The 25 most quotable “Anchorman” one-liners

A scene from "Anchorman"

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5. “Don’t act like you’re not impressed.” — Ron Burgundy

4. “They’ve done studies, you know. 60 percent of the time, it works every time.” — Brian Fantana

3. “I’m in a glass case of emotion!” — Ron Burgundy

2. “You know I don’t speak Spanish.” — Ron Burgundy

1. “I love lamp.” — Brick Tamland

What is your favorite “Anchorman” one-liner? Let us know in the comments section below or on Facebook and Twitter.


Stephen's Lavish Life

Stephen Merchant Has Big Real Estate Dreams on This Week’s Comedy Bang! Bang!

Comedy Bang! Bang! is all-new Thursday at 11P with guest Stephan Merchant.

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Stephen Merchant says “Hello Ladies” on this week’s Comedy Bang! Bang!, dropping by to tell Scott all about the lavish lifestyle that comes with having cocreated The Office.

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The British actor and comedian sits down with Scott and Cudi to talk about his many homes and what he has in common with Elton John. Learn all about how Stephen rolls Thursday at 11p PT/ET after an all-new Benders and an encore of this week’s skate-tastic Gigi Does It.

Walking Dead

Zombie Killers

10 Weapons You Definitely Want in the Zombie Apocalypse

Catch Robert Kirkman on Comedy Bang! Bang!

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How do you kill that which is already dead? Spectacularly. Zombies aren’t just cannon-fodder — they’re guilt-free target practice for every weapon you can imagine. In celebration of The Walking Dead‘s Robert Kirkman on tonight’s Comedy Bang! Bang!, here are 10 items you definitely want when the inevitable zombie outbreak happens.

10. The Boomstick, Evil Dead franchise


Ash’s trusty sawed-off shotgun, aka the boomstick, is the perfect tool for winning any argument with the undead.

9. Double-Double-Barrelled Sawed-Off Shotguns, Resident Evil: Afterlife

Resident Evil

The only thing better than a double-barrelled shotgun? Double-double-barrelled shotguns! Resident Evil‘s Alice shows off her inhuman ex-human killing powers by loading four barrels with quarters for maximum enemy-shredding effect.

8. Chainsaw Hand, Evil Dead franchise


Ash’s chainsaw enhancement gives new meaning to the phrase “lend a hand.”

7. Machine Gun/Grenade Launcher Combo Leg, Planet Terror

Planet Terror Rose McGowan

When Cherry Darling gets a gun as a replacement left leg she uses it to kick dead ass far harder than any human limb. Especially when she launches the most epic crotch shot of all time.

6. Cricket Bat, Shaun of the Dead

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun of the Dead‘s characters attack incoming zombies with anything at hand, be it a handy cricket bat or a box of old vinyl records.

5. Morgan’s Bo staff, The Walking Dead

You can’t get much lower tech than a stick, making Morgan’s weapon the most easily maintained in any post-apocalyptic situation. It’s also the only weapon with a non-lethal option, enabling Morgan to maintain his respect for all living humans while still beating any of those humans idiotic enough to attack him.

4. Grand Piano, Zombieland

Zombieland has a magnificent musical moment when an old lady baits a zombie into a Looney Tunes-esque death by crushing underneath a grand piano. With Woody Harrelson banjoing another brain-eater into oblivion, the movie is an entire orchestra of undead-enders.

3. Michonne’s Katana, The Walking Dead

Michonne may be the most badass character in fiction. She doesn’t just defeat zombies, she slices them apart with utter contempt and keeps her own nearest and dearest undead on chains to protect her from the hordes. But only after amputating anything which would make them dangerous.

2. Decapitation Arrow Truck!, Juan of the Dead

Juan of the Dead

The decapitation arrow is one of the most glorious weapons we’ve ever seen, combining every benefit of staying alive — planning, teamwork, tool use, and the ability to shout “duck” — into a weapon that can create entire corpse circles.

