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The 10 weirdest Batman moments that Christopher Nolan can’t erase

Batman and Robin

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“The Dark Knight Rises” has solidified Christopher Nolan’s legacy as one of the greatest filmmakers to bring Batman to the big screen, but let’s be honest: over the last 50 years, Gotham’s protector has had more than a few moments that are memorable for all the wrong reasons.

With that in mind – and to temper all of that grim-and-gritty stuff in current trilogy – here are 10 of the strangest moments from Batman’s live-action adventures that Nolan’s films will never be able to wipe from our collective memory.


The Batusi

No other moment encapsulates the camp and silly fun of the 1960s “Batman” television series like the sight of Adam West putting a Batman twist on the hottest go-go dance of the time, the Watusi. First glimpsed during the series’ premiere in 1966, the “Batusi” went on to become a go-go fad of its own, and has become a cultural touchstone of sorts for those familiar with Batman’s light-hearted television years. It’s a scene that will live forever in the hearts of the series’ fans, and live in infamy among those who prefer their Dark Knight a little, well… darker.


That time when the Batmobile drove up a wall

Not only did Joel Schumacher completely redesign the Batmobile in 1995’s “Batman Forever” and leave it looking like, well – let’s just say it made some people blush – but he also added a long list of new features to the Dark Knight’s wheels. Among those features was the ability to drive up walls. Go ahead and read that again, just in case it didn’t sink in. The car drove up walls. We’re not just talking about steep inclines here, people – we’re talking about vertical walls. And it was just as ridiculous as it sounds.


Bat-Suits! Now with more nipples!

One can’t help wondering what former Batman actors Val Kilmer (“Batman Forever”) and George Clooney (“Batman & Robin”) think of Christian Bale’s military-style spin on the Batman costume. Sure, Bale gets a bad-ass suit of kevlar, but those two (as well as Chris O’Donnell’s Robin and Alicia Silverstone’s Batgirl) got costumes with… wait for it… nipples!

Those were truly dark days for the Batman family. Never forget!


“I’ll get drive-thru.”

When the Batman franchise changed hands from Tim Burton to Joel Schumacher, no one knew what to expect from the new guy behind the camera. We got our first indication, though, when an otherwise impressive opening sequence in in 1995’s “Batman Forever” was punctuated by Alfred (Michael Gough) asking Batman (Val Kilmer) if he can be persuaded to take a sandwich with him. Batman’s responds with “I’ll get drive-thu” as he steps into the Batmobile. “Uh-oh,” said every single Batman fan in the world.

In the absence of an actual clip from the “Batman Forever” sequence, here’s the McDonald’s commercial that ended up repurposing the scene:


Poodles love the Remote-Control Batarang

Among all the ridiculous gadgets to appear in the 1990s Batman franchise, the remote-control batarang from “Batman Returns” is one of the most memorable – if only because its fatal flaw was that it could be thwarted by a house pet. Not only did this piece of weaponry from Batman’s workshop look like it was cobbled together from an old video-game controller, but its brief appearance in the film ends with the batarang being ripped out of the air by a poodle. Back to the drawing board, Batman!


Joker dancing to Prince

Nothing says Batman like a funky Prince jam. That was the case in 1989, at least, and while it’s hard to imagine anyone in Christopher Nolan’s Bat-verse getting funky to the musical stylings of the man who gave us “Raspberry Beret,” Jack Nicholson’s Joker pulled it off quite impressively. No matter how grim and gritty Nolan makes Gotham, we’ll always have the image of Nicholson in the Joker’s trademark purple-and-green suit, skipping around a museum and causing all sorts of wonderful havoc.


Shark-Repellent Bat Spray

Batman’s ability to always have the right tool for every situation was never more apparent than in a scene from the 1966 feature-length film based on the campy television series. While hovering over the ocean from the bottom of a rope ladder, Batman is attacked by a shark. After discovering that a few well-placed punches to the underbelly and fins don’t seem to have the desired effect, Batman politely requests that Robin deliver the “Shark Repellent Bat Spray” they conveniently brought along in the Batcopter. Robin makes his way down the ladder, then inexplicably decides to hang upside down from one of the rungs before handing off the bottle to Batman.

Yes, all of this happened. And once you see it, you can never un-see it.


Every line Arnold Schwarzenegger says in “Batman & Robin”

When Arnold Schwarzenegger was cast as Mr. Freeze in 1997’s franchise-ending “Batman & Robin,” we knew now to expect a complicated, nuance-laden performance. But no one expected that his entire role would consist of a series of one-liners that reference his character’s temperature-based theme. From “I’m afraid my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy” to “You’re not sending me to the cooler,” it became apparent early in the film that Mr’ Freeze’s ice gun wasn’t the scariest weapon in his arsenal. His terrible puns cut far, far deeper.


Batman has his own credit card?

Hypnotized by Poison Ivy’s pheromone powder, Batman and Robin compete in a bidding war for the company of the plant-whispering villain played by Uma Thurman. Batman has the last word when he whips out his Batman-themed “GothCard” credit card (“Good Thru Forever”). “Never leave the cave without it,” he remarks, prompting Batman fans all over the world to throw their televisions out the window.


“Chicks love the car.”

