a forced attempt to “grow up.” But they soon find out they’ve got a long way to go to get to where they want to be.

IFC: How would you describe Commuters to a drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?

Jared: It’s a show about how f*cking stupid people who think they are smart can be.

IFC: What’s your origin story? When did you all meet and how long have you been working together?

Jared: Nick, Tim, and I were all in the sketch group Murderfist since, what, like 2004? God. Anyway, Tim and Nick left the group to pursue other frivolous things, like children and careers, but we all enjoyed writing together and kept at it. We were always more interested in storytelling than sketch comedy lends itself to, which led to our webseries Jared Posts A Personal. That was a show about being in your 20s and embracing the chaos of being young in the city. Commuters is the counterpoint, i guess. Our director Adam worked at Borders (~THE PAST!!~) with Tim, came out to a Murderfist show once, and we’ve kept him imprisoned ever since.

IFC: What was the genesis of Commuters?

Tim: Jared had an idea for a series about the more realistic, less romantic aspects of being in a serious relationship.  I moved out of the city to the suburbs and Nick got engaged out in LA.   We sort of combined all of those facets and Commuters was the end result.

IFC: How would Harris describe Olivia?

Jared: Olivia is the smartest, coolest, hottest person in the world, and Harris can’t believe he gets to be with her, even though she does overreact to everything and has no chill. Like seriously, ease up. It doesn’t always have to be ‘a thing.’

IFC: How would Olivia describe Harris?

Nikki:  Harris is smart, confident with a dry sense of humor but he’s also kind of a major chicken shit…. Kind of like if Han Solo and Barney Rubble had a baby.

IFC: Why do you think the world is ready for this series?

Nikki:  I think this is the most accurate portrayal of what a modern relationship looks like. Expectations for what your life is ‘supposed to look like’ are confusing and often a let down but when you’re married to your best friend, it’s going to be ok because you will always find a way to make each other laugh.

IFC: Is the exciting life of NYC twentysomethings a sweet dream from which we all must awake, or is it a nightmare that we don’t realize is happening until it’s over?

Tim: Now that i’ve spent time living in the suburbs, helping to raise a two year old, y’all city folk have no fucking clue how great you’ve got it.

Nikki: I think of it similar to how I think about college. There’s a time and age for it to be glorious but no one wants to hang out with that 7th year senior. Luckily, NYC is so multifaceted that you can still have an exciting life here but it doesn’t have to be just what the twentysomethings are doing (thank god).

Jared: New York City is a garbage fire.

See the whole season of Commuters right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib.

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C'mon Fellas

A Man Mansplains To Men

Why Baroness von Sketch Show is a must-see.

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Mansplaining is when a man takes it upon himself to explain something to a woman that she already knows. It happens a lot, but it’s not going to happen here. Ladies, go ahead and skip to the end of this post to watch a free episode of IFC’s latest addition, Baroness von Sketch Show.

However, if you’re a man, you might actually benefit from a good mansplanation. So take a knee, lean in, and absorb the following wisdom.

No Dicks

Baroness von Sketch Show is made entirely by women, therefore this show isn’t focused on men. Can you believe it? I know what you’re thinking: how will we know when to laugh if the jokes aren’t viewed through the dusty lens of the patriarchy? Where are the thinly veiled penis jokes? Am I a bad person? In order: you will, nowhere, and yes.

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Huge Balls

Did you know that there’s more to life than poop jokes, sex jokes, body part jokes? I mean, those things are all really good things, natch, and totally edgy. But Baroness von Sketch Show does something even edgier. It holds up a brutal funhouse mirror to our everyday life. This is a bulls**t world we made, fellas.

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Oh Canada

After you watch the Canadian powerhouses of Baroness von Sketch Show and think to yourself “Dear god, this is so real” and “I’ve gotta talk about this,” do yourself a favor and think a-boot your options: Refrain from sharing your sage wisdom with any woman anywhere (believe us, she gets it). Instead, tell a fellow bro and get the mansplaining out of your system while also spreading the word about a great show.

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Dudes, that’s the deal.
Women, start reading again here:


Check out the preview episode of Baroness von Sketch Show and watch the series premiere August 2 on IFC.

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Happy Tears

Binge Don’t Cringe

Catch up on episodes of Documentary Now! and Portlandia.

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Photo Credit: GIFs via GIPHY

A brain can only take so much.

Every five minutes, all day, every day, ludicrously stressful headlines push our mental limits as we struggle to adapt to a reality that seems increasingly less real. What’s a mind to do when simple denial just isn’t good enough anymore?

Radical suggestion: repeal and replace. And by that we mean take all the bad news that keeps you up at night, press pause, and substitute it with some genuine (not nervous, for a change) laughter. Here are some of the issues on our mind.

Gender Inequality

Feminist bookstore owners by day, still feminist bookstore owners by night, Toni and Candace show the male gaze who’s boss. Learn about their origin story (SPOILER: there’s an epic dance battle) and see what happens when their own brand of empowerment gets out of hand.

Healthcare

From Candace’s heart attack to the rise of the rawvolution, this Portlandia episode proves that healthcare is vital.

Peaceful Protests

Too many online petitions, too little time? Get WOKE with Fred and Carrie when they learn how to protest.

What Could Have Been

Can’t say the name “Clinton” without bursting into tears? Documentary Now!’s masterfully political “The Bunker” sheds a cozy new light on the house that Bill and Hill built. Just pretend you don’t know how the story really ends.

Fake News

A healthy way to break the high-drama news cycle is to switch over to “Dronez”, which has all the thrills of ubiquitous adventure journalism without any of the customary depression.

The more you watch, the better you feel. So get started on past episodes of Documentary Now! and Portlandia right now at IFC.com and the IFC app.

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