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Volkswagon unveils their “Star Wars” Super Bowl commercial

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The battle of the nostalgic film Super Bowl commercials is on! Only a few days ago, Honda teased and then released their “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”-themed ad that was intended for football’s biggest day. The commercial set the Internet on fire, and also overshadowed another recently-teased ad: Volkswagon’s “Star Wars” follow-up to last year’s Darth Vader kid commercial.

Called “The Bark Side,” the teaser featured a whole lot of adorable pooches barking the Imperial March. So, what we were able to glean from that is that the upcoming Super Bowl ad will have to deal with “Star Wars” and also have some dogs in it. Maybe even some more greyhounds dressed as AT-ATs.

Well, we were right about everything except the last bit.

Volkswagon’s commercial starts off with a chubby pup named Bolt who is too fat to get through his doggie door and chase the all-new Volkswagon Beetle down the street. After an impressive work-out montage, Bolt is able to lithely jump through the door and high-tail it down the street after the car.

You might ask yourself, so where’s the “Star Wars”? The scene pans back to reveal that the commercial was actually being watched by a bunch of galaxy lowlifes in the Mos Eisley Cantina. Two particular hooligans start arguing over which was cuter: Bolt or last year’s Vader kid in “The Force.”

“Are you kidding? The dog is funnier than the Vader kid,” determines one of the aliens, who suddenly finds it a bit hard to breathe. Cut to said Vader kid force choking him from across the bar. The lesson to be learned here is you never know who’ll be listening in Tatooine!

So which ad do you think won the battle of the Super Bowl commercials? Tell us in the comments section below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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Face Melting Cameos

The 10 Most Metal Pop Culture Cameos

Glenn Danzig drops by Portlandia tonight at 10P on IFC.

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Glenn Danzig rocks harder than granite. In his 60 years, he’s mastered punk with The Misfits, slayed metal with the eponymous Danzig, and generally melted faces with the force of his voice. And thanks to Fred and Carrie, he’s now stopping by tonight’s brand new Portlandia so we can finally get to see what “Evil Elvis” is like when he hits the beach. To celebrate his appearance, we put together our favorite metal moments from pop culture, from the sublime to the absurd.

10. Cannibal Corpse meets Ace Ventura

Back in the ’90s,  Cannibal Corpse was just a small time band from Upstate New York, plying their death metal wares wherever they could find a crowd, when a call from Jim Carry transformed their lives. Turns out the actor was a fan, and wanted them for a cameo in his new movie, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The band had a European tour coming up, and were wary of being made fun of, so they turned it down. Thankfully, the rubber-faced In Living Color vet wouldn’t take no for an answer, proving that you don’t need to have a lot of fans, just the right ones.


9. AC/DC in Private Parts

Howard Stern’s autobiographical film, based on his book of the same name, followed his rise in the world of radio and pop culture. For a man surrounded by naked ladies and adoring fans, it’s hard to track the exact moment he made it. But rocking out with AC/DC in the middle of Central Park, as throngs of fans clamor to get a piece of you, seems like it comes pretty close. You can actually see Stern go from hit host to radio god in this clip, as “You Shook Me All Night Long” blasts in the background.


8. Judas Priest meets The Simpsons

When you want to blast a bunch of peace-loving hippies out on their asses, you’re going to need some death metal. At least, that’s what the folks at The Simpsons thought when they set up this cameo from the metal gods. Unfortunately, thanks to a hearty online backlash, the writers of the classic series were soon informed that Judas Priest, while many things, are not in fact “death metal.” This led to the most Simpson-esque apology ever. Rock on, Bartman. Rock on.


7. Anthrax on Married…With Children

What do you get when Married…with Children spoofs My Dinner With Andre, substituting the erudite playwrights for a band so metal they piss rust? Well, for starters, a lot of headbanging, property destruction and blown eardrums. And much like everything else in life, Al seems to have missed the fun.


6. Motorhead rocks out on The Young Ones

The Young Ones didn’t just premiere on BBC2 in 1982 — it kicked the doors down to a new way of doing comedy. A full-on assault on the staid state of sitcoms, the show brought a punk rock vibe to the tired format, and in the process helped jumpstart a comedy revolution. For instance, where an old sitcom would just cut from one scene to the next, The Young Ones choose to have Lemmy and his crew deliver a raw version of “Ace of Spades.” The general attitude seemed to be, you don’t like this? Well, then F— you!


5. Red and Kitty Meet Kiss on That ’70s Show

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Carsey-Werner Productions

Long before they were banished to playing arena football games, Kiss was the hottest ticket in rock. The gang from That ’70s Show got to live out every ’70s teen’s dream when they were set loose backstage at a Kiss concert, taking full advantage of groupies, ganja and hard rock.


4. Ronnie James Dio in Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny (NSFW, people!)

What does a young boy do when he was born to rock, and the world won’t let him? What tight compadre does he pray to for guidance and some sweet licks? If you’re a young Jables, half of “the world’s most awesome band,” you bow your head to Ronnie James Dio, aka the guy who freaking taught the world how to do the “Metal Horns.” Never before has a rock god been so literal than in this clip that turns it up to eleven.


