DID YOU READ

Happy Halloween! Watch “The Eye” “Venom” and “Cursed” today

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Happy Halloween! To help celebrate the most horrifying holiday around (not counting Aunt Gladys’ feeble attempt at Thanksgiving, of course) we are showing back-to-back horror flicks sure to get you in the mood for mayhem or to watch “The Exorcist” tonight at 8/7c. First up, clear your lunch calendar because today you’ll be dining with Jessica Alba. Yep, we’re showing “The Eye” at 12:15 p.m. ET. Alba stars as a cornea transplant recipient, who has the unsettling realization that her new eyes can see a lot more than what’s on her lunch plate and the color of her socks. Instead she sees disturbing supernatural images, which send her on a quest to find out what happened to the eyes of the previous owner.

At 2:15 p.m. ET we are showing “Venom.” In the film, a gas station owner is resurrected as a killer intent on terrorizing a group of teenagers (Agnes Bruckner, Jonathan Jackson, Laura Ramsey) in the swamps of Louisiana.

In “Cursed,” which starts at 4/3c, director Wes Craven and screenwriter Kevin Williamson reunite in an attempt to do for the werewolf movie what “Scream” did for the slasher flick. The result is Christina Ricci and Jesse Eisenberg as siblings cursed with the terrible affliction of being teenagers and werewolves:

Don’t forget to stay tuned for “The Exorcist” at 8/7c and have a happy Halloween!

Want the latest news from IFC? Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter @ifctv.

“The Eye” airs at 12: 15 p.m. ET; “Venom” airs at 2: 15 p.m. ET; “Cursed” airs at 4 p.m. ET

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Face Melting Cameos

The 10 Most Metal Pop Culture Cameos

Glenn Danzig drops by Portlandia tonight at 10P on IFC.

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Glenn Danzig rocks harder than granite. In his 60 years, he’s mastered punk with The Misfits, slayed metal with the eponymous Danzig, and generally melted faces with the force of his voice. And thanks to Fred and Carrie, he’s now stopping by tonight’s brand new Portlandia so we can finally get to see what “Evil Elvis” is like when he hits the beach. To celebrate his appearance, we put together our favorite metal moments from pop culture, from the sublime to the absurd.

10. Cannibal Corpse meets Ace Ventura

Back in the ’90s,  Cannibal Corpse was just a small time band from Upstate New York, plying their death metal wares wherever they could find a crowd, when a call from Jim Carry transformed their lives. Turns out the actor was a fan, and wanted them for a cameo in his new movie, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The band had a European tour coming up, and were wary of being made fun of, so they turned it down. Thankfully, the rubber-faced In Living Color vet wouldn’t take no for an answer, proving that you don’t need to have a lot of fans, just the right ones.


9. AC/DC in Private Parts

Howard Stern’s autobiographical film, based on his book of the same name, followed his rise in the world of radio and pop culture. For a man surrounded by naked ladies and adoring fans, it’s hard to track the exact moment he made it. But rocking out with AC/DC in the middle of Central Park, as throngs of fans clamor to get a piece of you, seems like it comes pretty close. You can actually see Stern go from hit host to radio god in this clip, as “You Shook Me All Night Long” blasts in the background.


8. Judas Priest meets The Simpsons

When you want to blast a bunch of peace-loving hippies out on their asses, you’re going to need some death metal. At least, that’s what the folks at The Simpsons thought when they set up this cameo from the metal gods. Unfortunately, thanks to a hearty online backlash, the writers of the classic series were soon informed that Judas Priest, while many things, are not in fact “death metal.” This led to the most Simpson-esque apology ever. Rock on, Bartman. Rock on.


7. Anthrax on Married…With Children

What do you get when Married…with Children spoofs My Dinner With Andre, substituting the erudite playwrights for a band so metal they piss rust? Well, for starters, a lot of headbanging, property destruction and blown eardrums. And much like everything else in life, Al seems to have missed the fun.


6. Motorhead rocks out on The Young Ones

The Young Ones didn’t just premiere on BBC2 in 1982 — it kicked the doors down to a new way of doing comedy. A full-on assault on the staid state of sitcoms, the show brought a punk rock vibe to the tired format, and in the process helped jumpstart a comedy revolution. For instance, where an old sitcom would just cut from one scene to the next, The Young Ones choose to have Lemmy and his crew deliver a raw version of “Ace of Spades.” The general attitude seemed to be, you don’t like this? Well, then F— you!


5. Red and Kitty Meet Kiss on That ’70s Show

Carsey-Werner Productions

Carsey-Werner Productions

Long before they were banished to playing arena football games, Kiss was the hottest ticket in rock. The gang from That ’70s Show got to live out every ’70s teen’s dream when they were set loose backstage at a Kiss concert, taking full advantage of groupies, ganja and hard rock.


