DID YOU READ

Why there’s no sex in “Ruby Sparks”

Ruby Sparks

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By Jennifer Vineyard

One of Ruby’s first lines in “Ruby Sparks” is, “I missed you in bed last night.” That statement shocks Calvin, not the least of which because Ruby was, up until that moment, a figment of his imagination. But it’s a statement that could also be made by the film’s audience, since despite being a romantic dramedy starring a real-life couple, “Ruby Sparks” is short on sex. Sure, Paul Dano and Zoe Kazan kiss, and they even walk around in some scenes with few clothes on, but there’s no actual sex scene for this pair. This is intentional, the filmmakers and lead actor told IFC.

“I have no problem kissing Zoe,” Dano said. “But I don’t think the film needed a sex scene.”

“We talked about it a lot,” said co-director Jonathan Dayton, “and ultimately, we felt like this film didn’t really require a lot of explicit sex. For the most part, it was better to leave that to the theater of the mind, than to show it.”

“One of the things we were impressed with Zoe’s script was how it covered a pretty large territory pretty quickly,” said co-director Valerie Faris. “It didn’t feel like we were missing anything [not to have a sex scene], because I love all the places it goes, so we never really lived too long in any one place.”

The closest the film comes to a nude scene is when a sleazy Steve Coogan convinces Kazan to strip down to her underwear to join him for a late-night swim, but as soon as she does, Dano interrupts the two. “Steve, we love and have loved,” Faris said. “He only came in for a couple of days, but he made that character so much more dimensional because of all he brings to it.”

Plus, Coogan’s recent turns as a philanderer in “Our Idiot Brother” and “The Trip” helped put the image to mind of what he would have done, if he only had a chance. “It’s a gift!” Dayton laughed. “Unfortunately, he just has that quality,” Faris said. “But he’s a super great guy, and he’s in pretty good shape, too. He was in his underwear in the pool and six in the morning, and I felt so bad, because he had to get right back on the plane right after that.”

In lieu of sex scenes, the film concentrates on the magical romance between Dano’s writer Calvin and his creation Ruby (Kazan’s character), who materializes in real life after he’s written her on the page. Their relationship, as it is, is tightly controlled by whatever Calvin types, including her every mood; if she starts caring more about her career, all he has to do is type, “Ruby misses Cal desperately,” and she comes running back.

“We wanted the magical aspects of it to have a romantic high, and be wonderful to watch,” Dano said. “But we wanted the emotions to be real enough so that you would be invested and it feels real, because Ruby is real, even if she came from who-knows-where.”

“Once we were there, it was just about Calvin and Ruby,” Dano continued. “I think Zoe choose what she thought was best for the characters, and I don’t know if she considered our relationship while writing it. I think we would have felt self-conscious if the film felt like our real life, you know? I wouldn’t have wanted our real relationship in the film, and she knows me well enough to know that I would be pissed off if that happened. But the story has a life of its own, and it ended up being a good thing that we could bring an intimacy and a chemistry to the characters for their own sake.”

Still, for fun’s sake, Faris and Dayton joked that they could revisit the sex scene idea for a viral video campaign, and finally “take advantage” of Kazan and Dano’s relationship. “If ever there were a time when we could have shot a scene, we had a real-life couple!” Dayton laughed.

“Maybe we can use it for some ads,” Faris suggested.

“The ‘Ruby Sparks’ sex tape,” Dayton said.

“Oops! This might just leak out,” Faris laughed. “Good idea.”

Will you be seeing “Ruby Sparks” this weekend? Tell us in the comments section below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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Brock Hard

Brockmire’s Guide To Grabbing Life By The D***

Catch up on the full season of Brockmire now.

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“Lucy, put supper on the stove, my dear, because this ballgame is over!”

Brockmire has officially closed out its rookie season. Miss the finale episode? A handful of episodes? The whole blessed season?? You can see it all from the beginning, starting right here.

And you should get started, because every minute you spend otherwise will be a minute spent not living your best life. That’s right, there are very important life lessons that Brockmire hid in plain sight—lessons that, when applied thoughtfully, can improve every aspect of your awesome existence. Let’s dive into some sage nuggets from what we call the Book of Jim.

Life Should Be Spiked, Not Watered Down.

That’s not just a fancy metaphor. As Brockmire points out, water tastes “awful. 70% of the water is made up of that shit?” Life is short, water sucks, live like you mean it.