3. Ozzy Osbourne in Trick or Treat

It’s hard to tell if Ozzy was trying his hardest here, or just didn’t give a flying f–k. What is clear is that, either way, it doesn’t really matter. Ozzy’s approach to acting seems to lean more heavily on Jack Daniels than sense memory, and yet seeing the slurry English rocker play a sex-obsessed televangelist is so ridiculous, he gets a free pass. Taking part in the cult horror Trick or Treat, Ozzy proves that he makes things better just by showing up. Because that’s exactly what he did here. Showed up. And it rocks.


2. Glenn Danzig on Portlandia

Danzig seems to be coming out of a self imposed exile these days. He just signed with a record company, and his appearance on Portlandia is reminding everyone how kick ass he truly is. Who else but “The Other Man in Black” could help Portland’s resident goths figure out what to wear to the beach? Carrie Brownstein called Danzig “amazing,” and he called Fred “a genius,” so this was a rare love fest for the progenitor of horror punk.


1. Alice Cooper in Wayne’s World

It’s surprising, sure, but for a scene that contains no music whatsoever, it’s probably the most famous metal moment in the history of film. When Alice Cooper informed Wayne and Garth that Milwaukee is actually pronounced “Milly-way-kay” back in 1992, he created one of the most famous scenes in comedy history. What’s more metal than that? Much like Wayne and Garth, we truly are not worthy.

The top 10 prophecies in movies

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The year 2012 means terrible things for people who believe that the world will end along with the Mayan calendar on December 21. Thankfully, we have decades of movies to look back on and learn how to deal with whatever the apocalypse has to throw at us.

Biblical prophecies, Mayan prophecies and Jedi prophecies have all contributed to a rich legacy of cryptic future-telling in film, and whether or not they all came true, we love it when Roland Emmerich and Bruce Willis show us how things play out.

Depending on the source, Earth may overheat, its civilizations could crumble or the entire planet might just pop like a real-life Alderaan by the end of the year. So if end-of-the-world prophecies have you feeling glum, kick back and remember that our ten favorite movie prophecies were all make believe.


10. The coming of the Great Evil, “The Fifth Element” (1994)

Every 5,000 years, Earth has to deal with a destructive force that could end life as we know it, and this time around, Korben Dallas (Bruce Willis) and Leeloo (Milla Jovovich) are all that stand in its way. As far as apocalyptic events go, you can do a lot worse than Jovovich, and the film has an all-too-brief Luke Perry cameo to boot.


9. The Antichrist, “The Omen” (1976)

When it comes to the spawn of Satan, those of us who survived the turn of the millennium in 2000 will always be forced to remember “Little Nicky.” Luckily, however, we’ll always have “The Omen” as well. You just can’t replicate the ‘70s-style thrill ride that director Richard Donner’s film brought to theaters—though John Moore did try in 2006.


8. Satan’s child, “End of Days” (1999)

Far less subtle than “The Omen,” this explosion-fest heralded the arrival of the end times as only a movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and directed by Peter Hyams (the guy who made “Timecop”) could. The result turned out to be one of the most gratuitously violent romps of Schwarzenegger’s career, but it also gave us a lot to be thankful for when the year 2000 arrived without incident.


7. The Rapture, “Left Behind” (2001)

Buck Williams (Kirk Cameron) may not have been God-fearing enough to make it straight to paradise when all of the holiest people in the world vanished one day. He was lucky enough to have two sinful pilots flying his plane, though. Unfortunately, we were all punished with two long, grinding “Left Behind” films before President Louis Gossett Jr. arrived to help things move along in the third act.


6. The destruction of the Mayans, “Apocalypto” (2006)

Director Mel Gibson undertook one of the more noble feats of his career when he went back in time to get at the drama behind a previous, localized Mayan apocalypse. And we’ll say one thing for sure about his directing—Gibson knows how to make a little girl seem super creepy when she foretells the end of everything.

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Watch: Dogs bark out “Star Wars” Imperial March to tease VW Super Bowl ad

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What do you do when you’ve made the most-viewed ad of 2011? You up the cuteness ante for 2012, of course.

Volkswagon has released a teaser for their upcoming Super Bowl commercial and, like last year’s “The Force,” this one is “Star Wars”-themed. Called “The Bark Side,” it features a dozen adorable pups barking the “Imperial March.” In our neck of the woods, dogs always trump kids dressed as Darth Vader. Especially when you have a dog dressed as Darth Vader.

The force is strong with these mutts. Our personal favorite is the Greyhound AT-AT at the very end, but the pup dressed as Chewbacca has struck a chord as well. It’s unclear whether this minute-long teaser will be included in the Volkswagon Super Bowl commercial or whether it’s just showing the shape of things to come, but either way it seems like an awesome “Star Wars”-themed commercial will be playing during the Super Bowl on February 5. I guess this means we have to tune in, huh?

What did you think of this new Volkswagon commercial? Tell us in the comments section below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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