4. Ronnie James Dio in Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny (NSFW, people!)

What does a young boy do when he was born to rock, and the world won’t let him? What tight compadre does he pray to for guidance and some sweet licks? If you’re a young Jables, half of “the world’s most awesome band,” you bow your head to Ronnie James Dio, aka the guy who freaking taught the world how to do the “Metal Horns.” Never before has a rock god been so literal than in this clip that turns it up to eleven.


3. Ozzy Osbourne in Trick or Treat

It’s hard to tell if Ozzy was trying his hardest here, or just didn’t give a flying f–k. What is clear is that, either way, it doesn’t really matter. Ozzy’s approach to acting seems to lean more heavily on Jack Daniels than sense memory, and yet seeing the slurry English rocker play a sex-obsessed televangelist is so ridiculous, he gets a free pass. Taking part in the cult horror Trick or Treat, Ozzy proves that he makes things better just by showing up. Because that’s exactly what he did here. Showed up. And it rocks.


2. Glenn Danzig on Portlandia

Danzig seems to be coming out of a self imposed exile these days. He just signed with a record company, and his appearance on Portlandia is reminding everyone how kick ass he truly is. Who else but “The Other Man in Black” could help Portland’s resident goths figure out what to wear to the beach? Carrie Brownstein called Danzig “amazing,” and he called Fred “a genius,” so this was a rare love fest for the progenitor of horror punk.


1. Alice Cooper in Wayne’s World

It’s surprising, sure, but for a scene that contains no music whatsoever, it’s probably the most famous metal moment in the history of film. When Alice Cooper informed Wayne and Garth that Milwaukee is actually pronounced “Milly-way-kay” back in 1992, he created one of the most famous scenes in comedy history. What’s more metal than that? Much like Wayne and Garth, we truly are not worthy.

Five favorite Luc Besson leading ladies

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Tonight at 8/7c we are showing Jason Statham in “Transporter 3.” Why? Because we know how to show you a good time and there’s nothing like a Jason Statham driven action flick to do it. This time around, the adrenaline is kicked up even higher once Statham realizes that both he and his precious cargo are rigged with explosive devices that will blow them both sky high if they wander more than 75 feet from the car. Sure hope they can find a bunch of drive-thru restaurants as they cruise from Marseille to Odessa. So what is the package that Statham has to deliver? Valentina (Natalya Rudakova), the daughter of the head of Ukraine’s Environmental Protection Agency who’s been kidnapped after dear old dad refused to do business with a decidedly non-environmentally-friendly company. On such an intense voyage, there is little doubt that Statham and Valentina will fall in love. Rudakova’s Valentina is kind of the ultimate dream girl of the film’s producer, Luc Besson. She’s rough and tough, but frail enough to need protection. She’s made of steel, but wears eye make up. She’s the ultimate leading lady.

Here are five of our favorite leading ladies in Luc Besson films. We’re only including films he directed, because this is our blog and we feel like it.

5. Joan in “The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc”

4. Johana Baker in “The Big Blue”

3. Leeloo in “The Fifth Element”

2. Mathilda in “Leon: The Professional”

1. Nikita in “La Femme Nikita”

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“Transporter 3″ airs tonight at 8 PM ET; Sunday, Nov. 4 at 10:30 PM ET; Tuesday, Nov. 13 at 8:00 PM ET; and Tuesday, Nov. 13 at 10:15 PM ET

Five favorite Whitest Kids U’Know sketches as chosen by the Whitest Kids U’Know

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If you spend much time around these parts, you probably already know and love the irrepressible sketch comedy troupe The Whitest Kids U’Know. If you’re new here, the five seasons of the Whitest Kids U’Know were some of the finest, funniest and occasionally crassest comedy sketches we’ve ever shown on our air. Now, The Whitest Kids U’Know are back on IFC during our DVR-friendly time slot known as The Automat. Check the schedule for details on when we are showing some of our favorite episodes of the Whitest Kids U’Know. For example, tune in tomorrow at 5 a.m. ET to start your day right with an episode of one of the wackiest, filthiest and funniest shows around.

Last year we spoke to the Kids –Darren Trumeter, Timmy Williams, Trevor Moore, Zach Creger and Sam Brown– and asked them about their personal favorite sketches over the five seasons the show was on the air. These are their favorites:

1. Abraham Lincoln

2. Sex Robot

3. The Grapist

4. Baked Beans

5. John Cleese

Want the latest news from IFC? Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter @ifctv.

The Whitest Kids U’Know air on IFC’s Automat tomorrow at 5 a.m. ET.

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