DID YOU READ

ADAPT THIS: “Underground” by Jeff Parker & Steve Lieber

underground

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With Hollywood turning more of its attention to the world of graphic novels for inspiration, I’ll cast the spotlight on a new comic book each week that has the potential to pack a theater or keep you glued to your television screens. At the end of some “Adapt This” columns, you’ll also find thoughts from the industry’s top comic creators about the books they’d like to see make the jump from page to screen.


This Week’s Book: Underground by Jeff Parker (w) and Steve Lieber (a)

The Premise: When two rangers investigating a local cave get caught up in a violent dispute over the land, they’re forced to flee into the depths of the mountain to evade their pursuers. As they venture further into the cavern, the rangers must use all of the tools at their disposal to get out alive and avoid the criminals chasing them.

The Pitch: Imagine all the claustrophobic terror of “The Descent” without the creepy monsters, and you’ll understand the appeal of Jeff Parker and Steve Lieber’s five-issue miniseries.

Originally published in 2010, Underground is a tense, frightening story about subterranean survival that also captures all the best aspects of a classic chase film, with its main characters on the run from thugs who outnumber, outgun, and outmuscle them — but can’t outwit them.

Both “The Descent” and “Buried” received heaps of praise for tapping into the scare factor of dark, confined spaces, and Underground succeeds in not only making that environment the centerpiece of the story, but also making the cave a character of sorts. Throughout the story, each twist and turn presents both the rangers and their pursuers with a new challenge, whether it’s submerged lakes, narrow passageways, deep caverns, or darkness-dwelling animals of one sort or another.

There have been one or two films set in caves over the years, but like “The Descent” most of them resort to blending the natural fears that accompany spelunking with some sort of supernatural or science-fiction element. Underground, on the other hand, has its human characters facing a very human threat — though the danger comes as much from the gun-wielding criminals pursuing them as it does from the inner workings of the mountain.

Given the right amount of imagination, a talented filmmaker could find some creative camera angles and set pieces to capture the scope of the cast’s predicament, giving audiences more than a few reasons to squirm as the film’s characters find themselves moving ever deeper into the darkness. This, combined with the relationship of the two rangers — who we know to be more than just professional colleagues — could likely make for some interesting juxtapositions of tight squeezes and two people deciding whether they’re getting too close for comfort.

Finally, while Parker and Lieber did a great of developing their principle characters in five issues, there’s still a lot we don’t know about the two rangers, as well as the criminals on their trail. Developing Underground into a feature-length film leaves ample room for a writer to shape the characters and give them more depth, which is always a nice way to flex creative muscles and put your stamp on a story.

The Closing Argument: In many ways, Underground combines the tense, dramatic narrative of an Alfred Hitchcock film with the natural terror of being trapped in a dark, uncertain place. The fact that the “place” is a massive cavern only opens the door to a long list of additional, environmental sources of fear, whether it’s bats, pits that appear to be bottomless, or watery tunnels that may or may not be your only escape route.

In the right hands, an “Underground” movie could be the scariest thing to hit the screen in a long time, and finally bridge the gap between celebrated scare-fests and critical darlings.


Do you think “Underground” would make a good movie? Chime in below or on Facebook or Twitter.

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Very NSFW

The Brockmire Premiere Is All Truth

Watch The First Episode of Brockmire Right Now for Free

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GIFS via Giphy

At long last, the Brockmire pre-premiere has arrived. Which means you can watch it right now—on IFC.com, at Funny Or Die, on IFC’s Apple TV and mobile apps, on Youtube, on Facebook, on the AMC apps, and right here. So grab some headphones and get watching.

No seriously, get headphones.

Because whether he’s giving a play-by-play or ruminating on the world around him, Jim Brockmire calls it like he sees it. And how he sees it is very NSFW. His take on life is actually quite refreshing, even to the point of being profoundly sage. For proof just look at these pearls of unconventional wisdom from the premiere…

Brockmire On The Internet

“If I need porn I just buy a nudie mag, like my father and his father before him.”

Brockmire On Sex-Ed

“Kids, a strap-on is a belt with d— on it that mommies use to f— daddies.”
Brockmire-Strap-On

Brockmire On The Perfect High

“Somewhere between 10 cups of coffee and very low-grade cocaine.”
Brockmire-Perfect-High

Brockmire On The Tardiness of Spring

“Old man winter’s reaching his hand inside your coat to give that thing one more squeeze.”

