DID YOU READ

Ten reasons to watch “Napoleon Dynamite” on Sunday

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As a faithful reader of this blog you undoubtedly know that we already gave you five really good reasons not leave your couch on Sunday. But, if you have a really good excuse like, if you win the Mega Millions jackpot and need to roll around in your money or if your wife insists you join her at the hospital for the birth of your child or something, and you have to miss some of the movies we’re showing, you still have to make it back to watch “Napoleon Dynamite” at 8/7 c. Why? Because it is one of the funniest films of all time. Plus, we’re pretty sure it is in the Constitution that you have to watch “Napoleon Dynamite” every time it is on television. Vote for Pedro!

Here’s ten reasons to watch in the form of quotes from one of the best comedies ever:

1. “Just follow your heart. That’s what I do.” – Napoleon Dynamite

2. “You know… there’s like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I’m pretty good with a bo-staff.” – Napoleon Dynamite

3. “Well, you have a sweet bike. And you’re really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you’re like the only guy at school who has a mustache.” – Napoleon Dynamite

4. “Pedro offers you his protection.” – Pedro

5. “Napoleon, let go of me! I think you’re bruising my neck meat!” – Kip

6. “I see you’re drinking 1%. Is that ’cause you think you’re fat? ‘Cause you’re not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to.” – Napoleon Dynamite

7. “How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?… Yeah… Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would’ve been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind.” -Uncle Rico

8. Grandma: How was school?
Napoleon: The worst day of my life, what do you think?

9. “Last week, Japanese scientists explaced… placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to blow Nessie out of the water. Sir Curt Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the help of Scotland’s local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its residents, and all those who seek a peaceful existence with our underwater ally.” – Napoleon Dynamite

10. “After one week with me in my dojo, you’ll be prepared to defend yourself with the strength of a grizzly, the reflexes of a puma, and the wisdom of a man. So come down today for your free-trial lesson!” – Rex

“Napoleon Dynamite” airs on IFC on Sunday at 8/7c

Jackie That 70s Show

Jackie Oh!

15 That ’70s Show Quotes to Help You Unleash Your Inner Jackie

Catch That '70s Show Mondays and Tuesdays from 6-10P on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Carsey-Werner Company

When life gets you down, just ask yourself: what would Jackie do? (But don’t ask her, because she doesn’t care about your stupid problems.) Before you catch That ’70s Show on IFC, take a look at some quotes that will help you be the best Jackie you can be.


15. She knows her strengths.

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14. She doesn’t let a little thing like emotions get in the way.

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13. She’s her own best friend.

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12. She has big plans for her future.

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11. She keeps her ego in check.

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10. She can really put things in perspective.

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9. She’s a lover…

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8. But she knows not to just throw her love around.

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7. She’s proud of her accomplishments.

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6. She knows her place in the world.

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5. She asks herself the hard questions.

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4. She takes care of herself.

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3. She’s deep.

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2. She’s a problem solver.

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1. And she’s always modest.

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Is “The Changeling” the scariest movie ever?

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When George C. Scott moves into a mansion on the outskirts of Seattle he gets a lot more than peace, quiet, rain, and double nonfat cappuccinos. Instead he moves into one of the most unsettling ghost stories ever in “The Changeling”.

While on the surface, Peter Medak’s “The Changeling” isn’t the most evidently horrifying movie, there is something about the intimate, drawing-room atmosphere of this supernatural horror fiction that lingers with you for years. The impact is unsettling. In the film, classical composer John Russell (George C. Scott) relocates from New York to Seattle after his wife and daughter are killed in a car accident. He has a job lined up to teach at his alma mater, but is mostly looking for a quiet place to grieve, rest and continue writing music. Claire Norman (Trish Van Devere) at the Seattle Historical Preservation Society shows John a large, sparsely furnished estate in the outlying countryside that fits the bill perfectly. He takes the house, appreciating its remoteness and the solitude it might afford, and diverts himself by renovating and settling in. He even starts to compose again, putting aside his older work in favor of a new, sentimental piece for the piano. It is not long, however, before he begins having nightmares about the accident that killed his wife and daughter. Possibly because of this trauma, he is open to communications from the house’s ghostly occupants. Pursuing a loud, repetitive pounding noise in an upper room, he stumbles on the apparition of a young boy drowning in a tub. Working together with Claire, John discovers frightening parallels between this vision and buried events from the house’s past. Horror writer M.R. James once said that his goal as a writer was to make the reader feel “pleasantly uncomfortable.” Those looking for a similar experience in movies will appreciate “The Changeling” as a gem in the horror genre. And if the Oscars ever decide to hand out awards for best performance by an inanimate object, the wheelchair in the attic would definitely take the prize.

If this argument doesn’t convince you, maybe the Very Serious Voiceover in the trailer will:

“The Changeling” airs today on IFC at 3: 45 p.m. ET

Arrested Development Fans Unite to Save Steve Holt

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Fans of Steve Holt unite! As everyone’s favorite television show Arrested Development prepares to make it’s big move onto the silver screen and a fourth season, fans of a certain knuckleheaded-jock-with-a-heart-of-gold named Steve Holt! (the exclamation mark is implied and necessary) have noticed that the much loved yet minor character has not been invited to join the cast. Yet.

As the IFC favorite show prepares for its big comeback, the show’s stars including Jason Bateman, Will Arnett, David Cross, Michael Cera, Jessica Walters, Jeffrey Tambor, Tony Hale, Alia Shawkat and Portia de Rossi have all signed up to reprise their roles as the Bluth family. However one member of the extended Bluth family has not been invited back: Steve Holt!, the illegitimate son of George Oscar Bluth Jr. and four-time student body president. What is this, Game of Thrones? Just because Steve Holt! Is illegitimate, doesn’t mean he’s not family. Especially for the fans of the walking catchphrase.

Luckily the clever folks over at Reddit’s Arrested Development sub-group noticed that Justin Grant Wade, the actor who played Steve Holt, had not been contacted about the reprisal. So the fans took a page out of Steve Holt’s student body president run and started an online campaign to basically mention Steve Holt! as often as possible online until someone in power notices. There’s a Save Steve Holt website, blog, Facebook page, and Twitter account where the campaign is gaining some traction with the hashtag #savesteveholt. So if you feel as strongly about Steve Holt! as we do, get to hashtagging or just start walking around town shouting Steve Holt!

Now everyone do the chicken dance:

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