DID YOU READ

Tim Grierson on the Unlikely Smash Success of “The Expendables”

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Because so many movies make over $100 million these days — usually around 30 a year — it’s easy to be blasé when a film hits that once-impressive amount of box office. (This is even truer when a film like “The Green Lantern” can gross over $110 million and still, because of its huge budget, be labeled a commercial failure.) Nonetheless, you still get those sleeper surprises, those unexpected hits that strike a chord with audiences. Two years ago, one of those was “The Expendables,” which won two consecutive weekends at the box office in August. With a sequel coming next Friday, I’ve been thinking a bit about the first film. In retrospect, its success seems even more surprising than it was at the time — but, really, maybe it shouldn’t.

Opening August 13, 2010, “The Expendables” starred Sylvester Stallone, who also directed and co-wrote the film about a group of bad-boy mercenaries hired to take out the dictator of a fictitious South American country. Things get more complicated from there, but nobody who paid money for “The Expendables” went to see it for the plot twists. Instead, it was the chance to catch Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, and others shoot lots of guns, blow lots of stuff up, and kick a lot of ass. (Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger were in it, too, but only for one scene, and all they did was talk.) At that time, Stallone had been enjoying a bit of a career revitalization thanks to minor hits with “Rocky Balboa” and “Rambo,” but still, “The Expendables” looked sight-unseen like the sort of movie that would cater mostly to people who wanted to enjoy the fading, 60-something star play action hero one last time.

Turns out there were many, many people who wanted that experience. In its opening weekend, “The Expendables” bested the other new release, “Eat Pray Love,” in part because, improbably, a large percentage of women went to the testosterone-heavy Stallone vehicle. Ultimately grossing $103 million, “The Expendables” was the first movie to star Stallone to gross that much (or be the weekend box-office champ) since 2003’s “Spy Kids 3D: Game Over.” And while the movie was something of an “Ocean’s Eleven”-like roundup of venerable action stars, it wasn’t as if many of them individually had had such a huge hit in a while. (Putting aside Schwarzenegger and Willis for a moment, Statham had hit triple digits as part of 2003’s “The Italian Job,” and Li was the villain in 2008’s “The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.”) When box office prognosticators were making their summer predictions that year, few thought “The Expendables” would be one of the season’s biggest smashes — in part because it was distributed by an independent company, Lionsgate, as opposed to a major studio — but the movie found an audience, out-grossing seemingly surefire hits like “The A-Team” and “Knight & Day,” and surprising a lot of folks in the process.

Watching “The Expendables” recently, Stallone’s commercial accomplishment is all the more impressive because, honestly, it’s not that great of a movie. In a summer with big-budget spectacles like “Iron Man 2” and innovative thrillers such as “Inception,” “The Expendables” was a modestly conceived action flick without much story to it. There are a few attempts to pay lip service to the ways in which warfare strips soldiers of their souls, and Stallone clumsily tries to give his hardened hero a shot at redemption by returning to the South American country to rescue an imperiled woman (Giselle Itié) who helped him. But those moments of nuance are quickly overshadowed by an aggressively macho attitude in which the action sequences are punctuated by rampant brute force and bloody deaths. (While most action films tone things down a bit to earn a PG-13 rating that ensures a wider audience, “The Expendables” was unapologetically a hard R.) There aren’t great characters, there isn’t much good acting — “The Expendables” is carnage run amuck.

