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Bomb Squad: Why Did R.I.P.D. Tank?

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Welcome to “Bomb Squad,” a recurring column that takes a closer look at a movie that tanked at the box office and tries to figure out what happened.

From the outset, R.I.P.D. held some promise. Starring Jeff Bridges and Ryan Reynolds, and based on a Dark Horse comic book, the film was being positioned as a new version of Ghostbusters or Men in Black, telling the story of two deceased, wisecracking policemen who team up to battle runaway paranormal folks who are seeking refuge among the living. The box office results, however, were ghastly: R.I.P.D. brought in less than $13 million in its first weekend, ending up in seventh place. (Even more painful, the film is said to have had a budget of $130 million.) What exactly happened here? Let’s take a look at some possible theories, some more convincing than others, and then come up with our verdict…

Theory No. 1: Ryan Reynolds can’t open a movie.

In a sane universe, Ryan Reynolds would seem to be your prototypical movie star. He’s handsome, he’s funny, he’s buff—quite simply, he simply looks the part. But when you check out his commercial track record, that’s when the problems start. His biggest hit is The Croods, an animated movie where he isn’t even the lead. Other movies that have performed well — X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Safe House and The Proposal — featured him in limited or second-fiddle roles. The one movie where he’s really the main attraction, Green Lantern, made over $116 million but was labeled a disappointment, in part because the reviews were scathing and in part because it supposedly cost at least $200 million to make. In R.I.P.D., he’s again supporting a bigger name — in this case, Jeff Bridges — but because his costar is a legend with an Oscar who seems above the messy needs of A-list stars to deliver huge box office, this new movie’s failure will probably hurt Reynolds a lot more than it does Bridges. (Also tarnishing Reynolds’ box-office credentials: He was the lead voice in Turbo, which underperformed this weekend as well.)

Theory No. 2: It just seemed like a Ghostbusters/Men in Black rip-off.

It’s no secret that Hollywood likes to recycle successful formulas, whether that means rebooting a franchise or copying what worked in a movie from the past. R.I.P.D. clearly was targeting fans who dug Ghostbusters and Men in Black — the new film has the same smirky attitude as those venerable action-comedies — but director Robert Schwentke never could quite figure out what made the Bridges/Reynolds pairing fun. Instead, it’s a lot of strained oil-and-water sparring without the clever characters that made those other franchises so breezy and engaging. Nobody would have loved Men in Black that much if it was just a bunch of nifty effects — they came for Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones.

Theory No. 3: Nobody was familiar with the source material.

More and more often, studios are very happy to serve up movies during the summer that are based on properties you already know: Star Trek Into Darkness, Iron Man 3, Monsters University. By comparison, R.I.P.D. was almost an original idea. Sure, it was adapted from Peter M. Lenkov’s comic book, but this is the first time it’s been made into a film. The problem with that rationale, however, is that this summer has actually been pretty decent when it comes to first-time films. The Heat, The Croods and Now You See Me all made over $100 million, each produced from an original screenplay. There’s always a market for fresh ideas, but R.I.P.D. clearly didn’t qualify in the minds of a lot of audiences.

Theory No. 4: Jeff Bridges keeps doing the same shtick.

Everybody loves Bridges, and with good reason. Ever since appearing in The Last Picture Show as a fresh-faced kid, he has proved to be one of Hollywood’s most enduring actors, finally winning a long-overdue Academy Award for his work in 2009’s Crazy Heart. But in recent years, he’s enjoyed turning out spirited, slightly nutso portrayals in films like Masked and Anonymous, Tron: Legacy and True Grit. (The height of such performances, of course, is in The Big Lebowski.) His performance as the Old West lawman Roy in R.I.P.D. is a silly twist on his drunken, ornery Rooster from True Grit, but it felt formulaic, Bridges going to the watch-me-be-kooky well once too often. It’s really hard to believe that a lot of people would have stayed away from R.I.P.D. just for that reason, but it’s always possible it was a contributing factor for some.

The Verdict

There are plenty of explanations for what might have contributed to the commercial failure of R.I.P.D. (For example, Universal’s decision to only screen the movie the night before its release was a strong indication to the world that the studio knew it had a stinker on its hands.) But the overarching problem seems, in hindsight, rather simple: There was nothing that interesting or compelling in what audiences saw in ads that made them want to seek out this movie. Especially in the summer, a film has to offer something genuinely exciting (or, at the very least, pleasantly familiar) to get people to come out. R.I.P.D. never did that, so it’s little surprise that it flat-lined.

You can follow Tim Grierson on Twitter.

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Forget Oscar

Find Your Spirit Animal

The Spirit Awards are LIVE this Saturday at 2p PT/5p ET.

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In just a few precious days, the greatest, most epic, most star-studded awards ceremony of the year comes to IFC.

And please, we’re definitely not talking about the Oscars. We’re talking about the Spirit Awards. Hosted by iconic comedy duo Nick Kroll and John Mulaney, it’s a relatively under-the-radar awards show with serious cred. And if the past is any indicator, we’re in for a wild night.

If you feel like doing your homework, you can find a full list of nominees and performance excerpts here. It reads like a who’s who of everyone that matters – those larger-than-life personalities with status that borders on mythological. Our celebrity spirit animals, if you will.

