DID YOU READ

Will Darth Vader be resurrected for “Star Wars: Episode VII”?

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Of all the characters who have been introduced in the “Star Wars” universe, Darth Vader has got to be the most iconic. But considering his death at the end of “Return of the Jedi,” it doesn’t seem likely that his black helmet will be returning in the upcoming “Star Wars: Episode VII.”

Well, not so fast. A new rumor is claiming that the man once known as Anakin Skywalker could be resurrected for the new movie. According to a “film mole” who talked to British tabloid Express, Darth Vader could be brought back in some capacity in the forthcoming “Episode VII.”

“He’s an integral part of the franchise. Replacing him is virtually impossible. The plan is for him to return and play a significant role in the new films,” the source said. “This is science fiction remember. Darth Vader will rise from the ashes.”

Considering the plan is to bring back older versions of Luke, Han and Leia in the new movie (yes, that means it will likely star Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford), we aren’t putting anything past Disney. But Darth Vader returning? Really? Unless a new version of the character has risen to glory in the time between the end of “Return of the Jedi” and beginning of whatever “Episode VII” ends up being called, we doubt that will happen.

But that doesn’t mean we don’t think there will be a return of the man beneath the mask. Anakin followed the likes of Yoda, Obi Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn as he lived on in spirit form, so why not bring that concept back (yes, we begrudgingly realize that means bringing back Hayden Christensen as well) and just have him hanging around and offering his words of wisdom to young padawans?

Of course, we all know the real reason Disney would want to bring back Vader: Money. But if Darth Maul could sell action figures, couldn’t a new villain? We’d say let the past stay dead and don’t ruin our childhoods (again).

Would you want Darth Vader to come back in “Star Wars: Episode VII”? Tell us in the comments section below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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Inauguration Alternative

Bill Murray On Repeat

It's a movie "Murray-thon" all-day Friday on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs courtesy of GIPHY

Democrats, Republicans and Millennials agree: 2017 is shaping up to be a spectacle — a spectacle that really kicks into high gear this Friday with the presidential inauguration. Not only will the new POTUS swear in, but all the Country’s highest offices will be filled. It’s a daunting prospect, and to feel a little anxious about it is only normal. But if your anxiety is snowballing into panic, we have a solution:
Bill Murray.

He’s the human embodiment of a mental “Happy Place”, and there’s really no problem he can’t solve. So, with that in mind, how about we all set aside reality for a moment and let Bill take the pain away by imagining a top-shelf White House cabinet filled exclusively by his signature characters. Here are a few hypothetical appointments for your consideration…

Secretary of Defense:
Bill Murray from Stripes

His incompetence is balanced by charm, and dumb luck is inexplicably on his side. America could do worse.

Secretary of State:
Bill Murray from Lost In Translation

A seasoned globetrotter steeped in regional traditions who has the respect of the whole wide world. And he kills Costello in karaoke, which is very important.

Press Secretary:
Bill Murray from Ghostbusters

“Cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria.” Dude knows how to brief a room.

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Bill Murray from What About Bob.

A doctor-approved people person who knows that progress is measured in baby steps.

Secretary of Energy:
Bill Murray from Groundhog Day

Let’s be honest, this world is going to need a lot of do-overs.

Feeling better? Hold on to that bliss. And enjoy a healthy alternative to the inauguration brouhaha with multiple Murrays all Friday long in an IFC movie marathon including Kingpin, Zombieland, Ghostbusters, and Ghostbusters II.

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Home Run

Hank Azaria Gets Thrown A Curve Ball

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Unless you’ve somehow missed every episode of the Simpsons since 1989, then surely you know that Hank Azaria is one of the most important character actors of our time. He’s so prolific and his voice is so dynamic that he’s responsible for more iconic personalities than most folks realize. Basically, he’s the great and powerful Oz — except that when you pull back the curtain the truth is actually more impressive. And now Hank is coming to IFC to bring yet another character to the TV pop culture hive mind in the new series Brockmire. Check out the trailer below.

Based on the following Funny or Die short and co-starring Amanda Peet, Brockmire follows the story of imploded major league sportscaster Jim Brockmire as he tries to resurrect his career by calling plays for a floundering minor league team in a podunk town.

The series is written by Joel Church-Cooper (Undateable) and produced by Funny or Die’s Mike Farah and Joe Farrell, meaning that there’s funny in front of the camera, funny behind the camera–funny all around. Sounds like a ball to us.

Brockmire premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia On People Who Can’t Park

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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If flagrant bad parking takes nerve, then retaliatory note writing takes neuroses. Watch Fred and Carrie take passive aggression to next level in Car Notes, the new Portlandia web series presented by Subaru. The first episode is yours right here and now, and you can see every installment of Car Notes anytime online, on the IFC app and on demand.

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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