And, yet, those seeming liabilities are all part of the movie’s charm. With its aging stars and unsophisticated storytelling, “The Expendables” felt lovably old-fashioned. It wasn’t just that it featured actors who were big in the 1980s — in addition, “The Expendables” recalled an earlier era of action filmmaking in which the violence was unabashedly bloody and intense. Plus, there was an emphasis on using practical effects as much as possible. Wes Caefer, the film’s visual effects supervisor, wanted everything to look real, but even the movie’s cheesier effects — the budget was a relatively tiny $80 million — have an innocence to them. (Caefer, by the way, summarized the movie’s philosophy as well as anyone has: “The good guys should be badass and the bad guys should be badass and the weapons should be badass. Whatever was in the film had to be badass.”) Featuring lots of hand-to-hand combat and actual explosions, “The Expendables” exuded a grittiness that’s mostly gone out of slick, sleek action movies. (Without the success of “The Expendables,” it’s hard to imagine “Act of Valor” ever being made.) And while “The Expendables” would never be described as a very original piece of moviemaking, it was one of the few summer hits that wasn’t a sequel or based on a comic book — it has a distinctive, handmade quality that made it stand out in a season of high-tech sameness.

Two years later, we’re getting an inevitable “Expendables 2.” Critics weren’t kind to the first film, and I can’t imagine they’re going to be any nicer to the new movie — it’s not that type of film. But what’s amazing is that, when you think about it, this series isn’t really about stars or excitingly cool concepts. The “Expendables” franchise has been about enjoying an era that’s not around anymore, celebrating a brawny, old-school style of action filmmaking that went out of favor around the time that Stallone first stopped being a major box office draw. Those who dismiss this series will insist that Stallone and his B-list costars are hopelessly out of step with the times. The films’ fans will argue that that’s exactly the point.

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Hard Out

Comedy From The Closet

Janice and Jeffrey Available Now On IFC's Comedy Crib

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She’s been referred to as “the love child of Amy Sedaris and Tracy Ullman,” and he’s a self-described “Italian who knows how to cook a great spaghetti alla carbonara.” They’re Mollie Merkel and Matteo Lane, prolific indie comedians who blended their robust creative juices to bring us the new Comedy Crib series Janice and Jeffrey. Mollie and Matteo took time to answer our probing questions about their series and themselves. Here’s a taste.

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IFC: How would you describe Janice and Jeffrey to a fancy network executive you met in an elevator?

Mollie & Matteo: Janice and Jeffrey is about a married couple experiencing intimacy issues but who don’t have a clue it’s because they are gay. Their oblivion makes them even more endearing.  Their total lack of awareness provides for a buffet of comedy.

IFC: What’s your origin story? How did you two people meet and how long have you been working together?

Mollie: We met at a dive bar in Wrigley Field Chicago. It was a show called Entertaining Julie… It was a cool variety scene with lots of talented people. I was doing Janice one night and Matteo was doing an impression of Liza Minnelli. We sort of just fell in love with each other’s… ACT! Matteo made the first move and told me how much he loved Janice and I drove home feeling like I just met someone really special.

IFC: How would Janice describe Jeffrey?

Mollie: “He can paint, cook homemade Bolognese, and sing Opera. Not to mention he has a great body. He makes me feel empowered and free. He doesn’t suffocate me with attention so our love has room to breath.”

IFC: How would Jeffrey describe Janice?

Matteo: “Like a Ford. Built to last.”

IFC: Why do you think the world is ready for this series?

Mollie & Matteo: Our current political world is mirroring and reflecting this belief that homosexuality is wrong. So what better time for satire. Everyone is so pro gay and equal rights, which is of course what we want, too. But no one is looking at middle America and people actually in the closet. No one is saying, hey this is really painful and tragic, and sitting with that. Having compassion but providing the desperate relief of laughter…This seemed like the healthiest, best way to “fight” the gay rights “fight”.

IFC: Hummus is hilarious. Why is it so funny?

Mollie: It just seems like something people take really seriously, which is funny to me. I started to see it in a lot of lesbians’ refrigerators at a time. It’s like observing a lesbian in a comfortable shoe. It’s a language we speak. Pass the Hummus. Turn on the Indigo Girls would ya?

See the whole season of Janice and Jeffrey right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib.

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Die Hard Dads

Inspiration For Die Hard Dads

Die Hard is on IFC all Father's Day Long

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIPHY

Yippee ki-yay, everybody! It’s time to celebrate the those most literal of mother-effers: dads!