Brockmire On Keeping Perspective

“I thought I hit rock bottom in a handicap restroom in Bangkok where a Thai lady-boy snorted crank off my johnson while a sunburnt German watched us on the toilet”
Brockmire-grain-salt

Brockmire On Humanity

“If you want to look directly into the gaping maw of oblivion, don’t look up to the heavens. Just look in the mirror.”
Jules-never-seen

See these nuggets and more in the first episode of Brockmire, and see the whole season beginning April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Thank Azaria

Best. Characters. Ever.

Our favorite Hank Azaria characters.

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Hank Azaria may well be the most prolific voice and character actor of our time. The work he’s done for The Simpsons alone has earned him a permanent place in the pop culture zeitgeist. And now he’s bringing another character to the mainstream: a washed-up sports announcer named Jim Brockmire, in the aptly titled new series Brockmire.

We’re looking forward to it. So much so that we want to look backward, too, with a short-but-sweet retrospective of some of Azaria’s important characters. Shall we begin?

Half The Recurring Simpsons Characters

He’s Comic Book Guy. He’s Chief Wiggum. He’s Apu. He’s Cletus. He’s Snake. He’s Superintendent Chalmers. He’s the Sea Captain. He’s Kurt “Can I Borrow A Feeling” Van Houten. He’s Professor Frink. He’s Carl. And he’s many more. But most importantly he’s Moe Szyslak, the staple character Azaria has voiced since his very first audition for The Simpsons.

Oh, and He’s Frank Grimes

For all the regular Simpsons characters Azaria has played over the years, his most brilliant performance may have been a one-off: Frank Grimes, the scrappy bootstrapper who worked tirelessly all his life for honest, incremental, and easily-undermined success. Azaria’s portrayal of this character was nuanced, emotional, and simply magical.

Patches O’Houlihan

Dodgeball is a “sport of violence, exclusion and degradation.” as Hank Azaria generously points out in his brief but crucial cameo in Dodgeball. That’s sage wisdom. Try applying his “five D’s” to your life on and off the court and enjoy the results.

Harold Zoid

Of Futurama fame. The crazy uncle of Dr. Zoidberg, Harold Zoid was once a lion (or lobster) of the silver screen until Smell-o-vision forced him into retirement.

Agador

The Birdcage was significant for many reasons, and the comic genius of Hank Azaria’s character “Agador” sits somewhere towards the top of that list. If you haven’t seen this movie, shame on you.

Gargamel

Nobody else could make a live-action Gargamel possible.

Ed Cochran

From Ray Donovan. Great character, great last name [editorial note: the author of this article may be bias].

Kahmunra, The Thinker, Abe Lincoln

All in the Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian, a file that let Azaria flex his voice acting and live-action muscles in one fell swoop.

The Blue Raja

Mystery Men has everything, including a fatal case of Smash Mouth. Azaria’s iconic superhero makes the shortlist of redeemable qualities, though.

Dr. Huff

Huff put Azaria in a leading role, and it was good. So good that there is no good gif of it. Internet? More like Inter-not.

Learn more about Hank Azaria’s newest claim to fame right here, and don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Flame Out

Brockmire and Other Public Implosions

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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There’s less than a month until the Brockmire premiere, and to say we’re excited would be an insulting understatement. It’s not just that it stars Hank Azaria, who can do no wrong (and yes, that’s including Mystery Men, which is only cringeworthy because of Smash Mouth). It’s that the whole backstory of the titular character, Jim Brockmire, is the stuff of legends. A one-time iconic sportscaster who won the hearts of fans and players alike, he fell from grace after an unfortunate personal event triggered a seriously public meltdown. See for yourself in the NSFW Funny or Die digital short that spawned the IFC series:

See? NSFW and spectacularly catastrophic in a way that could almost be real. Which got us thinking: What are some real-life sports fails that have nothing to do with botched athletics and everything to do with going tragically off script? The internet is a dark and dirty place, friends, but these three examples are pretty special and mostly safe for work…

Disgruntled Sports Reporter

His co-anchor went offsides and he called it like he saw it.

Jim Rome vs Jim “Not Chris” Everett

You just don’t heckle a professional athlete when you’re within striking distance. Common sense.

Carl Lewis’s National Anthem

He killed it! As in murdered. It’s dead.

To see more moments just like these, we recommend spending a day in your pajamas combing through the muckiness of the internet. But to see something that’s Brockmire-level funny without having to clear your browser history, check out the sneak peeks and extras here.

Don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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