This isn’t hyperbole. Literally everyone who takes the stage at the awards show is spirit animal material. Let’s see if we can help you find yours…

Do you

Live in someone else’s shadow despite shining like the sun? Do you inexplicably vandalize your pretty-boy good looks with a sloppy-joe man bun and a repellent pubic-hair beard? Do you think sounding stoned and sounding thoughtful are kinda the same thing?

Congratulations, your spirit animal is Casey Affleck.

He’s the self-canonized patron saint of anyone who’s got the goods but doesn’t give a damn.

Do you

Have mid-length hair and exude a certain feminine masculinity that is universally appealing? Are you drawn to situations that promise little to nothing in the way of grooming or hygiene as a transparently self-conscious attempt to conceal your radiant inner glow? Does that fail miserably?

Way to go, your spirit animal is Viggo Mortensen.

He’s the yoga teacher of actors, in that what should make him super nasty only increases his curb appeal.

Do you

Get zero recognition for work that everyone knows is unrivaled? Do you inspire greatness in others yet get shortchanged when it comes to your own acclaim? Are you a goddam B-52 bomber in an industry of biplanes?

Bingo, your spirit animal is Annette Bening.

What does it take for this artist to win an Oscar? Honestly now, if her performance in 20th Century Women doesn’t earn her every award on the planet, consider it proof that the Universe truly is a cold dark void absent of reason or compassion.

Do you

Walk into a room full of strangers and walk out with a room full of friends? Have you been hiding under the radar just waiting for the right moment to leap out into the spotlight and stay there FOREVER? Do you possess the almost messianic ability to elevate Shia LaBeouf’s on-screen charisma?

You guessed it (or not), your spirit animal is 100% Sasha Lane.

If you haven’t seen American Honey, then you haven’t heard of her. She came out of the blue with a performance both subtle and powerful, and now she’s going to be in all the movies from this moment on. Or she should be, at any rate.

Don’t see your spirit animal there? Worry not. There are many more nominees to choose from, and you can see them all (yes, including Shia LaBeouf) during the Independent Spirit Awards, this Saturday at 2pm PT/5pm ET only on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia Keeps Road Rage In Park

Get a lesson in parking etiquette on a new Portlandia.

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It’s the most American form of cause and effect: Park like a monster, receive a passive-aggressive note.

car notes note

This unofficial rule of the road is critical to keeping the great big wheel of car-related Karma in balance. And naturally, Portlandia’s Kath and Dave have elevated it to an awkward, awkward art form in Car Notes, the Portlandia web series presented by Subaru.

If you’ve somehow missed the memo about Car Notes until now, you can catch up on every installment online, on the IFC app, and on demand. You can even have a little taste right here:

If your interest is piqued – great news for you! A special Car Notes sketch makes an appearance in the latest episode of Portlandia, and you can catch up on it now right here.

Watch all-new Portlandia Thursdays at 10P on IFC.

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Naked and Hungry

Two New Ways to Threeway

IFC's Comedy Crib gets sensual in time for Valentine's Day.

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This week, two scandalous new digital series debut on IFC’s Comedy Crib.
Ménage à Trois invites people to participate in a real-life couple’s fantasy boudoir. And The Filling is Mutual follows two saucy chefs who invite comedians to make food inspired by their routines. Each show crosses some major boundaries in sexy and/or delicious ways, and each are impossible to describe in detail without arousing some awkward physical cravings. Which is why it’s best to hear it directly from the minds behind the madness…

Ménage à Trois

According to Diana Kolsky and Murf Meyer, the two extremely versatile constants in the ever-shifting à trois, “MàT is a sensually psychedelic late night variety show exploring matters of hearts, parts and every goddamn thing in between…PS, any nudes will be 100% tasteful.”

This sexy brainchild includes sketches, music, and props that would put Pee-wee’s Playhouse to shame. But how could this fantastical new twist on the vanilla-sex variety show format have come to be?

“We met in a UCB improv class taught by Chris Gethard. It was clear that we both humped to the beat of our own drum; our souls and tongues intermingled at the bar after class, so we dove in head first.”

Sign me up, but promise to go slow. This tricycle is going to need training wheels.

The Filling is Mutual

Comedians Jen Saunderson and Jenny Zigrino became best friends after meeting in the restroom at the Gotham Comedy Club, which explains their super-comfortable dynamic when cooking with their favorite comedians. “We talk about comedy, sex, menses, the obnoxiousness of Christina Aguilera all while eating food that most would push off their New Year’s resolution.”

The hook of cooking food based off of comedy routines is so perfect and so personal. It made us wonder about what dishes Jen & Jenny would pair with some big name comedy staples, like…

Bill Murray?
“Oh, that’s easy Meatballs with Lingonberry Space Jam it’d be great, but then we’d have to Oh, that’s easy Meatballs with Lingonberry Space Jam it’d be great, but then we’d have to… Oh, that’s easy Meatballs with Lingonberry Space Jam it’d be great, but then we’d have to avoid doing any kind of silly Groundhog Day reference.” 

Bridget Everett?
“Cream Balls… Sea Salt encrusted Chocolate Ganache Covered Ice Cream Ball that melt cream when you bite into them.” 

Nick Kroll & John Mulaney? 
“I’d make George and Gil black and white cookies from scratch and just as we open the oven to put the cookie in we’d prank ’em with an obnoxious amount of tuna!!!”

Carrie Brownstein & Fred Armisen? 
“Definitely a raw cacao “safe word” brownie. Cacao!”

Just perfect.

See both new series in their entirety on IFC’s Comedy Crib.

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