And just in case the title of this post left anything to the imagination, IFC is giving dads balls-to-the-wall ’80s treatment with a glorious marathon of action trailblazer Die Hard.

There are so many things we could say about Die Hard. We could talk about how it was comedian Bruce Willis’s first foray into action flicks, or Alan Rickman’s big screen debut. But dads don’t give a sh!t about that stuff.

No, dads just want to fantasize that they could be deathproof quip factory John McClane in their own mundane lives. So while you celebrate the fathers in your life, consider how John McClane would respond to these traditional “dad” moments…

Wedding Toasts

Dads always struggle to find the right words of welcome to extend to new family. John McClane, on the other hand, is the master of inclusivity.
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Using Public Restrooms

While nine out of ten dads would rather die than use a disgusting public bathroom, McClane isn’t bothered one bit. So long as he can fit a bloody foot in the sink, he’s G2G.
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Awkward Dancing

Because every dad needs a signature move.
Die Hard dance

Writing Thank You Notes

It can be hard for dads to express gratitude. Not only can McClane articulate his thanks, he makes it feel personal.
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Valentine’s Day

How would John McClane say “I heart you” in a way that ain’t cliche? The image speaks for itself.
Die Hard valentines

Shopping

The only thing most dads hate more than shopping is fielding eleventh-hour phone calls with additional items for the list. But does McClane throw a typical man-tantrum? Nope. He finds the words to express his feelings like a goddam adult.
Die Hard thank you

Last Minute Errands

John McClane knows when a fight isn’t worth fighting.
Die Hard errands

Sneaking Out Of The Office Early

What is this, high school? Make a real exit, dads.
Die Hard office

Think you or your dad could stand to be more like Bruce? Role model fodder abounds in the Die Hard marathon all Father’s Day long on IFC.

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Founding Farters

Know Your Nerd History

Revenge of the Nerds is on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs via Giphy

That we live in the heyday of nerds is no hot secret. Scientists are celebrities, musicians are robots and late night hosts can recite every word of the Silmarillion. It’s too easy to think that it’s always been this way. But the truth is we owe much to our nerd forebearers who toiled through the jock-filled ’80s so that we might take over the world.

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Our humble beginnings are perhaps best captured in iconic ’80s romp Revenge of the Nerds. Like the founding fathers of our Country, the titular nerds rose above their circumstances to culturally pave the way for every Colbert and deGrasse Tyson that we know and love today.

To make sure you’re in the know about our very important cultural roots, here’s a quick download of the vengeful nerds without whom our shameful stereotypes might never have evolved.

Lewis Skolnick

The George Washington of nerds whose unflappable optimism – even in the face of humiliating self-awareness – basically gave birth to the Geek Pride movement.

Gilbert Lowe

OK, this guy is wet blanket, but an important wet blanket. Think Aaron Burr to Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Hamilton. His glass-mostly-empty attitude is a galvanizing force for Lewis. Who knows if Lewis could have kept up his optimism without Lowe’s Debbie-Downer outlook?

Arnold Poindexter

A music nerd who, after a soft start (inside joke, you’ll get it later), came out of his shell and let his passion lead instead of his anxiety. If you played an instrument (specifically, electric violin), and you were a nerd, this was your patron saint.

Booger

A sex-loving, blunt-smoking, nose-picking guitar hero. If you don’t think he sounds like a classic nerd, you’re absolutely right. And that’s the whole point. Along with Lamar, he simultaneously expanded the definition of nerd and gave pre-existing nerds a twisted sort of cred by association.

Lamar Latrell

Black, gay, and a crazy good breakdancer. In other words, a total groundbreaker. He proved to the world that nerds don’t have a single mold, but are simply outcasts waiting for their moment.

Ogre

Exceedingly stupid, this dumbass was monumental because he (in a sequel) leaves the jocks to become a nerd. Totally unheard of back then. Now all jocks are basically nerds.

Well, there they are. Never forget that we stand on their shoulders.

Revenge of the Nerds is on IFC all month long.

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