Oh, Batman – you’re such a smooth-talker. Wait, what? In one of the most infamous scenes from 1995’s “Batman Forever,” it would appear that Batman (Val Kilmer) forgets that it’s his alter ego who’s supposed to chasing women and not the guy wearing the cape and cowl. After psychologist Chase Meridian (Nicole Kidman) hits on Batman with the alluring line, “A girl can’t live on psychosis alone,” the Dark Knight replies with the oh-so-smooth line, “It’s the car, right? Chicks love the car.”

Seriously.

What is your favorite weird Batman moment? Tell us in the comments below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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Thank Azaria

Best. Characters. Ever.

Our favorite Hank Azaria characters.

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GIFs via Giphy

Hank Azaria may well be the most prolific voice and character actor of our time. The work he’s done for The Simpsons alone has earned him a permanent place in the pop culture zeitgeist. And now he’s bringing another character to the mainstream: a washed-up sports announcer named Jim Brockmire, in the aptly titled new series Brockmire.

We’re looking forward to it. So much so that we want to look backward, too, with a short-but-sweet retrospective of some of Azaria’s important characters. Shall we begin?

Half The Recurring Simpsons Characters

He’s Comic Book Guy. He’s Chief Wiggum. He’s Apu. He’s Cletus. He’s Snake. He’s Superintendent Chalmers. He’s the Sea Captain. He’s Kurt “Can I Borrow A Feeling” Van Houten. He’s Professor Frink. He’s Carl. And he’s many more. But most importantly he’s Moe Szyslak, the staple character Azaria has voiced since his very first audition for The Simpsons.

Oh, and He’s Frank Grimes

For all the regular Simpsons characters Azaria has played over the years, his most brilliant performance may have been a one-off: Frank Grimes, the scrappy bootstrapper who worked tirelessly all his life for honest, incremental, and easily-undermined success. Azaria’s portrayal of this character was nuanced, emotional, and simply magical.

Patches O’Houlihan

Dodgeball is a “sport of violence, exclusion and degradation.” as Hank Azaria generously points out in his brief but crucial cameo in Dodgeball. That’s sage wisdom. Try applying his “five D’s” to your life on and off the court and enjoy the results.

Harold Zoid

Of Futurama fame. The crazy uncle of Dr. Zoidberg, Harold Zoid was once a lion (or lobster) of the silver screen until Smell-o-vision forced him into retirement.

Agador

The Birdcage was significant for many reasons, and the comic genius of Hank Azaria’s character “Agador” sits somewhere towards the top of that list. If you haven’t seen this movie, shame on you.

Gargamel

Nobody else could make a live-action Gargamel possible.

Ed Cochran

From Ray Donovan. Great character, great last name [editorial note: the author of this article may be bias].

Kahmunra, The Thinker, Abe Lincoln

All in the Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian, a file that let Azaria flex his voice acting and live-action muscles in one fell swoop.

The Blue Raja

Mystery Men has everything, including a fatal case of Smash Mouth. Azaria’s iconic superhero makes the shortlist of redeemable qualities, though.

Dr. Huff

Huff put Azaria in a leading role, and it was good. So good that there is no good gif of it. Internet? More like Inter-not.

Learn more about Hank Azaria’s newest claim to fame right here, and don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Flame Out

Brockmire and Other Public Implosions

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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There’s less than a month until the Brockmire premiere, and to say we’re excited would be an insulting understatement. It’s not just that it stars Hank Azaria, who can do no wrong (and yes, that’s including Mystery Men, which is only cringeworthy because of Smash Mouth). It’s that the whole backstory of the titular character, Jim Brockmire, is the stuff of legends. A one-time iconic sportscaster who won the hearts of fans and players alike, he fell from grace after an unfortunate personal event triggered a seriously public meltdown. See for yourself in the NSFW Funny or Die digital short that spawned the IFC series:

See? NSFW and spectacularly catastrophic in a way that could almost be real. Which got us thinking: What are some real-life sports fails that have nothing to do with botched athletics and everything to do with going tragically off script? The internet is a dark and dirty place, friends, but these three examples are pretty special and mostly safe for work…

Disgruntled Sports Reporter

His co-anchor went offsides and he called it like he saw it.

Jim Rome vs Jim “Not Chris” Everett

You just don’t heckle a professional athlete when you’re within striking distance. Common sense.

Carl Lewis’s National Anthem

He killed it! As in murdered. It’s dead.

To see more moments just like these, we recommend spending a day in your pajamas combing through the muckiness of the internet. But to see something that’s Brockmire-level funny without having to clear your browser history, check out the sneak peeks and extras here.

Don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Mirror, Mirror

Portlandia Season 7 In Hindsight

Portlandia Season 7 Now Available Online and on the IFC App.

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Another season of Portlandia is behind us, and oh what a season it was. We laughed. We cried. And we chuckled uncomfortably while glancing nervously around the room. Like every season before it, the latest Portlandia has held a mirror up to ridiculousness of modern American life, but more than ever that same mirror has reflected our social reality in ways that are at once hysterical and sneakily thought-provoking. Here are just a few of the issues they tackled:

Nationalism

So long, America, Portland is out! And yes, the idea of Portland seceding is still less ludicrous than building a wall.

Men’s Rights

We all saw this coming. Exit gracefully, dudes.

Protests

Whatever you stand for, stand for it together. Or with at least one other person.

Free Love

No matter who we are or how we love, deep down we all have the ability to get stalky.

Social Status

Modern self-esteem basically hinges on likes, so this isn’t really a stretch at all.

These moments are just the tip of the iceberg, and much more can be found in the full seventh season of #Portlandia, available right now #online and on the #IFC app.

via GIPHY

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