1. Daryl’s crossbow, The Walking Dead

Shotguns announce your total victory over anything in front of you. They also announce your edible presence to everything in every other direction for miles. Expert hunter Daryl Dixon solves this problem with a badass crossbow. Silent, brutal, and you can even recover the bolts from collapsed corpses. Daryl knows the importance of recycling in the zombie apocalypse.


Should You Open the Package?

How Well Do You Know the Transporter Movies? Take Our Quiz!

Catch Transporter 3 this month on IFC.

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The action-packed Transporter trilogy is screeching onto IFC, where it intends to deliver car chases, explosions, and more Jason Statham than should be legally allowed. But how well do you know this high-octane franchise? Take our quiz on the Transporter movies below and find out.


at arrivals for PORTLANDIA Second Season Premiere on IFC, The American Museum of Natural History, New York, NY January 5, 2012. Photo By: Eric Reichbaum/Everett Collection

Carrie Loves Madonna?

5 Things We Learned About Carrie Brownstein From Her Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl Q&A

Get the scoop on Carrie's live book release event.

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Carrie Brownstein’s Hunger Makes Me A Modern Girl is out on shelves both physical and digital, and the book tour kicked off with a Q&A session for fans at the metal bar Saint Vitus in Brooklyn. Questlove from The Roots and The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon joined the Portlandia star on stage to moderate a conversation before a huddled crowd holding their plastic cups filled with draft IPA. “It’s familiar to both of us,” Brownstein joked. “There’s no bathroom backstage…it’s very humbling.”

From Madonna to Portlandia, check out some highlights from the Brownstein-Questlove extravaganza.

1. Carrie and Questlove Are Now BFFs

Portlandia pregnant

After the Portlandia funny gal read a passage from the book, which follows her life in music with the band Sleater-Kinney, Questlove remarked how surprised he was to hear he would be accompanying her for this event. “I don’t know if growing up we’d be best friends, but I know that we’re the same person,” he said. As proof that they would totally be Bffs, Brownstein continued to say how the first thing they bonded over backstage was the TV series The Affair, which she said is so unrealistic because both stars are British. “Half of The Wire is British,” Questlove said.

2. She Has a Major Madonna Obsession

Carrie call me

Some of the topics discussed were Brownstein’s band experience, absorbing feminism through punk rock, taping pictures of Dennis Quaid and Mel Gibson to her wall, and — more impactful — her obsession with Madonna. “I remember sitting on my bed and crying because I’d never be friends with Madonna,” she said of her 10-year-old self. Brownstein still hasn’t met her, though Questlove only hesitated a moment before bragging about how the “Material Girl” is “kinda” his manager. Guess we know what to get Carrie for her birthday.

3. She Went Incognito at Traffic Class

Portlandia driving

You know that traffic class you have to take after you get a ticket? No? Well, Brownstein does, because she had to take one. Not only that, but she took it just after the season 2 premiere of Portlandia. As she said, this wasn’t even season 1 when most people didn’t know her name. She was quite recognizable at this point, so to ward off unwanted attention at driver’s ed she tried to disguise herself as best she could.

4. Music Is Her Lifeline

Portlandia cat nap

Things got a bit real when Questlove asked Brownstein whether she would be okay with the possibility of her acting career overshadowing her musical endeavors. He likened the subject to how most people recognize him as “Jimmy Fallon’s drummer” instead of everything else he does with The Roots or his writing. The short answer is yes. She said she wouldn’t do anything creative — music or otherwise — if she didn’t want her named associated with it. That said, music has and always will be her “lifeline.”

5. Shocker! She’s Not a Ben Carson Fan

Portlandia what are you

Things got even more real when a fan asked a question about politics. Brownstein said that the fact that Ben Carson, and many other presidential candidates, came out against abortion and Planned Parenthood is “madness” and also shared her thoughts on racism and police brutality. She also noted “a collective voice of dissent” and “people starting to be more connected,” especially on social media. To lighten the mood, Carrie then joked, “Let’s have another clothing question.”

For more Carrie quotes, check out her Tumblr Q&A and our live-tweet of the Brooklyn event.

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