There Are Only Three Types of People

“Poor people, rich people and famous people. Rich people are just poor people with money, so the only worthwhile thing is being famous.” So next time your rich friends act all high and mighty, politely remind them that they’re worthless in the eyes of even the most minor celebrities.

There’s Always A Reason To Get Out Of Bed

And 99% of the time that reason is the urge to pee. It’s nature’s way of saying “seize the day.”

There’s More To Life Than Playing Games

“Baseball can’t compete with p0rnography. Nothing can.” Nothing you do or ever will do can be more important to people than p0rn. Get off your high horse.

A Little Empathy Goes A Long Way

Especially if you’ve taken someone else’s Plan B by mistake.

Our Weaknesses Can Be Our Greatest Strengths

Tyrion Lannister said something similar. Hard to tell who said it with more colorful profanity. Wise sentiments all around.

Big Things Come To Those Who Wait

When you’re looking for a sign, the universe will drop you a big one. You’re the sh*t, universe.

And Of Course…

Need more life lessons from the Book of Jim? Catch up on Brockmire on the IFC App.

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Oh Mama

Mommie May I?

Mommie Dearest Is On Repeat All Mothers Day Long On IFC

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The cult-classic movie Mommie Dearest is a game-changer. If you’ve seen it even just once (but come on, who sees it just once?), then you already know what we’re talking about.

But if you haven’t seen it, then let us break it down for you. Really quick, we promise, we’ll even list things out to spare you the reading of a paragraph:

1. It’s the 1981 biopic based on the memoir of Christina Crawford, Hollywood icon Joan Crawford’s adopted daughter.
2. Faye Dunaway plays Joan. And boy does she play her. Loud and over-reactive.
3. It was intended as a drama, but…
4. Waaaaaay over-the-top performances and bargain-basement dialogue rendered it an accidental comedy.
5. It’s a cult classic, and you’re the last person to see it.

Not sold? Don’t believe it’s going to change your life? Ok, maybe over-the-top acting isn’t your thing, or perhaps you don’t like the lingering electricity of a good primal scream, or Joan Crawford is your personal icon and you can’t bear to see her cast in such a creepy light.

But none of that matters.

What’s important is that seeing this movie gives you permission to react to minor repeat annoyances with unrestrained histrionics.

That there is a key moment. Is she crazy? Yeah. But she’s also right. Shoulder nipples are horrible, wire hangers are the worst, and yelling about it feels strangely justified. She did it, we can do it. Precedent set. You’re welcome.

So what else can we yell about? Channel your inner Joan and consider the following list offenses when choosing your next meltdown.

Improperly Hung Toilet Paper

Misplaced Apostrophes

Coldplay at Karaoke

Dad Jokes

Gluten Free Pizza

James Franco

The list of potential pedestrian grievances is actually quite daunting, but when IFC airs Mommie Dearest non-stop for a full day, you’ll have 24 bonus hours to mull it over. 24 bonus hours to nail that lunatic shriek. 24 bonus hours to remember that, really, your mom is comparatively the best.

So please, celebrate Mother’s Day with Mommie Dearest on IFC and at IFC.com. And for the love of god—NO WIRE HANGERS EVER.

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Breaking News

From Canada With Love

Baroness von Sketch Show comes to IFC.

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Breaking news that (finally) isn’t apocalyptic!

IFC announced today that it acquired acclaimed Canadian comedy series Baroness von Sketch Show, slated to make its US of A premiere this summer. And yes, it’s important to note that it’s a Canadian sketch comedy series, because Canada is currently a shining beacon of civilization in the western hemisphere, and Baroness von Sketch Show reflects that light in every way possible.

The series is fronted entirely by women, which isn’t unusual in the sketch comedy world but is quite rare in the televised sketch comedy world. Punchy, smart, and provocative, each episode of Baroness von Sketch Show touches upon outrageous-yet-relatable real world subjects in ways both unexpected and deeply satisfying: soccer moms, awkward office birthday parties, being over 40 in a gym locker room…dry shampoo…

Indiewire called it “The Best Comedy You’ve Never Seen” and The National Post said that it’s “the funniest thing on Canadian television since Kids In The Hall.” And that’s saying a lot, because Canadians are goddamn hilarious.

Get a good taste of BVSS in the following sketch, which envisions a future Global Summit run entirely by women. It’s a future we’re personally ready for.

Baroness Von Sketch Show premieres later this summer on IFC.

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